P\u00ebrsh\u00ebndetje t\u00eb gjith\u00eb juve q\u00eb po lexoni tani… gj\u00ebja e par\u00eb q\u00eb mendova kur nisa t\u00eb shkruaja m\u00ebkatin q\u00eb kam b\u00ebr\u00eb, ishte q\u00eb do t\u00eb m\u00eb shani e ndoshta do t\u00eb m\u00eb urreni q\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb… E di, \u00ebsht\u00eb kjo arsyeja se pse nuk mund t\u2019ia tregoj askujt q\u00eb m\u00eb njeh, ndaj po plas nga brenda… Ju q\u00eb do ta m\u00ebsoni \u00e7\u2019kam b\u00ebr\u00eb, nuk do t\u00eb m\u00eb njihni me em\u00ebr dhe kjo m\u00eb shtyu t\u00eb shkruaja n\u00eb gazet\u00eb. Kam lexuar shumic\u00ebn e historive q\u00eb shkruhen k\u00ebtu, sidomos n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb faqe, kushtuar m\u00ebkatar\u00ebve dhe, t\u2019ju them t\u00eb drejt\u00ebn, n\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb shumt\u00ebn e rasteve, i kam mir\u00ebkuptuar p\u00ebr gabimet e tyre. Jeta nganj\u00ebher\u00eb t\u00eb shtyn t\u00eb b\u00ebsh at\u00eb q\u00eb nuk e kishe \u00e7uar kurr\u00eb n\u00ebp\u00ebr mend… k\u00ebshtu ndodhi edhe me mua.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb jam 28 vje\u00e7e (i mbush n\u00eb fund t\u00eb k\u00ebtij muaji), beqare. M\u00eb shohin shtremb\u00ebr zakonisht kur them k\u00ebt\u00eb fjal\u00ebn e fundit, se, kur thua q\u00eb je beqare n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb mosh\u00eb, t\u00eb gjith\u00eb mendojn\u00eb se nuk ke krijuar familje ngaq\u00eb do q\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebsh qejf, po t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn p\u00ebr mua, kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Q\u00eb nj\u00ebzet vje\u00e7e kam d\u00ebshiruar me shpirt t\u00eb krijoja familje, por ashtu erdh\u00ebn pun\u00ebt q\u00eb nuk munda. Isha e lidhur prej nj\u00eb viti me nj\u00eb djal\u00eb q\u00eb e kisha njohur n\u00eb fakultet dhe prisja nga dita n\u00eb dit\u00eb q\u00eb ai t\u00eb m\u00eb propozonte p\u00ebr martes\u00eb, kur m\u00ebsova se ai, n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, ishte fejuar me nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb nga fshati, q\u00eb ia kishte \u201cb\u00ebr\u00eb\u201d e \u00ebma. M\u00eb shum\u00eb u shokova sepse i njihja familjen dhe ajo m\u00eb njihte mua, bile e \u00ebma m\u00eb quante me shaka \u201cnuse\u201d, por ja q\u00eb ka edhe njer\u00ebz t\u00eb till\u00eb… Nuk e di \u00e7far\u00eb n\u00ebnash jan\u00eb k\u00ebto, po nejse, n\u00eb fund t\u00eb fundit, fajin m\u00eb t\u00eb madh e kishte i dashuri im, q\u00eb k\u00ebtej m\u00eb betohej p\u00ebr dashuri dhe, nga ana tjet\u00ebr, pranonte t\u00eb merrte nuse p\u00ebr mamin. Ta mendosh mir\u00eb, \u00e7\u2019do ta b\u00ebja nj\u00eb burr\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb qullash? M\u00eb e bukura ishte se edhe pasi e mora vesh (n\u00eb fakt, e mora vesh n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn m\u00eb t\u00eb dhimbshme t\u00eb mundshme; ma tregoi pik\u00ebrisht e \u00ebma e tij, sepse kishte frik\u00eb mos atij i vinte nusja e m\u00eb gjente mua n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi!), pra, edhe pasi e mora vesh, ai vinte e qante para meje me kok\u00ebrr t\u00eb lotit, duke m\u2019u lutur ta vazhdoja lidhjen me t\u00eb, sepse m\u00eb dashuronte…
\nTani m\u00eb vjen p\u00ebr t\u00eb qeshur kur i kujtoj ato koh\u00eb, por un\u00eb e di se sa kam vuajtur e sa net kam qar\u00eb duke iu lutur Zotit q\u00eb m\u00eb mir\u00eb t\u00eb vdisja sesa t\u00eb jetoja pa t\u00eb. Idiot\u00ebsira! Dashuria t\u00eb b\u00ebn m\u00eb shum\u00eb sesa budallaqe… po nejse. Po kthehem n\u00eb t\u00eb tashmen tani, q\u00eb t\u00eb mos ju lodh edhe juve.
