T\u00eb dashur lexues, un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb burr\u00eb 42 vje\u00e7. Kam patur gjithmon\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb ta shkruaj historin\u00eb e jet\u00ebs sime, por asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk e mora iniciativ\u00ebn. Tani, duke e shkruar p\u00ebr Gazet\u00ebn \u201cIntervista\u201d ka nj\u00eb vler\u00eb t\u00eb madhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ata q\u00eb do ta lexojn\u00eb…
\nKam dy f\u00ebmij\u00eb, dy vajza; nj\u00ebra 11 dhe tjetra 6 vje\u00e7e. Ish-gruaja ime na ka braktisur para 5 vjet\u00ebsh. Ishte e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb kur m\u2019i la vajzat aq t\u00eb vogla. E madhja ishte 6 vje\u00e7e, kurse e vogla, sapo kishte mbushur 1 vje\u00e7e, mir\u00ebpo n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb un\u00eb kisha n\u00ebn\u00ebn gjall\u00eb dhe nuk e ndjeva aspak barr\u00ebn e r\u00ebnd\u00eb q\u00eb na la ajo, madje ishin vitet m\u00eb t\u00eb bukura t\u00eb jet\u00ebs sime. Ish-gruaja ime u largua me nj\u00eb shof\u00ebr taksie. E kishte takuar kur dilte t\u00eb b\u00ebnte pazar a ku ta di un\u00eb, sepse ajo nuk punonte, nuk kishte as profesion e as shkoll\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb. E doja shum\u00eb dhe i fala dashuri e nj\u00eb sht\u00ebpi t\u00eb bukur me t\u00eb gjitha t\u00eb mirat, por nuk isha njeri i djall\u00ebzuar, q\u00eb ta kuptoja se ajo m\u00eb tradhtonte. Vajza e madhe e mban mend mir\u00eb t\u00eb \u00ebm\u00ebn dhe shpesh e p\u00ebrmend edhe tani q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e rritur, por e vogla nuk e mban mend fare dhe sa her\u00eb m\u00eb ka pyetur p\u00ebr t\u00eb, i kam th\u00ebn\u00eb se ka ikur me pun\u00eb e do t\u00eb kthehet prap\u00eb. Ajo i ngjan shum\u00eb asaj, me flok\u00ebt e verdh\u00eb e me ka\u00e7urrela, me syt\u00eb e zinj pis dhe me nj\u00eb l\u00ebkur\u00eb t\u00eb but\u00eb si t\u00eb foshnjave. Sa her\u00eb e shoh, ma kujton at\u00eb grua dhe dashurin\u00eb q\u00eb kisha p\u00ebr t\u00eb, dashuri q\u00eb nuk e kam patur p\u00ebr asnj\u00eb grua tjet\u00ebr. Nejse, tani nuk dua t\u00eb shkruaj p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, por p\u00ebr gjendjen time t\u00eb tanishme dhe si do t\u00eb b\u00ebhet me dy vajzat e mia, kur un\u00eb t\u00eb mos jem m\u00eb.
\nN\u00ebna ime i rriti vajzat me shum\u00eb dashuri e p\u00ebrkujdesje, u dha nj\u00eb edukat\u00eb t\u00eb shk\u00eblqyer. Ajo vdiq para 2 vjet\u00ebsh dhe menj\u00ebher\u00eb pas k\u00ebsaj, un\u00eb nd\u00ebrrova sht\u00ebpi dhe u shp\u00ebrngula n\u00eb nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr qytet. Gjith\u00e7ka po m\u00eb ecte mir\u00eb, madje u njoha me nj\u00eb grua t\u00eb cil\u00ebn e kisha p\u00ebrball\u00eb aty n\u00eb lagje. Ishte tre vjet m\u00eb e vog\u00ebl se un\u00eb dhe nuk ishte martuar asnj\u00ebher\u00eb. Kishte qen\u00eb e fejuar m\u00eb par\u00eb dhe ishte ndar\u00eb. M\u00eb pas, nuk kishte marr\u00eb guximin t\u00eb fejohej a t\u00eb martohej prap\u00eb. Nuk e solla n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi q\u00eb n\u00eb fillim sepse nuk kisha besim se \u00e7\u2019njeri ishte.
\nPasi kishin kaluar nja disa muaj, ajo m\u00eb tha:
\n– T\u00eb mit\u00eb e kan\u00eb marr\u00eb vesh p\u00ebr ne, ndaj duhet t\u2019i shpejtojm\u00eb gj\u00ebrat se dhe t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl nuk jemi tani…
\n– T\u00eb kan\u00eb kusht\u00ebzuar q\u00eb t\u00eb mos dal\u00ebsh me mua?
\n– Jo \u2013 tha ajo me gjys\u00ebm z\u00ebri – po t\u2019i them nga ana ime k\u00ebto. E, n\u00eb fakt, \u00e7far\u00eb po presim?
