Q\u00eb n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb njom\u00eb, ne m\u00ebsojm\u00eb m\u00ebnyra t\u00eb ndryshme p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur d\u00ebshirat tona. Edhe kur ishim bebe, arrinim t\u00eb merrnim at\u00eb q\u00eb donim, fal\u00eb t\u00eb qarave apo buz\u00ebqeshjeve. Tani, n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb rritur, ne p\u00ebrdorim nganj\u00ebher\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat manovra p\u00ebr t\u00eb bindur t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt: Joshjen, zbutjen, zem\u00ebrimin, etj. Megjithat\u00eb, ka edhe njer\u00ebz q\u00eb kan\u00eb sjellje m\u00eb manipuluese dhe nuk hezitojn\u00eb t\u00eb abuzojn\u00eb me besimin e t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve p\u00ebr t\u00eb arritur q\u00ebllimet e tyre. Po ju, jeni manipulues\/e? P\u00ebr ta m\u00ebsuar, p\u00ebrgjigjjuni sinqerisht 10 pyetjeve t\u00eb m\u00ebposhtme.<\/p>\n
1. Nj\u00eb nga shok\u00ebt tuaj vonon borxhin q\u00eb ju ka marr\u00eb. Ju:
\na. Imagjinoni se nuk do t\u2019i shihni m\u00eb kurr\u00eb me sy ato para.
\nb. E b\u00ebni t\u00eb besoj\u00eb se nuk keni lek\u00eb t\u00eb paguani qiran\u00eb.
\nc. Ia k\u00ebrkoni, n\u00eb em\u00ebr t\u00eb miq\u00ebsis\u00eb q\u00eb keni
\nd. I b\u00ebni nj\u00eb fatur\u00eb fallco, me nj\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb madhe<\/p>\n
2. Keni parandjenj\u00ebn q\u00eb partneri\/ja ju tradhton:
\na. Ju nuk thoni asnj\u00eb fjal\u00eb, kjo mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb di\u00e7ka kalimtare.
\nb. I kontrolloni xhepat p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00ebsuar sekretet e tij.
\nc. Vendosni t\u00eb darkoni s\u00eb bashku n\u00ebn drit\u00ebn e qirinjve, p\u00ebr ta mahnitur.
\nd. Ai\/ajo nuk do t\u00eb dal\u00eb q\u00eb k\u00ebtu, pa ju th\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebn!<\/p>\n
3. Partneri\/juaj do t\u00eb donte t\u00eb vizitonte Seviljen k\u00ebt\u00eb ver\u00eb, por ju keni d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb vizitoni nj\u00eb mik n\u00eb Lond\u00ebr, ndaj i thoni:
\na. Je i\/e sigurt\u00eb se do t\u00eb shkosh n\u00eb Sevilje?
\nb. Sevilja \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb ide e mir\u00eb, por mua, nxeht\u00ebsia m\u00eb s\u00ebmur!
\nc. Besom\u00eb mua, do ta adhurosh Londr\u00ebn!
\nd. N\u00ebse ti nuk vjen, do t\u00eb nisem vet\u00ebm!<\/p>\n
4. Kur ishit f\u00ebmij\u00eb, p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb nj\u00eb lod\u00ebr q\u00eb e d\u00ebshironit shum\u00eb, ju:
\na. Prisnit t\u00eb merrnit nota t\u00eb mira p\u00ebr ta k\u00ebrkuar
\nb. Kurdisnit nj\u00eb komedi t\u00eb t\u00ebr\u00eb.
\nc. U p\u00ebrk\u00ebdheleshit prind\u00ebrve.
\nd. K\u00ebmb\u00ebngulnit derisa t\u2019jua plot\u00ebsonin d\u00ebshir\u00ebn.<\/p>\n
5. \u00cbsht\u00eb von\u00eb dhe do t\u00eb donit q\u00eb kolegu t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundoj\u00eb pun\u00ebn tuaj:
\na. Nuk b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb t\u2019ia k\u00ebrkoni, edhe ai \u00ebsht\u00eb i z\u00ebn\u00eb me pun\u00eb.
\nb. I thoni: \u201cT\u00eb lutem, mund t\u00eb m\u00eb ndihmosh?\u201d
\nc. I thoni: \u201cB\u00ebje k\u00ebt\u00eb p\u00ebr mua!\u201d
\nd. I thoni: \u201cTi je m\u00eb i shpejt\u00eb se un\u00eb!\u201d<\/p>\n
6. Ju e keni tepruar, ajo po qan…
\na. Ju vjen keq dhe k\u00ebrkoni falje.
