N\u00eb vitin 2007, fitova shkoll\u00ebn e lart\u00eb n\u00eb Fakultetin e Historis\u00eb dhe Filologjis\u00eb p\u00ebr Gjuh\u00eb-Let\u00ebrsi. Shkoll\u00ebn e mesme e kisha kryer n\u00eb qytetin e P\u00ebrmetit. Edhe pse atje kisha shum\u00eb ngacmime nga meshkujt, d\u00ebshira ime ishte t\u00eb fitoja shkoll\u00ebn e lart\u00eb e t\u00eb largohesha nga ai qytet. Pasioni im ishte psikologjia, por babai im k\u00ebmb\u00ebngulte t\u00eb studioja p\u00ebr m\u00ebsuesi, pasi ai e kishte d\u00ebshiruar shum\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb profesion, por p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb mund\u00ebsive financiare nuk mundi ta realizonte \u00ebndrr\u00ebn e tij.
\nIshte dit\u00eb e diel, un\u00eb u p\u00ebrgatita p\u00ebr t\u00eb ardhur n\u00eb Tiran\u00eb me shpres\u00ebn q\u00eb t\u00eb ndryshoja deg\u00ebn, por babai im k\u00ebmb\u00ebngulte t\u00eb mos e ndryshoja se p\u00ebrndryshe, do t\u00eb m\u00ebrzitej. Me lot n\u00eb sy u nisa dhe ajo q\u00eb m\u00eb shoq\u00ebronte, ishte n\u00ebna ime. Nuk doja t\u00eb vazhdoja at\u00eb deg\u00eb jo vet\u00ebm prej pasionit tim, por edhe sepse mendoja se ajo do t\u00eb ishte ogurzez\u00eb p\u00ebr mua. Nuk e di se pse ndjeja, frik\u00eb, ankth dhe zemra m\u00eb rrihte fort, sikur do t\u00eb m\u00eb dilte nga kraharori. Shpesh i thoja vetes sime: \u201cQet\u00ebsohu Anila se nuk do t\u00eb ndodh\u00eb asnj\u00eb gj\u00eb\u201d. Ndoshta e kisha k\u00ebt\u00eb frik\u00eb p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb jetes\u00ebs sime n\u00eb nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr ambient, me shoq\u00ebri krejt\u00ebsisht ndryshe nga ajo q\u00eb kisha pasur. Ndoshta frika ime lidhej edhe me menaxhimin e parave, pasi nuk isha marr\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb me k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb. U regjistrova n\u00eb godin\u00ebn 25 dhe n\u00eb dit\u00ebn e regjistrimit u njoha edhe me vajzat me t\u00eb cilat do t\u00eb ndaja dit\u00ebt e mia n\u00eb at\u00eb konvikt. N\u00eb impaktin e par\u00eb, asnj\u00ebra prej tyre nuk m\u00eb p\u00eblqeu. Kur hyra brenda, vet\u00ebm nj\u00ebra m\u00eb p\u00eblqeu dhe, n\u00eb at\u00eb \u00e7ast, po mendoja: \u201cO Zot, t\u00eb lutem, m\u00eb ndihmo t\u00eb jet\u00eb edhe kjo vajz\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb me mua\u201d. Gjat\u00eb nj\u00eb diskutimi t\u00eb shkurt\u00ebr doli q\u00eb ajo ishte nga nj\u00eb fshat i P\u00ebrmetit dhe emrin tim e kishte lexuar n\u00eb gazet\u00eb, te lista e student\u00ebve q\u00eb kishin fituar Gjuh\u00eb-Let\u00ebrsin\u00eb. Me sa vura re, edhe ajo ishte e g\u00ebzuar q\u00eb m\u00eb pa dhe d\u00ebshironte t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn gj\u00eb si un\u00eb. P\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb renditjes s\u00eb regjistrimeve, ne ram\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn dhom\u00eb. Mendova: \u201cSa mir\u00eb! T\u00eb pakt\u00ebn e kam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb me t\u00eb cil\u00ebn mund t\u00eb rri\u201d. Ajo quhej Anisa, nd\u00ebrsa dy vajzat e tjera, Elona dhe Greta. Me Elon\u00ebn dhe Gret\u00ebn nuk kisha marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie t\u00eb mir\u00eb, n\u00eb kuptimin q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb se flisnim shum\u00eb me nj\u00ebra-tjetr\u00ebn, pasi ato m\u00eb quanin mendjemadhe. Megjith\u00ebse Anisa kishte mosh\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb madhe se ne (rreth 29 vje\u00e7e), gjithsesi ne t\u00eb dyja kuptoheshim shum\u00eb mir\u00eb me nj\u00ebra-tjetr\u00ebn.