\n– P\u00ebr mua nuk ka ndonj\u00eb problem. – i thash\u00eb, por me vete mendova se nuk isha gati ende t\u00eb \u00e7oja n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi nj\u00eb \u201cn\u00ebn\u00eb\u201d t\u00eb re p\u00ebr vajzat e mia. M\u00eb p\u00eblqente shum\u00eb, por se\u00e7 kishte di\u00e7ka q\u00eb nuk m\u00eb bindte. Ndoshta ngaq\u00eb sa her\u00eb flisja p\u00ebr vajzat, ajo nuk e zgjaste muhabetin, vet\u00ebm d\u00ebgjonte ato q\u00eb thoja un\u00eb dhe m\u00eb pas kalonte n\u00eb nj\u00eb tem\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. D\u00ebshiroja shum\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb kisha nj\u00eb grua e ta \u00e7oja n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, jo vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00eb ndihmuar n\u00eb pun\u00ebt e sht\u00ebpis\u00eb, por dhe si partnere. Edhe pse takohesha \u00e7do dit\u00eb me t\u00eb, doja ta kisha n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi e t\u00eb rrinte me mua. Pastaj e provova se si do t\u00eb sillej me vajzat e mia. I thash\u00eb se kisha nj\u00eb surpriz\u00eb dhe ajo erdhi menj\u00ebher\u00eb. Ishte shum\u00eb e qeshur nd\u00ebrsa po kalonte rrug\u00ebn dhe, kur pa vajzat, sikur i iku pak buz\u00ebqeshja, por e mblodhi veten shpejt.
\n– Sa vajza t\u00eb bukura! T\u2019jua puth pak faqet e bukura?
\n– Po, teta!
\nVajzat pranuan sepse si\u00e7 ju thash\u00eb m\u00eb lart jan\u00eb mjaft t\u00eb edukuara. Gjat\u00eb drek\u00ebs, un\u00eb v\u00ebrtetova at\u00eb q\u00eb e mendoja prej koh\u00ebsh. Ajo nuk do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb ishte n\u00ebna e duhur p\u00ebr vajzat e mia. Ndoshta ngaq\u00eb ende nuk kishte b\u00ebr\u00eb vet\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb, ose tani ishte e madhe n\u00eb mosh\u00eb dhe kishte harruar loj\u00ebrat e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve, por nuk kishte shum\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi arsyeja p\u00ebrse. Un\u00eb u ndjeva i leht\u00ebsuar q\u00eb kisha menduar sakt\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb.
\nMe kalimin e koh\u00ebs, u largova prej saj dhe ajo e kuptoi e u shk\u00ebput edhe vet\u00eb, pa nj\u00eb, pa dy. Pra, p\u00ebrs\u00ebri vet\u00ebm. K\u00ebsaj vetmie iu shtua nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr fem\u00ebr, po n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast ishte shum\u00eb e rrezikshme: S\u00ebmundja.
\nDuke punuar, m\u00eb ra t\u00eb fik\u00ebt. Shok\u00ebt m\u00eb \u00e7uan n\u00eb spital dhe pas shum\u00eb analizash, doli se kisha nj\u00eb tumor n\u00eb kok\u00eb. E si do ndodhte ndryshe?! Me gjith\u00eb ato q\u00eb kam kaluar un\u00eb, tumori madje m\u00eb ishte shfaqur me vones\u00eb. Vajzat, gjat\u00eb koh\u00ebs q\u00eb un\u00eb isha n\u00eb spital, i mbajti motra ime. E dija se i kisha t\u00eb sigurta, por nuk doja t\u2019ia lija p\u00ebr shum\u00eb koh\u00eb sepse burri i saj \u00ebsht\u00eb shum\u00eb nevrik dhe do t\u2019i shfryhej motr\u00ebs p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjitha. Mjek\u00ebt m\u00eb operuan dhe operacioni shkoi mir\u00eb. M\u00eb pas dola nga spitali dhe mora edhe vajzat n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi. Ato, kur m\u00eb shikonin me flok\u00ebt e qethur, ngryseshin, por un\u00eb u thoja se i kisha prer\u00eb sipas mod\u00ebs. I dua shum\u00eb dhe nuk duroj asnj\u00eb shenj\u00eb pak\u00ebnaq\u00ebsie n\u00eb syt\u00eb e tyre…
\n– Babi, po pse e ke t\u00eb fashuar kok\u00ebn? E ke vrar\u00eb? – m\u00eb thoshte e vogla.
\n– Po! – i thoja.
\n– Po ku e ke vrar\u00eb?
\n– N\u00eb pun\u00eb.
\n– A do ta vras\u00ebsh m\u00eb?
\n– Jo, zem\u00ebr!