\nb. I premtoni se do t\u00eb b\u00ebni gjith\u00e7ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb shlyer gabimin.
\nc. I blini nj\u00eb tuf\u00eb t\u00eb madhe me lule.
\nd. Mendoni se e ka merituar.<\/p>\n
7. Grindeni n\u00eb diskotek\u00eb me t\u00eb dashurin. Ju:
\na. Q\u00ebndroni pa l\u00ebvizur n\u00eb karrigen tuaj, gjith\u00eb mbr\u00ebmjen.
\nb. Merrni nj\u00eb pamje t\u00eb trishtuar, q\u00eb ai\/ajo t\u00eb vij\u00eb t\u2019ju ngush\u00eblloj\u00eb.
\nc. K\u00ebrceni n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb sensuale me t\u00eb gjith\u00eb n\u00eb pist\u00eb
\nd. Niseni pa th\u00ebn\u00eb asgj\u00eb: Ai\/ajo do t\u00eb kthehet vet\u00ebm n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi.<\/p>\n
8. Ju donit ta blinit at\u00eb vetur\u00eb, por nj\u00eb bler\u00ebs tjet\u00ebr \u00ebsht\u00eb atje, gati p\u00ebr t\u00eb firmosur:
\na. Shpresoni q\u00eb bler\u00ebsit tjet\u00ebr t\u2019i kthehet mendja
\nb. T\u00ebrhiqni shit\u00ebsin m\u00ebnjan\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb folur me t\u00eb.
\nc. Merrni nj\u00eb pamje t\u00eb trishtuar, p\u00ebr ta b\u00ebr\u00eb shit\u00ebsin t\u00eb ndjej\u00eb keqardhje.
\nd. B\u00ebni pazar, p\u00ebr ta bler\u00eb pak m\u00eb shtrenjt\u00eb.<\/p>\n
9. Keni t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb duroni:
\na. T\u00eb ndjeni keqardhje
\nb. T\u00eb mos ju d\u00ebgjojn\u00eb
\nc. T\u00eb mos ju v\u00ebn\u00eb re
\nd. T\u2019ju rezistojn\u00eb<\/p>\n
10. Gjat\u00eb nj\u00eb mbr\u00ebmjeje, nj\u00eb i ftuar flet p\u00ebr nj\u00eb tem\u00eb q\u00eb ju e njihni mir\u00eb. Ajo q\u00eb thot\u00eb, nuk ju duket shum\u00eb e sakt\u00eb:
\na. E lini t\u00eb qet\u00eb, t\u00eb shijoj\u00eb or\u00ebn e tij t\u00eb lavdis\u00eb.
\nb. Thoni: \u201cN\u00ebse keni nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr detaje, m\u00eb pyesni mua!\u201d
\nc. Prisni q\u00eb ai t\u00eb mbaroj\u00eb, p\u00ebr t\u00eb treguar versionin tuaj.
\nd. Talleni me t\u00eb pas \u00e7do fraze.<\/p>\n
Rezultatet
\nN\u00ebse keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb a. Jeni shum\u00eb i\/e sinqert\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb manipuluar
\nP\u00ebrgjigjet tuaja d\u00ebshmojn\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb xhentilese dhe mir\u00ebkuptimi q\u00eb ju pengon t\u00eb doni t\u00eb dominoni tjetrin. Ju nuk komplotoni p\u00ebr t\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb fjal\u00ebn e fundit ose p\u00ebr t\u00eb imponuar vizionin tuaj p\u00ebr bot\u00ebn. P\u00ebrkundrazi, dukeni njeri i kujdessh\u00ebm, i gatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur njer\u00ebzit q\u00eb ju rrethojn\u00eb, bile nganj\u00ebher\u00eb, me tepri. Kini kujdes se mos bini pre e manipuluesve t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm. Natyra juaj bujare mund t\u2019i nxis\u00eb ata t\u00eb p\u00ebrfitojn\u00eb prej jush. N\u00ebse jeni shpesh viktim\u00eb e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve me forc\u00eb, do t\u00eb ishte mir\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebrkonit shkakun. Mbase ju mungon siguria n\u00eb vetvete. Keni frik\u00eb se mos ju gjykojn\u00eb apo mos l\u00ebndoni t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt? N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast, ju m\u00eb mir\u00eb l\u00ebshoni pe, sesa t\u00eb detyroheni t\u00eb hyni n\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrballje q\u00eb do t\u2019ju destabilizonte edhe m\u00eb shum\u00eb.