\nP\u00ebr shum\u00eb koh\u00eb pasi u ndava nga i dashuri im, mua m\u00eb vinte p\u00ebr t\u00eb vjell\u00eb vet\u00ebm t\u00eb mendoja se mund t\u00eb lidhesha me nj\u00eb burr\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. As q\u00eb doja t\u2019ia dija se n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb bot\u00eb ekzistonin qeniet e kund\u00ebrta me ne, q\u00eb quhen burra. Budallall\u00ebku m\u00eb i madh m\u00eb dukej shprehja \u201cgjysma tjet\u00ebr\u201d. Un\u00eb ndihesha shum\u00eb e plot\u00eb vet\u00ebm, s\u2019kisha nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr gj\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb plot\u00ebsonte…
\nN\u00eb fakt, kishte qen\u00eb vet\u00ebm iluzion, sepse n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb m\u00eb nis\u00ebn problemet sh\u00ebndet\u00ebsore. Me sa duket vetmia e gjat\u00eb dhe hidh\u00ebrimi i shpirtit e kishin b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb tyren… Nisa t\u00eb kisha probleme me tiroidet, dhimbje barku (pas analizave doli se kisha nj\u00eb cist q\u00eb duhej mjekuar e, n\u00ebse nuk zhdukej, duhej b\u00ebr\u00eb operim), luhatje t\u00eb m\u00ebdha tensioni, dhimbje mesi… m\u00eb dukej sikur kisha marr\u00eb fund si njeri. Sa nisja t\u00eb mjekohesha p\u00ebr di\u00e7ka, m\u00eb fillonte di\u00e7ka tjet\u00ebr. P\u00ebr nj\u00eb periudh\u00eb t\u00eb gjat\u00eb m\u00eb ndal\u00ebn menstruacionet dhe ky qe v\u00ebrtet nj\u00eb tmerr sepse, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 problemeve sh\u00ebndet\u00ebsore q\u00eb m\u00eb shkaktonte kjo gj\u00eb, nisa t\u00eb kisha edhe shum\u00eb probleme psikologjike. M\u00eb dukej sikur po bija n\u00eb depresion. Mami kishte ngelur duke m\u00eb shoq\u00ebruar spitaleve. Sikur t\u00eb mos mjaftonte q\u00eb e kisha shqet\u00ebsuar n\u00eb at\u00eb periudh\u00eb q\u00eb u ndava nga ish-i dashuri dhe q\u00eb nuk po pranoja kurrsesi ndonj\u00eb mashkull n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time, ajo e shkreta duhet t\u00eb vuante edhe faktin q\u00eb un\u00eb nuk po ngrija m\u00eb kok\u00eb nga s\u00ebmundjet. Pik\u00ebrisht n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb koh\u00eb t\u00eb err\u00ebt p\u00ebr mua, ndodhi di\u00e7ka e \u00e7uditshme, q\u00eb do t\u00eb ndryshonte gjith\u00e7ka n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time dhe, mbi t\u00eb gjitha, konceptin tim p\u00ebr bot\u00ebn. Mjeku tek i cili po ndiqesha, m\u00eb tha se duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebja patjet\u00ebr konsult\u00eb me nj\u00eb mjek gjinekolog, pasi analizave t\u00eb mia, vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb mjek gjinekolog mund t\u2019u jepte shpjegim. At\u00eb dit\u00eb q\u00eb shkova te ky mjek, nuk i tregova n\u00ebn\u00ebs sepse m\u00eb vinte zor t\u00eb shkoja me t\u00eb te gjinekologu dhe sepse m\u00eb vinte keq q\u00eb e kisha lodhur aq shum\u00eb. I thash\u00eb se e kisha l\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb dilja me nj\u00eb shoqe p\u00ebr drek\u00eb. Takimin me mjekun e kisha l\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb or\u00ebn 12, por shkova pak m\u00eb her\u00ebt, me mendimin se ndoshta do t\u00eb kishte radh\u00eb dhe nuk doja q\u00eb t\u00eb ma zinte kush. Isha lodhur tani nga nj\u00ebri mjek te tjetri dhe doja si e si t\u00eb mbaroja pun\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb. P\u00ebr \u00e7udi, n\u00eb klinik\u00ebn e mjekut jo vet\u00ebm q\u00eb nuk kishte