\nT\u00eb h\u00ebn\u00ebn ne nuk kishim m\u00ebsim dhe, pasi mbaruam leksionin, Anisa m\u00eb ftoi p\u00ebr nj\u00eb kafe. U ul\u00ebm te lokali af\u00ebr fakultetit. Pasi porosit\u00ebm di\u00e7ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb pir\u00eb, erdhi edhe kush\u00ebriri i saj. Anisa na prezantoi dhe n\u00eb momentin kur ai m\u00eb takoi, ma shtr\u00ebngoi dor\u00ebn shum\u00eb fort, duke m\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb: \u201cMua m\u00eb quajn\u00eb Ervis!\u201d. Me indiferentiz\u00ebm, ia ktheva: \u201cKurse mua, Anila\u201d. N\u00eb pamje t\u00eb par\u00eb nuk m\u00eb p\u00eblqeu, por kur buz\u00ebqeshte, di\u00e7ka ndodhte brenda meje. Ai vazhdonte me batutat e tij \u201csa serioze q\u00eb jeni!\u201d dhe sa vinte e tensioni shtohej. Po ndihesha n\u00eb siklet pasi mendova se mos ai kishte ardhur aty enkas p\u00ebr mua, por nga biseda q\u00eb po b\u00ebnin ata t\u00eb dy, e kuptova q\u00eb ishte rast\u00ebsi. Gjithsesi, di\u00e7ka nuk shkonte dhe un\u00eb nuk po ndihesha mir\u00eb, prandaj vendosa t\u00eb largohesha, me pretekstin se kisha pun\u00eb t\u00eb tjera. E pash\u00eb q\u00eb Anisa u m\u00ebrzit, nd\u00ebrsa Ervisi vazhdonte t\u00eb qeshte e kjo gj\u00eb vazhdonte t\u00eb m\u00eb acaronte. Anisa e merrte shpeshher\u00eb Ervisin p\u00ebr kafe. Si fillim, kjo gj\u00eb nuk po m\u00eb p\u00eblqente dhe mundohesha t\u2019i shmangesha, por m\u00eb von\u00eb u b\u00ebra pjes\u00eb e k\u00ebtyre kafeve. Mbr\u00ebmjeve, k\u00ebnaqeshim shum\u00eb. Nj\u00eb mbr\u00ebmje, Ervisi na p\u00ebrcolli deri te dera e konviktit, rrinte pran\u00eb meje dhe vura re q\u00eb nuk donte t\u00eb shkonte n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, madje insistonte t\u00eb q\u00ebndronte edhe pak. Ne u ngjit\u00ebm lart, kur n\u00eb telefonin tim, erdhi nj\u00eb mesazh: \u201cSa e mir\u00eb ishe b\u00ebr\u00eb sot! T\u00eb lutem, kam shum\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00eb dhuroj nj\u00eb tuf\u00eb me tr\u00ebndafila. T\u00eb pres p\u00ebrpara fakultetit nes\u00ebr\u201d. E lexova nj\u00eb her\u00eb, dy her\u00eb, e lexova s\u00ebrish. Nuk dija \u00e7far\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebja. Vendosa t\u00eb shkoja, pasi kishte prekur nj\u00eb nga pikat e mia t\u00eb dob\u00ebta, tr\u00ebndafilat. Pasi mbarova m\u00ebsimin, po q\u00ebndroja p\u00ebrpara shkoll\u00ebs