\nAt\u00ebhere, n\u00ebse ju ndodh t\u00eb jeni i\/e l\u00ebnduar, ose t\u00eb ndjeheni fajtor\/e, identifikoni vlerat tuaja dhe afirmoni pik\u00ebv\u00ebshtrimin tuaj. Dhe, n\u00ebse kjo loj\u00eb e vog\u00ebl vazhdon, shprehuni hapur, duke treguar mosaprovimin tuaj. Thuajuni bashk\u00ebbiseduesve tuaj se secili ka t\u00eb drejt\u00eb t\u00eb mendoj\u00eb ndryshe. Kjo do t\u2019ju ndihmoj\u00eb t\u00eb zhvilloni vet\u00ebvler\u00ebsimin, gj\u00eb q\u00eb do t\u2019ju lejoj\u00eb t\u00eb krijoni marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie m\u00eb t\u00eb sh\u00ebndetshme dhe m\u00eb me vler\u00eb.<\/p>\n
N\u00ebse keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb b. Abuzoni vet\u00ebm kur nuk keni rrug\u00ebzgjidhje tjet\u00ebr
\nJu nuk keni karakteristikat e nj\u00eb manipuluesi t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Sigurisht, ju ndodh t\u00eb p\u00ebrdorni ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb disa strategji. K\u00ebshtu, ka momente kur i b\u00ebni thirrje joshjes, ose komplimenteve. K\u00ebto jan\u00eb q\u00ebndrime t\u00eb shpeshta te shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz! Megjithat\u00eb, mund t\u2019ju ndodh\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrdorni edhe manovra dhe truke p\u00ebr t\u2019ia hedhur partnerit\/es. K\u00ebto jan\u00eb metodat e fundit q\u00eb i p\u00ebrdorni nganj\u00ebher\u00eb kur t\u00eb tjerat nuk kan\u00eb dh\u00ebn\u00eb rezultat. Pa dyshim, e keni t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb mos i plot\u00ebsoni vetes t\u00eb gjitha d\u00ebshirat… Do t\u00eb ishte mir\u00eb t\u00eb pranonit se nuk mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb k\u00ebshtu. Sepse, kur i kap\u00ebrceni kufijt\u00eb, sjellja juaj rrezikon t\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjej\u00eb, ose t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsoj\u00eb bashk\u00ebbiseduesin tuaj. P\u00ebr fat t\u00eb mir\u00eb, ju duket se nd\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsoheni p\u00ebr teprimet tuaja dhe n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, k\u00ebrkoni falje. Megjithat\u00eb, do t\u00eb ishte mir\u00eb t\u00eb silleni n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrmbajtur. P\u00ebrpiquni t\u00eb sqaroni mir\u00eb q\u00ebllimet tuaja. P\u00ebr shembull, kur nuk ia arrini q\u00ebllimit tuaj, riformulojeni k\u00ebrkes\u00ebn duke u munduar t\u00eb jeni sa m\u00eb t\u00eb qart\u00eb q\u00eb mundeni dhe t\u00eb siguroheni se personi ju ka kuptuar mir\u00eb. Keni aft\u00ebsi t\u00eb arrini at\u00eb q\u00eb d\u00ebshironi pa u b\u00ebr\u00eb presion t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve.<\/p>\n
N\u00ebse keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb c. Ju luani me joshjen tuaj
\nMbase ju nuk jeni i\/e nd\u00ebrgjegjsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr fuqin\u00eb tuaj manipuluese, por sido q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb, e shfryt\u00ebzoni me mjesht\u00ebri! Arma juaj fatale \u00ebsht\u00eb joshja. Ndjeni k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsi kur i t\u00ebrhiqni v\u00ebmendjen bashk\u00ebbiseduesit tuaj p\u00ebr ta nxitur q\u00eb t\u2019ju jap\u00eb t\u00eb drejt\u00eb. N\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, e arrini leht\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb d\u00ebshironi, sepse dini t\u00eb krijoni nj\u00eb klim\u00eb besimi dhe t\u00eb jeni bind\u00ebs\/e. Ka momente kur k\u00ebrkoni pre t\u00eb reja q\u00eb mund t\u00eb k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsin d\u00ebshirat tuaja dhe nganj\u00ebher\u00eb, i mahnisni t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt vet\u00ebm q\u00eb t\u2019ju vler\u00ebsojn\u00eb. Megjithat\u00eb, kujdes se mos e teproni! Duke u p\u00ebrpjekur me \u00e7do kusht t\u00eb tregoni an\u00ebn tuaj josh\u00ebse, rrezikoni t\u00eb mos tregoni vlerat tuaja t\u00eb v\u00ebrteta. Me kalimin e koh\u00ebs, t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt mund t\u00eb lodhen nga manovrat tuaja dhe ju mund t\u00eb gjendeni i\/e vetmuar… Do t\u00eb fitonit pik\u00eb n\u00ebse do ta tregoni veten ashtu si jeni n\u00eb realitet, pa lule e kordele. Tregohuni t\u00eb natyrsh\u00ebm q\u00eb imazhi juaj shoq\u00ebror t\u00eb pasqyroj\u00eb personalitetin tuaj. Pa dyshim, do t\u00eb ndjeheni m\u00eb t\u00eb qet\u00eb, sepse do t\u00eb ndjeheni n\u00eb p\u00ebrputhje me at\u00eb q\u00eb jeni n\u00eb realitet. Dhe, mos harroni se shtirja t\u00eb \u00e7on shpesh n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie sip\u00ebrfaq\u00ebsore. Duke ekspozuar an\u00ebn tuaj m\u00eb autentike, do t\u00eb nd\u00ebrtoni marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie m\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrteta dhe t\u00eb forta.<\/p>\n
N\u00ebse keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb d. Ju keni d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb keni gjith\u00e7ka n\u00ebn kontroll
\nIntuita juaj e thell\u00eb ju lejon t\u00eb perceptoni pikat e dob\u00ebta t\u00eb bashk\u00ebbiseduesve tuaj, gj\u00eb q\u00eb ju b\u00ebn t\u00eb prekni zonat e ndjeshme t\u00eb gjithsecilit. K\u00ebshtu, p\u00ebr t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn situat\u00eb, sjellja juaj mund t\u00eb ndryshoj\u00eb sipas personit q\u00eb gjendet p\u00ebrball\u00eb jush. Ka momente q\u00eb luani rolin e viktim\u00ebs, n\u00eb t\u00eb tjera ju ndodh t\u00eb b\u00ebni kritika l\u00ebnduese ose t\u00eb k\u00ebrc\u00ebnoni, si: T\u00eb ndaheni, t\u00eb braktisni gjith\u00e7ka, etj. \u00cbsht\u00eb e ligjshme t\u00eb provosh shum\u00eb dredhi kur do t\u2019ia arrish nj\u00eb q\u00ebllimi, por kjo gj\u00eb nuk duhet b\u00ebr\u00eb n\u00eb d\u00ebm t\u00eb njer\u00ebzve q\u00eb ju rrethojn\u00eb! At\u00ebhere, n\u00ebse s\u2019e frenoni dot veten p\u00ebr t\u00eb abuzuar ndaj t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve, k\u00ebrkoni origjin\u00ebn e k\u00ebtij mekanizmi mbrojtjeje n\u00eb edukimin tuaj. Ka mund\u00ebsi q\u00eb prind\u00ebrit tuaj t\u00eb jen\u00eb thyer leht\u00eb p\u00ebrball\u00eb shantazheve tuaj. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast, ju nuk keni m\u00ebsuar t\u00eb respektoni limitet dhe keni menduar se me forc\u00ebn e bindjes, mund t\u00eb arrini gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb doni.
\n\u00cbsht\u00eb paradoksale, por ju fshihni thell\u00eb brenda vetes nj\u00eb munges\u00eb sigurie. Do t\u00eb ishte mir\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebnit pun\u00eb me veten p\u00ebr t\u00eb rritur vet\u00ebvler\u00ebsimin. M\u00ebnyra juaj e komunikimit, pa dyshim, do t\u00eb transformohet dhe k\u00ebshtu do t\u00eb ndjeheni m\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur ju dhe njer\u00ebzit q\u00eb ju rrethojn\u00eb.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Q\u00eb n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb njom\u00eb, ne m\u00ebsojm\u00eb m\u00ebnyra t\u00eb ndryshme p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur d\u00ebshirat tona. Edhe kur ishim bebe, arrinim t\u00eb merrnim at\u00eb q\u00eb donim, fal\u00eb t\u00eb qarave apo buz\u00ebqeshjeve. Tani, n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb rritur, ne p\u00ebrdorim nganj\u00ebher\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat manovra p\u00ebr t\u00eb bindur t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt: Joshjen, zbutjen, zem\u00ebrimin, etj. Megjithat\u00eb, ka edhe njer\u00ebz q\u00eb […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3523","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-test"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3523","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3523"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3523\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3523"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3523"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3523"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}