radh\u00eb, por n\u00eb holl m\u00eb priti vet\u00eb mjeku, i cili m\u00eb tha se nuk e kishte infermieren at\u00eb dit\u00eb. Ai m\u00eb pyeti n\u00ebse e kisha problem k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb, por un\u00eb buz\u00ebqesha me pyetjen e tij. At\u00ebhere buz\u00ebqeshi edhe ai dhe u fut\u00ebm brenda n\u00eb klinik\u00eb. Gjith\u00e7ka n\u00eb at\u00eb vend m\u2019u duk e bukur. Ai e kishte klinik\u00ebn n\u00eb katin e par\u00eb t\u00eb sht\u00ebpis\u00eb s\u00eb tij private dhe jasht\u00eb dritares un\u00eb shikoja nj\u00eb oborr aq t\u00eb bukur q\u00eb, t\u00eb them t\u00eb drejt\u00ebn, m\u00eb qet\u00ebsoi. Kam jetuar gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebn n\u00eb pallat dhe vdes t\u00eb kem nj\u00eb sht\u00ebpi private q\u00eb, ndoshta do ta kem nj\u00eb dit\u00eb… nejse. Mjeku ishte rreth t\u00eb pes\u00ebdhjetave, jo shum\u00eb i gjat\u00eb, i thinjur, por shum\u00eb i kujdessh\u00ebm dhe shum\u00eb babaxhan. P\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb pas aq shum\u00eb vizitave n\u00eb klinika apo spitale, po ndihesha rehat para nj\u00eb mjeku. Dhe, ta mendosh se ishte mjek gjinekolog; sikleti m\u00eb i madh i femrave!<\/p>\n
Ai m\u00eb pyeti p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjitha shqet\u00ebsimet q\u00eb kisha, pa t\u00eb gjitha analizat nj\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb dhe pastaj m\u00eb tha se nuk ishte nevoja t\u00eb b\u00ebnte nj\u00eb vizit\u00eb gjinekologjike (shyqyr Zotit!), por atij i duheshin disa informacione private t\u00eb miat dhe m\u00eb pyeti n\u00ebse e kisha problem t\u2019i p\u00ebrgjigjesha. Mohova, me buz\u00ebqeshje. Ai m\u00eb b\u00ebnte t\u00eb ndihesha shum\u00eb mir\u00eb; i vetmi mashkull, pas kaq shum\u00eb koh\u00ebsh! Mjeku m\u00eb pyeti kur e kisha nisur jet\u00ebn seksuale, sa kishte zgjatur, si kishte qen\u00eb ajo e gj\u00ebra t\u00eb tjera t\u00eb k\u00ebtij lloji. Iu p\u00ebrgjigja p\u00ebr gjithj\u00e7ka pa asnj\u00eb lloj sikleti. N\u00eb fund, ai m\u00eb tha se i vetmi problem q\u00eb kisha, ndon\u00ebse mund t\u00eb m\u00eb dukej i \u00e7uditsh\u00ebm, ishte se kisha nd\u00ebrprer\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet seksuale.<\/p>\n
– Je n\u00eb nj\u00eb mosh\u00eb, kur trupi yt k\u00ebrkon nj\u00eb jet\u00eb t\u00eb rregullt seksuale dhe mungesa e saj t\u2019i sjell t\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto shqet\u00ebsime – m\u00eb tha.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb qesha dhe i thash\u00eb se kjo ishte e pamundur, por ai k\u00ebmb\u00ebnguli se duhet t\u00eb nisja nj\u00eb lidhje sa m\u00eb shpejt t\u00eb ishte e mundur, qoft\u00eb kjo edhe nj\u00eb lidhje thjesht fizike.<\/p>\n
– Lidhje p\u00ebr seks?! – gati sa nuk b\u00ebrtita un\u00eb e \u00e7uditur. – Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb, \u00e7\u2019\u00ebsht\u00eb! Sikur t\u00eb mos mjaftoj\u00eb mami q\u00eb ma nxiu t\u00eb gjej burr\u00eb, tani ka nisur t\u00eb m\u00eb b\u00ebj\u00eb presion edhe trupi im, k\u00ebt\u00eb po p\u00ebrpiqeni t\u00eb m\u00eb thoni? – e pyeta.<\/p>\n