dhe po prisja Ervisin me nj\u00eb tuf\u00eb me tr\u00ebndafila, por nuk po dukej asnj\u00eb njeri. Nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb, m\u00eb ra telefoni; ishte ai! M\u00eb tha t\u00eb shkoja te lokali ku ishim takuar p\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb. Vura re q\u00eb ai nuk kishte asnj\u00eb tr\u00ebndafil p\u00ebr mua, por m\u00eb tha se kishte \u201cnj\u00eb tuf\u00eb me puthje\u201d. M\u2019u mbush\u00ebn syt\u00eb me lot dhe i thosha vetes: \u201cAnila, si u tregova kaq naive?!\u201d. Doja t\u00eb largohesha, por papritur buz\u00ebt e tij prek\u00ebn buz\u00ebt e mia dhe zemra m\u2019u drodh. E shtyva me forc\u00eb dhe u largova. Mendjen e kisha l\u00ebn\u00eb mbrapa. Ervisi donte t\u00eb m\u00eb takonte dhe i binte telefonit pa pushim, por un\u00eb nuk e hapja, derisa nj\u00eb dit\u00eb m\u00eb ndaloi n\u00eb rrug\u00eb dhe m\u00eb tha: \u201cAnila, un\u00eb t\u00eb dua! Pse nuk e kupton q\u00eb un\u00eb t\u00eb dua?!\u201d. Kur pash\u00eb syt\u00eb e tij q\u00eb ishin mbushur me lot, nuk i rezistova dot dhe e p\u00ebrqafova fort. Dilnim \u00e7do dit\u00eb, shijonim paraditen t\u00eb dy, sh\u00ebtisnim bashk\u00eb, si dhe m\u00eb shoq\u00ebronte kudo q\u00eb shkoja. Ervisi ishte kthyer n\u00eb nj\u00eb engj\u00ebll mbrojt\u00ebs p\u00ebr mua. Nj\u00eb dit\u00eb po m\u00eb p\u00ebrcillte p\u00ebr n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, edhe pse nuk doja q\u00eb t\u00eb largohesha prej tij sepse ndjeja sikur nuk do ta takoja m\u00eb, madje po i thosha: \u201cZem\u00ebr, t\u00eb lutem, q\u00ebndrojm\u00eb edhe pak, m\u00eb duket sikur nuk do t\u00eb t\u00eb takoj m\u00eb\u201d. Ai qeshi e nuk foli asnj\u00eb fjal\u00eb. U largova e brengosur dhe me kok\u00ebn mbrapa, sepse e ndjeja q\u00eb nuk do ta shihja m\u00eb. Edhe pse arrita n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, ajo q\u00eb ndieja m\u00eb shtyu t\u2019i bija telefonit t\u00eb Ervisit dhe ai nuk po m\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigjej. U b\u00ebra merak dhe i rash\u00eb p\u00ebrs\u00ebri, kur papritur me erdhi nj\u00eb mesazh: \u201cAnila, m\u00eb fal, un\u00eb nuk mundesha t\u00eb ta thosha, por un\u00eb po shkoj shum\u00eb larg… Lidhja jon\u00eb k\u00ebtu mbaron, por dije q\u00eb un\u00eb t\u00eb dua dhe do t\u00eb t\u00eb dua gjithmon\u00eb. Nuk mund t\u00eb jemi bashk\u00eb\u201d.
