{"id":22145,"date":"2019-04-18T20:00:21","date_gmt":"2019-04-18T18:00:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/?p=22145"},"modified":"2019-04-18T11:59:56","modified_gmt":"2019-04-18T09:59:56","slug":"%ef%bb%bf10-rregulla-qe-shpetojne-martesen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/2019\/04\/%ef%bb%bf10-rregulla-qe-shpetojne-martesen\/","title":{"rendered":"\ufeff10 rregulla q\u00eb shp\u00ebtojn\u00eb martes\u00ebn"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I ke par\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb me admirim prind\u00ebrit e tu, duke d\u00ebshiruar q\u00eb edhe ti t\u00eb kishe nj\u00eb martes\u00eb dhe nj\u00eb mir\u00ebkuptim si i tyri?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si mund t\u2019ia arrish k\u00ebsaj? <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si mund t\u00eb jetosh me nj\u00eb njeri 50 vjet apo m\u00eb shum\u00eb? Cili \u00ebsht\u00eb sekreti i nj\u00eb martese jet\u00ebgjat\u00eb? <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ju, q\u00eb jeni t\u00eb fejuar, sa shpesh keni d\u00ebgjuar\nfraza t\u00eb tipit: \u201cMos u marto, je ende n\u00eb koh\u00eb!\u201d, \u201cJe i\/e \u00e7mendur q\u00eb do t\u00eb\nmartohesh?\u201d, ose \u201cShp\u00ebto sa je n\u00eb koh\u00eb!\u201d? Mbase jua kan\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb si me shaka, por\njan\u00eb afirmime t\u00eb shpeshta nga ata q\u00eb kan\u00eb vite t\u00eb martuar, tashm\u00eb. Kjo ndodh\nsepse jeta n\u00eb \u00e7ift nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb tr\u00ebndelin\u00eb e k\u00ebng\u00eb. Nj\u00eb moment je duke u puthur\ndhe momentin tjet\u00ebr grindesh p\u00ebr programin e televizorit q\u00eb do t\u00eb shikoni, apo\npse i ka hedhur rrobat sa andej-k\u00ebndej. Mjafton pak gj\u00eb dhe ekuilibri prishet.\nAt\u00ebhere, si ta b\u00ebsh nj\u00eb martes\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb funksionoj\u00eb? Cilat jan\u00eb rregullat baz\u00eb p\u00ebr\nt\u00eb pasur jet\u00ebgjat\u00ebsi? Ne  i kemi k\u00ebrkuar\nseksologes dhe terapeutes s\u00eb \u00e7iftit, Fran\u00e7eska Romana Tiberi, t\u00eb na tregoj\u00eb 10\nrregullat baz\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb funksionoj\u00eb nj\u00eb lidhje bashk\u00ebshortore dhe ja n\u00eb cilat p\u00ebrfundime\nkemi arritur…<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Partneri \u00ebsht\u00eb familja jote e re<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nuk duhet t\u00eb ekzistoj\u00eb askush tjet\u00ebr p\u00ebrve\u00e7 tij; partneri\/ja ka prioritetin\nabsolut. Me nj\u00eb fjal\u00eb, lini n\u00eb plan t\u00eb dyt\u00eb prind\u00ebrit, vjehrr\u00ebn dhe vjehrrin,\nmotrat, v\u00ebllez\u00ebrit dhe kunet\u00ebrit. Mos i sillni nd\u00ebrmend m\u00ebsimet dhe fjal\u00ebt e\ntyre as brenda, as jasht\u00eb shtratit. Q\u00eb tani e tutje, ekzistoni vet\u00ebm ju t\u00eb dy,\nme interesat tuaja, idet\u00eb dhe m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn tuaj p\u00ebr t\u00eb menaxhuar \u00e7iftin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Mos e mbani televizorin n\u00eb dhom\u00ebn e gjumit<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mund t\u00eb duket k\u00ebshill\u00eb e pazakont\u00eb, por \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb mir\u00eb t\u00eb evitoni shqet\u00ebsimet\ne jashtme n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb dhom\u00eb. Duket banale, por televizori \u00ebsht\u00eb shpesh arsye\ngrindjeje, p\u00ebr shkak se \u00e7far\u00eb doni t\u00eb shihni, volumit, etj. Dhoma e gjumit \u00ebsht\u00eb\ndhoma e komunikimit, e dialogut dhe e intimitetit. Shfryt\u00ebzojeni at\u00eb pak koh\u00eb q\u00eb\nju ngelet para gjumit p\u00ebr t\u00eb biseduar, p\u00ebr t\u2019u afruar apo p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb dashuri.