\nKy ishte dialogu i \u00e7do dit\u00eb me vajz\u00ebn e vog\u00ebl e cila m\u00ebrzitej shum\u00eb kur ma shihte kok\u00ebn e fashuar. P\u00ebr deri k\u00ebtu nuk e kisha shum\u00eb problem, por \u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb ndodhte m\u00eb tej? Ia lash\u00eb fatit n\u00eb dor\u00eb…
\nE mora veten shpejt dhe k\u00ebrkova t\u00eb dilja n\u00eb pun\u00eb, por vendi i pun\u00ebs ishte z\u00ebn\u00eb. K\u00ebrkova shpjegime nga pronari, por ai, n\u00eb nj\u00ebfar\u00eb m\u00ebnyre, kishte t\u00eb drejt\u00eb. Nuk kishte si ta linte pun\u00ebn pa b\u00ebr\u00eb dhe kishte marr\u00eb nj\u00eb z\u00ebvend\u00ebsues, q\u00eb tani nuk e hiqte dot. Nejse, ky ndoshta ishte thjesht nj\u00eb justifikim nga ana e tij, por edhe mund t\u00eb ishte e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Sidokudo, un\u00eb nuk mund t\u00eb b\u00ebja asgj\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u rikthyer n\u00eb pun\u00eb. Duhet t\u00eb gjeja nj\u00eb pun\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. K\u00ebrkova shum\u00eb, por pa rezultat. M\u00eb n\u00eb fund, gjeta pun\u00eb si roje. Paga ishte e mir\u00eb po t\u00eb punoje nat\u00ebn, por un\u00eb nuk kisha ku t\u2019i lija vajzat, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb pranova t\u00eb punoja dit\u00ebn dhe me nj\u00eb pag\u00eb t\u00eb ul\u00ebt. Jeta filloi t\u00eb merrte ritmin e m\u00ebparsh\u00ebm, me disa v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi t\u00eb vogla. Kjo zgjati nj\u00ebfar\u00eb kohe, derisa s\u00ebmundja sulmoi p\u00ebrs\u00ebri. Kisha dhimbje n\u00eb kok\u00eb dhe shkova te doktori.
\n– Ne u munduam ta hiqnim t\u00eb gjith\u00eb mas\u00ebn, por ja q\u00eb ka qen\u00eb nj\u00eb mas\u00eb aktive dhe ka filluar p\u00ebrs\u00ebri t\u00eb ngrej\u00eb krye. – tha doktori.
\n– \u00c7far\u00eb duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebjm\u00eb doktor? Do t\u00eb operohem p\u00ebrs\u00ebri?
\n– Po, duhet, por nj\u00ebher\u00eb do t\u00eb marr\u00ebsh nj\u00eb mjekim e m\u00eb pas t\u00eb shohim.
\nAi m\u00eb dha mjekimin q\u00eb un\u00eb e mora menj\u00ebher\u00eb, mir\u00ebpo n\u00eb vetvete isha i frik\u00ebsuar, prandaj fillova t\u00eb mendoja p\u00ebr vdekjen. Po, po, p\u00ebr at\u00eb dhe p\u00ebr fatin e dy vajzave t\u00eb mia. \u00c7\u2019do t\u00eb b\u00ebhej me to? Kush do t\u00eb kujdesej ashtu si\u00e7 b\u00ebja un\u00eb, \u00e7do dit\u00eb? P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, mendova t\u00eb lidhesha me ish-gruan, n\u00ebn\u00ebn e vajzave. Asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk kisha k\u00ebrkuar p\u00ebr t\u00eb. Kisha marr\u00eb vesh tek-tuk ndonj\u00eb fjal\u00eb, por nuk doja t\u00eb dija shum\u00eb sepse do t\u00eb l\u00ebndohesha ngaq\u00eb akoma ndjeja di\u00e7ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb.
\nPas shum\u00eb k\u00ebrkimesh, e gjeta. Ishte martuar n\u00eb Zvic\u00ebr, me nj\u00eb zvicerian. Ishte ndar\u00eb nga taksisti dhe ishte martuar me t\u00eb. Kur i telefonova p\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb, e hapi telefonin dhe sapo e mori vesh kush isha, e mbylli e nuk e hapi m\u00eb. Pra, ajo nuk kishte nd\u00ebrmend t\u00eb merrte asnj\u00eb informacion as p\u00ebr mua, as p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e saj. K\u00ebt\u00eb kuptova dhe nuk kisha pse t\u00eb flisja m\u00eb me t\u00eb n\u00eb telefon e t\u2019i k\u00ebrkoja asgj\u00eb. Ajo kishte ikur e nuk e kthente m\u00eb kok\u00ebn pas. Tani, me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, nuk kishte kush t\u00eb kujdesej p\u00ebr vajzat e mia. I k\u00ebrkova nj\u00eb kush\u00ebrire t\u00eb m\u00eb njihte me ndonj\u00eb fem\u00ebr e t\u00eb lidhesha me t\u00eb, por si duket, ajo ua thoshte gjendjen time dhe asnj\u00ebra nuk doli n\u00eb takim me mua. N\u00eb spital, njoha nj\u00eb infermiere. Ajo ishte grua e divorcuar. Shkaku i divorcit ishte se ajo ishte sterile, pra, nuk b\u00ebnte f\u00ebmij\u00eb. Nuk ishte vet\u00ebm kjo, ajo q\u00eb m\u00eb shtyu t\u00eb lidhesha me t\u00eb, por edhe sjellja dhe karakteri i saj. Ishte nj\u00eb grua e urt\u00eb dhe kishte nj\u00eb pamje t\u00eb lezetshme.
