– Doktor Jashari, jam 22 vje\u00e7e dhe ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb m\u00eb ndodh q\u00eb t\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj z\u00ebra n\u00eb inkoshienc\u00ebn time. P\u00ebr shembull, m\u00eb plot\u00ebsohet fjalia q\u00eb kam nd\u00ebrmend. \u00c7far\u00eb kam? P\u00ebrse m\u00eb ndodh kjo?
\nDr. Jashar Demiri, psikolog klinicist: – Sa shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz tremben nga k\u00ebto fenomene! Ka mjaft raste kur n\u00eb mendje na vjen ndonj\u00eb mendim i friksh\u00ebm i cili nuk na hiqet, ashtu si\u00e7 mendja na p\u00ebrs\u00ebrit pa pushim ndonj\u00eb vjersh\u00eb apo melodi. Mendime t\u00eb tilla obsesive u ndodhin t\u00eb gjith\u00ebve, aq sa n\u00eb librin e ankthit thuhet se 97 % e popullsis\u00eb i kan\u00eb kaluar k\u00ebto s\u00eb paku nj\u00eb her\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e vet. Si\u00e7 dihet, nj\u00eb melodi apo nj\u00eb vjersh\u00eb q\u00eb na p\u00ebrs\u00ebritet, thjesht na habit se pse nuk na hiqet nga mendja, apo le ta themi se edhe na bezdis, porse krejt ndryshe ndodh me mendimet obsesive katastrofizuese. Imagjinoni nj\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb re, fjala vjen, kur na vjen e tregon me lot n\u00eb sy: \u201cM\u00eb vjen nj\u00eb mendim sikur dua t\u00eb mbys f\u00ebmij\u00ebn e vog\u00ebl, q\u00eb e dua aq shum\u00eb\u201d, ose \u201cpo sikur marr thik\u00ebn e sulmoj njer\u00ebzit e \u00e7muar t\u00eb familjes?!\u201d, etj. Imagjinoni nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb t\u00eb re apo nj\u00eb djal\u00eb t\u00eb ri, me moral t\u00eb lart\u00eb, me shum\u00eb sed\u00ebr e dinjitet, kur vjen e thot\u00eb \u201ckam frik\u00eb se mos e mendoj babain si mashkull ose n\u00ebn\u00ebn si fem\u00ebr e sikur dua t\u00eb b\u00ebj seks me t\u00eb\u201d. Vet\u00ebkuptohet q\u00eb k\u00ebtu, turpi, ankthi e depresioni e b\u00ebjn\u00eb \u201ctelef\u201d at\u00eb q\u00eb ankohet nga k\u00ebto lloj mendimesh obsesive e q\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqet t\u2019i nxjerr\u00eb me forc\u00eb nga mendja e vet. Mir\u00ebpo ankthi, pjes\u00eb e t\u00eb cilit jan\u00eb edhe mendimet obsesive, ka nj\u00eb veti: Sa m\u00eb shum\u00eb q\u00eb ti ta sulmosh, aq m\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb sulmon. Personi nuk e kupton se kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb di\u00e7ka q\u00eb i \u201cerdhi\u201d n\u00eb mendje pasi mendimi obsesiv i cili ngjitet si \u201crodhe\u201d \u00ebsht\u00eb me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb i pavarur nga vullneti i njeriut. Aq shum\u00eb t\u00eb frikshme dhe manipuluese jan\u00eb mendimet obsesive sa klienti jo vet\u00ebm q\u00eb ndihet fajtore pse e \u201clejoi\u201d t\u2019i vij\u00eb, por edhe i duket sikur e pranoi apo e \u201cd\u00ebshiroi\u201d k\u00ebt\u00eb skandal q\u00eb ia tha mendja dhe ai ka frik\u00eb se mos e humbet kontrollin dhe b\u00ebn ndonj\u00eb hata. Ai nuk e di se \u00ebsht\u00eb e kund\u00ebrta, se mund\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb ndodhur t\u00eb tilla tmerre \u00ebsht\u00eb zero, pasi ai \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb luft\u00eb edhe me mendimin t\u00eb cilin nuk ia pranon vet\u00ebdija e jo m\u00eb t\u00eb \u201cdetyrohet\u201d ta b\u00ebj\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ai e ka shum\u00eb frik\u00eb edhe ta mendoj\u00eb e jo m\u00eb ta veproj\u00eb. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb arsyeja pse k\u00ebta klient\u00eb, kur u vjen n\u00eb mendje ndonj\u00eb fantazi e frikshme apo e neveritshme, n\u00eb vend q\u00eb t\u00eb qeshin me t\u00eb e ta l\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb kaloj\u00eb si mjegulla, n\u00eb vend q\u00eb ta fshijn\u00eb ashtu si\u00e7 fshijm\u00eb pluhurat apo shkarkojm\u00eb VVC, fillojn\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrqendrohen tek ato, fillon t\u2019i vras\u00eb nd\u00ebrgjegjja e t\u2019u bjer\u00eb edhe vet\u00ebvler\u00ebsimi, aq sa pyesin veten: \u201cDeri n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb derexhe paskam r\u00ebn\u00eb?!\u201d. Klient\u00ebt nuk e kuptojn\u00eb se thjesht po mashtrohen, po manipulohen nga frika e cila b\u00ebn q\u00eb fantazia t\u2019u duket si mendim dhe mendimi t\u2019u \u201cmanipulohet\u201d si ndonj\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb prej t\u00eb \u00e7menduri apo humbje kontrolli me pasoja katastrofike. Imagjinoni nj\u00eb njeri i cili pran\u00eb nj\u00eb pike karburanti i \u201cthot\u00eb\u201d mendja: \u201cPo sikur t\u00eb ndez nj\u00eb shkrep\u00ebse, ta djeg, ta hedh gjith\u00e7ka n\u00eb er\u00eb?!