\nIntimiteti do t\u00eb shtohet edhe jasht\u00eb k\u00ebsaj dhome. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Mos u grindni n\u00eb dhom\u00ebn e gjumit<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mos i lini z\u00ebnkat p\u00ebr n\u00eb shtrat. Meq\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb dhoma e intimitetit, ajo nuk\nduhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrdhoset me m\u00ebrira dhe fjal\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebqija. N\u00ebse duhet t\u00eb grindeni, m\u00eb\nmir\u00eb b\u00ebjeni n\u00eb nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb tjet\u00ebr t\u00eb sht\u00ebpis\u00eb dhe pastaj, b\u00ebni paqe n\u00eb dhom\u00ebn e\ngjumit. Sekreti thelb\u00ebsor q\u00eb nj\u00eb lidhje t\u00eb zgjas\u00eb, \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mos shkoni n\u00eb\nshtrat t\u00eb zem\u00ebruar me nj\u00ebri-tjetrin. Me kalimin e koh\u00ebs, kjo d\u00ebmton lidhjen dhe\ne transformon zem\u00ebrimin e momentit n\u00eb m\u00ebri. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Krijoni momente vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr \u00e7iftin<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00eb nj\u00eb jet\u00eb t\u00eb sh\u00ebndetshme n\u00eb \u00e7ift, duhet t\u00eb jeni t\u00eb aft\u00eb t\u00eb keni momente\nvet\u00ebm p\u00ebr ju t\u00eb dy, raste t\u00eb shenjta, n\u00eb t\u00eb cilat duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqeni t\u00eb merrni\npjes\u00eb, p\u00ebr shembull, t\u00eb hani m\u00ebngjesin e s\u00eb diel\u00ebs s\u00eb bashku, pic\u00ebn t\u00eb premten\nn\u00eb dark\u00eb, etj. Krijimi i nj\u00eb rituali ndihmon p\u00ebr t\u2019i dh\u00ebn\u00eb nj\u00eb identitet \u00e7iftit,\np\u00ebr t\u00eb mos e l\u00ebn\u00eb pas dore n\u00eb rutin\u00ebn e jet\u00ebs s\u00eb p\u00ebrditshme.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. Respektoni hap\u00ebsirat e tjetrit<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si\u00e7 \u00ebsht\u00eb e shenjt\u00eb t\u00eb kaloni momente t\u00eb bashku, po aq e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme \u00ebsht\u00eb\nq\u00eb secili t\u00eb ruaj\u00eb interesat dhe pasionet e veta, hap\u00ebsira n\u00eb t\u00eb cilat tjetri mund\nt\u00eb marr\u00eb pjes\u00eb dhe t\u2019i ndaj\u00eb me ty, por ku nuk duhet t\u00eb nd\u00ebrhyj\u00eb. Kujtohu q\u00eb\nmartesa nuk i ndryshon njer\u00ebzit. N\u00ebse je dashuruar me t\u00eb kur ishte tifoz i\ntmerrsh\u00ebm i Tiran\u00ebs dhe shkonte n\u00eb stadium, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e drejt\u00eb t\u2019i k\u00ebrkosh t\u00eb\nheq\u00eb dor\u00eb vet\u00ebm se tani mban n\u00eb gisht nj\u00eb unaz\u00eb. Martesa nuk i ndryshon e as i rregullon\nnjer\u00ebzit. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. Mos u martoni p\u00ebr arsye t\u00eb tjera, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 d\u00ebshir\u00ebs\np\u00ebr t\u2019u martuar<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nj\u00eb martes\u00eb e b\u00ebr\u00eb nga nevoja, p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt sepse ke mbetur\nshtatz\u00ebn\u00eb, p\u00ebr t\u2019i dh\u00ebn\u00eb nj\u00eb kuptim lidhjes apo sepse \u201ctani ka adhur momenti!\u201d,\nnuk do t\u00eb ket\u00eb jet\u00eb t\u00eb gjat\u00eb. Martohesh sepse ke d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb martohesh, se e do\ntjetrin dhe sepse beson n\u00eb hapin q\u00eb ke p\u00ebr t\u00eb hedhur; nuk ekzistojn\u00eb arsye t\u00eb\ntjera. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

