Sot jam nj\u00eb grua 55 vje\u00e7are, e kompletuar nga ana ekonomike, por brengat shpirt\u00ebrore q\u00eb kam kaluar n\u00eb rinin\u00eb time, nuk mundem t\u2019i harroj.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Isha vet\u00ebm 16 vje\u00e7e kur njoha dashurin\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Un\u00eb jetoja n\u00eb nj\u00eb fshat af\u00ebr Beratit dhe familja jon\u00eb ishte e varf\u00ebr, ashtu si shum\u00eb t\u00eb tjera n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Komshinj me familjen ton\u00eb kishim nga ata njer\u00ebz q\u00eb partia i quante me p\u00ebrb\u00ebrje t\u00eb \u201ckeqe\u201d. N\u00eb familjen time flitej shum\u00eb keq p\u00ebr ta, pasi nj\u00ebri nga djemt\u00eb e asaj familjeje ishte arratisur n\u00eb Amerik\u00eb. Si t\u00eb thuash, familja e tyre ishte si nj\u00eb tabu p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb fshatin, asnj\u00eb nuk i donte e as nuk i p\u00ebrkrahte. N\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, un\u00eb isha nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb shum\u00eb e bukur, shum\u00eb \u00e7apk\u00ebne dhe m\u00eb p\u00eblqente rreziku. Nj\u00ebrin p\u00ebr djemve t\u00eb asaj familjeje e kisha njohur n\u00eb nj\u00eb nga mbledhjet q\u00eb organizonte fshati n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb. Ai quhet Bujar dhe shpeshher\u00eb binte n\u00eb sy p\u00ebr m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn se si krihej e vishej dhe kjo gj\u00eb nuk i p\u00eblqente partis\u00eb, por mua, q\u00eb isha nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb adoleshente, m\u00eb p\u00eblqente shum\u00eb. Ai dukej si ata djemt\u00eb pak t\u00eb hedhur q\u00eb nuk kishin frik\u00eb nga asgj\u00eb. Kjo gj\u00eb e b\u00ebnte at\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00ebrheq\u00ebs, pavar\u00ebsisht se shum\u00eb vajza nuk i afroheshin, nga frika e llafeve. Ai i kishte mbushur gati t\u00eb tridhjetat dhe nuk ishte fejuar akoma, pasi k\u00ebto familje e kishin t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebnin miq\u00ebsi. N\u00eb nj\u00eb nga mbledhjet e radh\u00ebs q\u00eb organizonte organizata baz\u00eb e rinis\u00eb s\u00eb asaj kohe, ai u kritikua shum\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00eb p\u00ebr faktin se i mbante flok\u00ebt e gjata mbi vesh. P\u00ebr mua, ky ishte thjesht nj\u00eb justifikim q\u00eb nxirrte partia p\u00ebr ta kritikuar para t\u00eb gjith\u00ebve. T\u00eb gjith\u00eb e shikonin Bujarin me urrejtje, kurse un\u00eb e shikoja me dhembshuri. Edhe ai e kishte kuptuar nj\u00eb gj\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb, madje n\u00eb at\u00eb mbledhje nuk m\u2019i ndante syt\u00eb p\u00ebr asnj\u00eb sekond\u00eb. Teksa t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt diskutonin, ne shikoheshim n\u00eb fsheht\u00ebsi. Kot nuk thon\u00eb se gj\u00ebja e ndaluar t\u00eb t\u00ebrheq m\u00eb shum\u00eb. Q\u00eb prej asaj mbledhjeje, gj\u00ebrat kishin ndryshuar p\u00ebr mua. Gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebn dhe nat\u00ebn mendoja vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb. \u201cVall\u00eb, po ai, a mendon p\u00ebr mua?\u201d, thoja me veten time. Ishin dy gj\u00ebra q\u00eb na pengonin t\u00eb lidheshim: P\u00ebrb\u00ebrja e tij klasore dhe diferenca e mosh\u00ebs. Sikur babai im ta merrte vesh nj\u00eb gj\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb, do t\u00eb m\u00eb vriste, por kalonin dit\u00ebt dhe un\u00eb e vuaja dashurin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb. Ai m\u00eb dukej djali m\u00eb i bukur n\u00eb fshat dhe un\u00eb nuk kisha sy p\u00ebr t\u00eb tjer\u00eb. Gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebn rrija e mendoja se si do ta takoja. Fillova t\u00eb zija miq\u00ebsi me motr\u00ebn e tij dhe ashtu, si padashur, m\u00eb dilnin vet\u00eb pyetjet nga goja. Doja t\u00eb dija \u00e7do gj\u00eb p\u00ebr Bujarin, edhe pse nuk doja q\u00eb ajo ta kuptonte se un\u00eb e doja. Kjo iniciativa ime, ishte e rrezikshme, por nuk t\u00ebrhiqesha dot. Sa m\u00eb shum\u00eb mundohesha t\u2019i ndrydhja ndjenjat e mia ndaj tij, aq m\u00eb shum\u00eb m\u00eb shtoheshin ato. Me sa duket, interesi im p\u00ebr v\u00ebllain asaj i p\u00eblqeu shum\u00eb dhe nuk vonoi e nj\u00eb dit\u00eb m\u00eb drejtoi nj\u00eb let\u00ebr. U habita kur m\u00eb tha:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