Ai qeshi dhe pohoi. Ishte gj\u00ebja m\u00eb e \u00e7uditshme q\u00eb kisha d\u00ebgjuar pas shum\u00eb e shum\u00eb koh\u00ebsh. I thash\u00eb mjekut se kjo nuk mund t\u00eb ishte e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb dhe ai m\u00eb tha: \u201cB\u00ebj nj\u00eb prov\u00eb e pastaj arrijm\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrfundim!\u201d. \u201cSfid\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb kjo?\u201d, e pyeta. \u201cMerre si t\u00eb duash!\u201d, m\u00eb tha. \u201cPo ku ta gjej un\u00eb nj\u00eb mashkull q\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00ebrheq\u00eb?\u201d, e pyeta si t\u00eb ma kishte ai fajin, por ai qeshi dhe m\u00eb tha se me siguri, dikush interesant p\u00ebr mua, mund t\u00eb ekzistonte n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb bot\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– E kam me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb! – iu hapa si pa t\u00eb keq – Pas kaq vjet\u00ebsh, ti je i vetmi mashkull interesant q\u00eb kam par\u00eb! – por sapo e thash\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb, ndjeva t\u00eb skuqesha, nd\u00ebrsa ai nisi t\u00eb qeshte. Me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb qeshte bukur.<\/p>\n
– Propozim \u00ebsht\u00eb ky? – m\u00eb tha dhe m\u00eb dha dor\u00ebn, duke m\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb se kurdo q\u00eb t\u00eb kisha nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb konsult\u00eb tjet\u00ebr, mund t\u00eb shkoja. I mora kartvizit\u00ebn dhe dola fare e shastisur nga ajo klinik\u00eb. At\u00eb nat\u00eb nuk fjeta. Isha e shokuar, nga nj\u00ebra an\u00eb nga fjal\u00ebt e mjekut dhe, nga ana tjet\u00ebr, nga qet\u00ebsia, kujdesi e shikimi i tij, q\u00eb m\u00eb kishin mbetur n\u00eb mendje…<\/p>\n
K\u00ebshtu ndodhi q\u00eb un\u00eb vendosa t\u00eb b\u00ebja nj\u00eb prov\u00eb me trupin tim dhe, i telefonova mjekut, k\u00ebt\u00eb her\u00eb jo p\u00ebr nj\u00eb konsult\u00eb sh\u00ebndet\u00ebsore, ndon\u00ebse n\u00eb nj\u00ebfar\u00eb m\u00ebnyre, ashtu si\u00e7 ma kishte shpjeguar ai, nj\u00eb lloj trajtimi do t\u00eb ishte edhe ajo q\u00eb po i k\u00ebrkoja: Doja thjesht t\u00eb b\u00ebja seks me t\u00eb!<\/p>\n
Jeni shokuar nga kjo, apo jo? Edhe un\u00eb e shokuar isha, fillimisht, por t\u00eb them t\u00eb drejt\u00ebn, kam m\u00eb shum\u00eb se dy vjet lidhje me k\u00ebt\u00eb njeri dhe, q\u00eb nga ajo koh\u00eb, nuk kam m\u00eb asnj\u00eb problem me sh\u00ebndetin tim. Do t\u00eb m\u00eb dukej budallall\u00ebk po t\u00eb ma thoshte dikush (si\u00e7 mund t\u2019ju duket edhe juve tani), por un\u00eb q\u00eb e kam provuar, e di se kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb e mundur. Kurr\u00eb mos thuaj kurr\u00eb thon\u00eb dhe un\u00eb k\u00ebshtu them… Kam nj\u00eb lidhje pa t\u00eb ardhme, por ndihem mir\u00eb dhe, \u00e7\u2019gj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme se kjo?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
P\u00ebrsh\u00ebndetje t\u00eb gjith\u00eb juve q\u00eb po lexoni tani… gj\u00ebja e par\u00eb q\u00eb mendova kur nisa t\u00eb shkruaja m\u00ebkatin q\u00eb kam b\u00ebr\u00eb, ishte q\u00eb do t\u00eb m\u00eb shani e ndoshta do t\u00eb m\u00eb urreni q\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb… E di, \u00ebsht\u00eb kjo arsyeja se pse nuk mund t\u2019ia tregoj askujt q\u00eb m\u00eb njeh, ndaj po plas nga […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5123","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5123","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5123"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5123\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5123"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5123"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5123"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}