\nGjith\u00e7ka u shemb p\u00ebrpara syve t\u00eb mi, nuk mund ta besoja, vazhdoja t\u2019i bija telefonit, por asgj\u00eb! Kush\u00ebrira e Ervisit nuk dinte asgj\u00eb p\u00ebr lidhjen ton\u00eb dhe un\u00eb isha e detyruar q\u00eb t\u2019ia tregoja pasi ajo duhet t\u00eb dinte di\u00e7ka p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb ikje t\u00eb tij kaq t\u00eb papritur. Ia tregova t\u00eb gjith\u00eb historin\u00eb dhe ajo u habit shum\u00eb. M\u00eb tha: \u201cPo t\u00eb kishe biseduar me mua, un\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb t\u00eb kisha l\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb lidheshe me kush\u00ebririn tim. Ai \u00ebsht\u00eb djal\u00eb shum\u00eb i mir\u00eb, por ka qen\u00eb i detyruar t\u00eb emigroj\u00eb p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb kushteve t\u00eb k\u00ebqija ekonomike\u201d. Ajo m\u00eb tha se, me siguri, ishte shtyr\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb ikur edhe sepse donte t\u00eb krijonte nj\u00eb t\u00eb ardhme m\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00eb p\u00ebr mua. Fjal\u00ebt e saj sikur m\u00eb qet\u00ebsuan pak…
\nShoqja ime u interesua n\u00eb familjen e Ervisit dhe mori informacionin se ai ndodhej n\u00eb Itali dhe kishte filluar pun\u00eb. I kishte marr\u00eb numrin e telefonit dhe ma dha mua. E mora n\u00eb telefon dhe fola me t\u00eb. Zemra m\u00eb rrihte aq fort! Sikur ta kisha aty, nuk munda t\u00eb flisja asnj\u00eb fjal\u00eb, vet\u00ebm i thash\u00eb \u201cpse me le?\u201d dhe shp\u00ebrtheva n\u00eb lot. Kuptova se edhe ai u prek shum\u00eb dhe m\u00eb tha se kishte nevoj\u00eb t\u00eb punonte sepse kishte marr\u00eb kredi p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb sht\u00ebpit\u00eb. I thash\u00eb: \u201cPo t\u00eb jet\u00eb edhe dashuria jote e fort\u00eb, ashtu si \u00ebsht\u00eb e imja p\u00ebr ty, do t\u2019i rezistojm\u00eb larg\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe do bashkohemi s\u00ebrish bashk\u00eb\u201d, por nga biseda q\u00eb b\u00ebra me t\u00eb, kuptova se ai nuk donte t\u00eb m\u00eb mbante peng. Ai m\u00eb sqaroi fare mir\u00eb se \u201cun\u00eb nuk i dihet se kur kthehem dhe nuk dua q\u00eb ta kem kok\u00ebn pas, duke e patur mendjen se nj\u00eb njeri \u00ebsht\u00eb duke m\u00eb pritur mua\u201d.
\nQ\u00eb prej asaj dite, nuk komunikova m\u00eb me Ervisin. Kuptova se dashuria e tij p\u00ebr mua nuk ishte e nj\u00ebjt\u00eb si e imja. Un\u00eb isha gati t\u00eb sakrifikoja p\u00ebr t\u00eb duke e pritur, po kjo nuk u realizua asnj\u00ebher\u00eb. Sot kan\u00eb kaluar vite q\u00eb prej ndarjes me t\u00eb dhe un\u00eb kam shum\u00eb frik\u00eb t\u00eb nis nj\u00eb lidhje tjet\u00ebr. Frika dhe ankthi se mund t\u00eb d\u00ebshtoj p\u00ebrs\u00ebri m\u00eb ka mb\u00ebrthyer dhe nuk m\u00eb l\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrjetoj nj\u00eb dashuri t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Ndoshta Ervisi ka krijuar nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr jet\u00eb, ndoshta \u00ebsht\u00eb i lumtur… nd\u00ebrsa un\u00eb vazhdoj t\u00eb vuaj p\u00ebr t\u00eb.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
N\u00eb vitin 2007, fitova shkoll\u00ebn e lart\u00eb n\u00eb Fakultetin e Historis\u00eb dhe Filologjis\u00eb p\u00ebr Gjuh\u00eb-Let\u00ebrsi. Shkoll\u00ebn e mesme e kisha kryer n\u00eb qytetin e P\u00ebrmetit. Edhe pse atje kisha shum\u00eb ngacmime nga meshkujt, d\u00ebshira ime ishte t\u00eb fitoja shkoll\u00ebn e lart\u00eb e t\u00eb largohesha nga ai qytet. Pasioni im ishte psikologjia, por babai im k\u00ebmb\u00ebngulte […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":5298,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6151","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6151","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6151"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6151\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5298"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6151"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6151"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6151"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}