– Merre, ta ka d\u00ebrguar Bujari!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Zemra po m\u00eb rrihte fort; ishte nj\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb q\u00eb nuk e\nkisha provuar m\u00eb par\u00eb. E habitur, e pyeta se pse m\u00eb kishte shkruar let\u00ebr, se \u00e7\u2019lidhje\nkishte letra e tij me mua. Ajo po qeshte dhe m\u00eb tha: <\/p>\n\n\n\n
– Ti lexoje nj\u00ebher\u00eb, sqarimet i ke t\u00eb gjitha brenda.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Edha doja, edhe s\u2019doja ta lexoja at\u00eb let\u00ebr,\nmegjithat\u00eb, d\u00ebshira p\u00ebr t\u00eb par\u00eb se \u00e7\u2019m\u00eb kishte shkruar ai ishte aq e madhe, sa\nnuk i rezistova dot. Kurr\u00eb nuk e kisha menduar se marrja e asaj letre do t\u00eb ishte\nnj\u00eb mallkim q\u00eb do t\u00eb m\u00eb ndiqte nga pas kudo. Shkova n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi dhe n\u00eb fsheht\u00ebsin\u00eb\nm\u00eb t\u00eb madhe, e lexova letr\u00ebn duke m\u2019u dridhur duart. Edhe sot kur e mendoj,\nthem: \u201cA ishin v\u00ebrtet t\u00eb sinqerta ato fjal\u00eb q\u00eb m\u00eb shkruante Bujari apo ishin\nthjesht nj\u00eb mjet shp\u00ebtimi, sikur t\u00eb isha e vetmja fem\u00ebr p\u00ebr t\u00eb mbi dh\u00e9?!\u201d. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fjal\u00ebt e tij m\u00eb emocionuan shum\u00eb. Ai m\u00eb shkruante se\nm\u00eb kishte par\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl teksa rritesha dhe q\u00ebkur un\u00eb isha f\u00ebmij\u00eb, ai kishte\nushqyer ndjenja p\u00ebr mua. \u201cMezi t\u00eb kam pritur q\u00eb ti t\u00eb rriteshe dhe t\u00eb b\u00ebheshe\nnusja ime\u201d, m\u00eb thoshte. Ai m\u00eb shkruante se gjithmon\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebngjes teksa hapte\ndritaren, mundohej t\u00eb m\u00eb shikonte teksa fshija oborrin e sht\u00ebpis\u00eb. M\u00eb thoshte\nse m\u00eb donte, se un\u00eb isha dashuria e tij e par\u00eb dhe e fundit. T\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto m\u00eb\nemociononin pa mas\u00eb. Letr\u00ebn e tij e mbaja gjithmon\u00eb me vete dhe fillova ta doja\ngjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb shum\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
K\u00ebshtu, nisi historia jon\u00eb, duke i shkruar nj\u00ebri\u2013tjetrit\ndhe motra e tij u b\u00eb postieri yn\u00eb. Nj\u00eb dit\u00eb kishim vendosur t\u00eb takoheshim.\nIshte ver\u00eb dhe un\u00eb u kisha th\u00ebn\u00eb njer\u00ebzve t\u00eb mi se do t\u00eb rrija te halla q\u00eb\nkishim n\u00eb fshat, por n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, shkova n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb e Bujarit. Njer\u00ebzit e\ntij kishin shkuar n\u00eb qytet sepse kishin nj\u00eb dasm\u00eb dhe Bujari i kishte\np\u00ebrgatitur shum\u00eb mir\u00eb gj\u00ebrat q\u00eb ta kalonim nat\u00ebn bashk\u00eb. Kisha filluar ta doja\naq shum\u00eb sa b\u00ebja \u00e7do gj\u00eb q\u00eb m\u00eb k\u00ebrkonte ai. Nuk e di pse, por as nga njer\u00ebzit e\nmi nuk kisha frik\u00eb. N\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, dashuria m\u00eb kishte verbuar komplet. Ishte nata e par\u00eb q\u00eb po rrija me Bujarin dhe\nkisha shum\u00eb frik\u00eb se si do t\u00eb rridhnin gj\u00ebrat m\u00eb