\u201d. Pastaj mund t\u2019i duket sikur ka d\u00ebshir\u00eb ta b\u00ebj\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb dhe tmerrohet me katastrofat e asaj q\u00eb imagjinon dhe me rrezikimin e vetes. A nuk ju duket qesharake q\u00eb ai nuk \u201cguxon\u201d as t\u2019u afrohet tani e tutje pikave t\u00eb karburantit sepse e kap ankthi? Mos u trembni aspak nga ai dhe as mos e quani t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00eb! Ai thjesht po tregon p\u00ebr nj\u00eb \u201cz\u00eb\u201d t\u00eb huaj q\u00eb i vjen atij n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pavullnetshme dhe k\u00ebtu nuk ka p\u00ebrse t\u00eb ngat\u00ebrrohet situata, as me frik\u00ebn e ndodhive p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilat si\u00e7 tham\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb zero mund\u00ebsia q\u00eb t\u00eb ndodh\u00eb, as me ndonj\u00eb \u201cz\u00eb\u201d q\u00eb i vjen nga jasht\u00eb, pra, nj\u00eb si \u201cz\u00eb\u201d i huaj t\u00eb cilin ai po t\u00eb na thoshte: \u201cPo e d\u00ebgjoj v\u00ebrtet\u201d, do ta quanim t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00eb psikik me halu\u00e7inacione d\u00ebgjimore, q\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se d\u00ebgjon z\u00ebra edhe aty ku nuk ka, pra, jo thjesht i b\u00ebjn\u00eb vesh\u00ebt, por e \u201ck\u00ebrc\u00ebnojn\u00eb\u201d, e \u201curdh\u00ebrojn\u00eb\u201d etj.
\nEdhe p\u00ebr ju vajza 22 vje\u00e7are, nuk ka asgj\u00eb t\u00eb keqe pse fjalia ju plot\u00ebsohet nga mendja juaj, deri edhe me p\u00ebrgjigje q\u00eb ju mund t\u00eb mos i pranoni. Njeriu nuk mund t\u2019i kontrolloj\u00eb mendimet e tij, njeriu kontrollon veprimet e tij. K\u00ebto gj\u00ebra ndodhin m\u00eb shum\u00eb te njer\u00ebzit e ndjesh\u00ebm e me ndjenja t\u00eb larta p\u00ebrgjeg\u00ebsie, sepse k\u00ebta, si\u00e7 thon\u00eb fetar\u00ebt, i \u201cngacmon\u201d m\u00eb shum\u00eb \u201cshejtani\u201d, nga i cili nuk duhet t\u00eb tremben e as t\u2019i besojn\u00eb se asgj\u00eb nuk ndodh pa caktimin e Zotit. Imagjinoni nj\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb re, aq t\u00eb dhembshur e aq t\u00eb dashuruar me foshnjen e saj e cila nuk ka guximin q\u00eb t\u00eb vras\u00eb edhe nj\u00eb zog apo t\u00eb ther\u00eb nj\u00eb pul\u00eb dhe ka frik\u00eb se mos vret f\u00ebmij\u00ebn e saj vet\u00ebm e vet\u00ebm sepse ka d\u00ebgjuar ndonj\u00eb rast t\u00eb till\u00eb tep\u00ebr t\u00eb rrall\u00eb nj\u00eb n\u00eb disa milion\u00eb, kur s\u2019ka asgj\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt me ato e as me arsyet e tyre. Po t\u00eb ishte se do t\u00eb mendonim k\u00ebshtu, nuk do t\u00eb guxonte asnjeri q\u00eb t\u00eb hipte n\u00eb avion apo n\u00eb makin\u00eb, madje nuk do t\u00eb kishte as pilot\u00eb e as stjuardesa t\u00eb cil\u00ebt jo vet\u00ebm q\u00eb guxojn\u00eb t\u00eb fluturojn\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00eb, por dhe pik\u00ebllohen kur dalin n\u00eb pension. \u00cbsht\u00eb interesante se edhe n\u00eb librat fetar\u00eb thuhet se kur dikush i tha Profetit: \u201cUn\u00eb nuk vete m\u00eb te v\u00ebllai se m\u00eb duket sikur ma thot\u00eb mendja se ty t\u00eb p\u00eblqen nusja e tij, e kjo m\u00eb b\u00ebn m\u00ebkatar e me turp\u201d, Profeti i tha: \u201cKujdes, se shejtani do q\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00eb largoj\u00eb nga v\u00ebllai, ndaj shko si m\u00eb par\u00eb, ktheji shpin\u00ebn vesvesit dhe mos harro se ti nuk je m\u00ebkatar ose me turp as pse e shikove, as pse e p\u00eblqeve e as pse ta \u201cthot\u00eb\u201d mendja. M\u00ebkatar do t\u00eb ishe po t\u00eb b\u00ebje veprime\u201d… Besoj se u kuptuam. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
– Doktor Jashari, jam 22 vje\u00e7e dhe ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb m\u00eb ndodh q\u00eb t\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj z\u00ebra n\u00eb inkoshienc\u00ebn time. P\u00ebr shembull, m\u00eb plot\u00ebsohet fjalia q\u00eb kam nd\u00ebrmend. \u00c7far\u00eb kam? P\u00ebrse m\u00eb ndodh kjo? Dr. Jashar Demiri, psikolog klinicist: – Sa shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz tremben nga k\u00ebto fenomene! Ka mjaft raste kur n\u00eb mendje na vjen ndonj\u00eb mendim i […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[86],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6382","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-psikologu"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6382","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6382"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6382\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}