\nN\u00eb fillim, ajo ishte pak e ndrojtur. Qe e kuptueshme, p\u00ebrderisa edhe ajo si un\u00eb, kishte patur zhg\u00ebnjime n\u00eb jet\u00eb. Nuk ishte faji i saj q\u00eb nuk b\u00ebnte f\u00ebmij\u00eb. Dihet se t\u00eb gjith\u00eb duan nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb dhe t\u00eb l\u00ebn\u00eb nj\u00eb trash\u00ebgimtar, por kur kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e mundur, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb faji i askujt. E kisha takuar her\u00ebn e par\u00eb kur isha n\u00eb spital dhe isha futur n\u00eb muhabet me t\u00eb. Her\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr, kur shkova vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb mjekimin, e takova dhe i k\u00ebrkova t\u00eb m\u00eb \u00e7onte te mjeku. K\u00ebshtu, pas vizit\u00ebs, pim\u00eb nj\u00eb kafe e m\u00eb pas nis\u00ebm t\u00eb pinim nj\u00ebr\u00ebn kafe pas tjetr\u00ebs. Duke treguar ato q\u00eb na kishin ndodhur, u miq\u00ebsuam, miq\u00ebsi kjo q\u00eb arriti deri n\u00eb pik\u00ebn kur i k\u00ebrkova t\u00eb njihej me vajzat e mia.
\n– Nuk e di a jam gati p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb. Ndoshta po nxitohemi…
\n– Nxitohemi? – i thash\u00eb me shaka, po q\u00eb kishte shum\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb brenda. – a kam koh\u00eb un\u00eb me gjith\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb tumor n\u00eb kok\u00eb?
\nAjo nuk qeshi menj\u00ebher\u00eb, por kur un\u00eb ia shkela syrin, asnj\u00ebri nuk e mbajti dot t\u00eb qeshur\u00ebn. Ndiheshim mir\u00eb me nj\u00ebri-tjetrin dhe tani do t\u00eb provonim se si do t\u00eb ndiheshim t\u00eb kat\u00ebrt, bashk\u00eb me vajzat.
\nE lam\u00eb t\u00eb takoheshim te sht\u00ebpia ime. Kisha besim tek ajo. Nuk kisha pse t\u00eb dyshoja se isha i sigurt\u00eb p\u00ebr at\u00eb njeri. Ajo kishte treguar gjithmon\u00eb se ishte nj\u00eb njeri me t\u00eb gjitha t\u00eb mirat e sidomos, shum\u00eb e kulturuar dhe e zgjuar. Q\u00eb n\u00eb \u00e7astin e par\u00eb, pash\u00eb se fati kishte trokitur k\u00ebt\u00eb radh\u00eb n\u00eb der\u00ebn time. Menj\u00ebher\u00eb, ajo krijoi lidhje me vajzat, nd\u00ebrtoi nj\u00eb komunikim t\u00eb p\u00ebrsosur dhe kaloi prov\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u2019u b\u00ebr\u00eb pjes\u00eb e jona. Tani un\u00eb jetoj me t\u00eb dhe ndjehemi shum\u00eb mir\u00eb. Pavar\u00ebsisht se s\u00ebmundja ime m\u00eb jep sinjale shpesh, e di se, kur t\u00eb vij\u00eb koha q\u00eb t\u00eb iki, vajzat e mia do t\u00eb jen\u00eb n\u00eb duart t\u00eb sigurta.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
T\u00eb dashur lexues, un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb burr\u00eb 42 vje\u00e7. Kam patur gjithmon\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb ta shkruaj historin\u00eb e jet\u00ebs sime, por asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk e mora iniciativ\u00ebn. Tani, duke e shkruar p\u00ebr Gazet\u00ebn \u201cIntervista\u201d ka nj\u00eb vler\u00eb t\u00eb madhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ata q\u00eb do ta lexojn\u00eb… Kam dy f\u00ebmij\u00eb, dy vajza; nj\u00ebra […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3800","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3800","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3800"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3800\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3800"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3800"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3800"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}