7. Respektoni gjithmon\u00eb rolet n\u00eb \u00e7ift<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

P\u00ebrtej aspektit ekonomik, mendoj se duhet t\u00eb rikthehet n\u00eb mod\u00eb th\u00ebnia: \u201cBurri\nduhet t\u00eb mbaj\u00eb veshur pantallonat\u201d. Ekzistojn\u00eb detyra dhe funksione q\u00eb i takojn\u00eb\ns\u00eb pari burrit dhe t\u00eb tjera, q\u00eb i takojn\u00eb gruas. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb drejtim, baballar\u00ebt\ntan\u00eb kan\u00eb shum\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb na m\u00ebsuar. \u00cbsht\u00eb shum\u00eb e bezdisshme p\u00ebr burrin n\u00ebse ka n\u00eb\nkrah nj\u00eb grua q\u00eb vendos vet\u00eb dhe komandon p\u00ebr gjith\u00e7ka. Kjo, me kalimin e koh\u00ebs,\nmund t\u00eb shkaktoj\u00eb \u00e7arje t\u00eb pariparueshme p\u00ebr \u00e7iftin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. F\u00ebmij\u00ebt b\u00ebhen me vendim t\u00eb p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

F\u00ebmij\u00ebt duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebhen me vendim t\u00eb p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt, jo p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur tjetrin.\nPastaj, nuk mund t\u2019i programosh kur do vet\u00eb, nuk dihet se kur mund t\u00eb mbetesh\nshtatz\u00ebn\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

9. Kini t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat parime, vlera dhe ideale n\u00eb jet\u00eb<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

K\u00ebto p\u00ebrb\u00ebjn\u00eb baz\u00ebn e nj\u00eb individi dhe, q\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ift t\u00eb funksionoj\u00eb, duhet t\u00eb\nkeni t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat parime: Besnik\u00ebri, ndershm\u00ebri, respekt i tjetrit… K\u00ebto jan\u00eb\nvlera q\u00eb bashkojn\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ift, aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr n\u00ebse keni vendosur t\u00eb b\u00ebni f\u00ebmij\u00eb, p\u00ebr\nt\u00eb cil\u00ebt nevojitet medoemos t\u00eb vendoset nj\u00eb metod\u00eb edukimi e p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt dhe pa\nkeqkuptime, p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos krijuar v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi n\u00eb m\u00ebsimin e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10. Seksualiteti nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb thjesht nj\u00eb aksesor<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00eb shtrat, matet af\u00ebrsia e nj\u00eb \u00e7ifti dhe mund t\u00eb parashikohet edhe e\nardhmja. Pak\u00ebnaq\u00ebsia e zhg\u00ebnjimi, shkaktojn\u00eb ndarjen n\u00eb 90% t\u00eb \u00e7ifteve t\u00eb\ndivorcuara. Edhe k\u00ebtu nuk mendojm\u00eb se martesa ka shkopin magjik p\u00ebr t\u00eb\nrregulluar moskuptimin e mir\u00eb n\u00eb shtrat. N\u00ebse n\u00eb fillim t\u00eb lidhjes ky ka qen\u00eb\njo i mir\u00eb, me kalimin e koh\u00ebs, mund t\u00eb p\u00ebrkeq\u00ebsohet. Nj\u00eb rregull tjet\u00ebr: Mos i\nn\u00ebnvler\u00ebsoni problemet e lidhura me seksin. R\u00ebnia e d\u00ebshir\u00ebs, problemet me\nereksionin dhe ejakulimi i parakohsh\u00ebm, duhen p\u00ebrballuar menj\u00ebher\u00eb me ndihm\u00ebn e\nnj\u00eb specialisti, p\u00ebr t\u00eb rigjetur mir\u00ebkuptimin n\u00eb shtrat dhe qet\u00ebsin\u00eb n\u00eb \u00e7ift.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I ke par\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb me admirim prind\u00ebrit e tu, duke d\u00ebshiruar q\u00eb edhe ti t\u00eb kishe nj\u00eb martes\u00eb dhe nj\u00eb mir\u00ebkuptim si i tyri? Si mund t\u2019ia arrish k\u00ebsaj? Si mund t\u00eb jetosh me nj\u00eb njeri 50 vjet apo m\u00eb shum\u00eb? Cili \u00ebsht\u00eb sekreti i nj\u00eb martese jet\u00ebgjat\u00eb? Ju, q\u00eb jeni t\u00eb fejuar, sa shpesh […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":22146,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[50],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22145","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-intimitet"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22145","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22145"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22145\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/22146"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22145"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22145"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22145"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}