von\u00eb. N\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, gj\u00ebra t\u00eb\ntilla nuk lejoheshin dhe ne kishim marr\u00eb nj\u00eb iniciativ\u00eb t\u00eb guximshme, por\ndashuria na jepte forc\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrballonim \u00e7do gj\u00eb, pa e ditur se \u00e7far\u00eb e ardhmje\nna priste. Sht\u00ebpia e Bujarit ishte e thjesht\u00eb, ashtu si\u00e7 ishin gati t\u00eb gjith\u00eb\nsht\u00ebpit\u00eb e fshatit n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, po mua nuk m\u00eb b\u00ebnin p\u00ebrshtypje orendit\u00eb e sht\u00ebpis\u00eb,\nve\u00e7 ajo q\u00eb po ndodhte midis nesh. Mbaj mend se Bujari m\u00eb rr\u00ebmbeu n\u00eb krah\u00eb dhe\nun\u00eb, e mbaja t\u00eb p\u00ebrqafuar shum\u00eb fort. Ai filloi t\u00eb m\u00eb puthte ngadal\u00eb n\u00eb faqe e m\u00eb\npas, n\u00eb buz\u00eb. Ndjehesha e p\u00ebrhumbur n\u00eb krah\u00ebt e tij dhe as q\u00eb i mendoja pasojat\nq\u00eb do t\u00eb kisha. E doja Bujarin marr\u00ebzisht dhe ajo nat\u00eb ishte aq magjike sa nuk\ngjej dot fjal\u00ebt p\u00ebr ta p\u00ebrshkruar. Iu dhash\u00eb e t\u00ebra atij, pa asnj\u00eb lloj\npendimi. E doja dhe kaq. Doja q\u00eb ajo nat\u00eb t\u00eb na lidhte p\u00ebrgjithmon\u00eb, por me\nkeqardhje ju them se ndodhi krejt\u00ebsisht e kund\u00ebrta. Halla ime u tregoi\nprind\u00ebrve se un\u00eb nuk kisha qen\u00eb n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb e saj at\u00eb nat\u00eb dhe, q\u00eb nga ai\nmoment, vet\u00ebm sherr kishte n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb ton\u00eb. Ata k\u00ebrkonin me ngulm t\u00eb m\u00ebsonin se\nku dhe me k\u00eb e kisha kaluar nat\u00ebn. Un\u00eb nuk guxoja t\u00eb tregoja. E dija se do t\u00eb\nshkat\u00ebrroja gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb kishim nd\u00ebrtuar me Bujarin. Edhe pse ishte nj\u00eb dashuri\ne ndaluar, ajo ishte nj\u00eb dashuri e bukur edhe sikur gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebn ta kalonim n\u00eb\nfsheht\u00ebsi, un\u00eb do ta pranoja. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Nuk u kisha treguar prind\u00ebrve p\u00ebr at\u00eb nat\u00eb deri n\u00eb\nmomentin kur kuptova se di\u00e7ka po ndodhte me trupin tim. E ndjeja veten t\u00eb\nlodhur, nuk m\u00eb hahej, madje disa her\u00eb m\u00eb kishte r\u00ebn\u00eb edhe t\u00eb fik\u00ebt. Prind\u00ebrit\nkishin filluar t\u00eb b\u00ebheshin merak dhe m\u00eb \u00e7uan n\u00eb spitalin e fshatit. Shum\u00eb\nshpejt, ata dhe un\u00eb bashk\u00eb, m\u00ebsuam se kisha mbetur shtatz\u00ebn\u00eb. Ajo ka qen\u00eb nj\u00eb\nnga dit\u00ebt m\u00eb t\u00eb tmerrshme t\u00eb jet\u00ebs sime! Nuk kisha \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb b\u00ebja, isha e detyruar t\u2019ua\ntregoja emrin e djalit q\u00eb doja. Prind\u00ebrve sa nuk u ra pika. Bujarin e denoncuan\np\u00ebr p\u00ebrdhunimin e nj\u00eb t\u00eb miture, edhe pse un\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00ebngulja q\u00eb nuk ishte k\u00ebshtu.\nAt\u00eb e fut\u00ebn n\u00eb burg, nd\u00ebrsa f\u00ebmij\u00ebn ma mor\u00ebn dhe ma \u00e7uan n\u00eb jetimore. Di vet\u00ebm\nse linda vajz\u00eb; asgj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. Vitet kaluan dhe un\u00eb nuk dija p\u00ebr k\u00eb t\u00eb qaja m\u00eb\npar\u00eb, p\u00ebr vajz\u00ebn q\u00eb ma rr\u00ebmbyen n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pam\u00ebshirshme apo p\u00ebr Bujarin, q\u00eb e\nfut\u00ebn n\u00eb burg p\u00ebr fajin tim. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
N\u00eb nj\u00eb pik\u00eb t\u00ebt jet\u00ebs, rrethanat m\u00eb detyruan q\u00eb edhe\nun\u00eb, si shum\u00eb vajza t\u00eb tjera, t\u00eb martohesha. Gabimi q\u00eb kisha b\u00ebr\u00eb nuk m\u00eb falej\ndhe e detyruar nga kushtet, u martova me nj\u00eb burr\u00eb q\u00eb kishte qen\u00eb i martuar dhe\ni kishte vdekur gruaja. Ai kishte nj\u00eb djal\u00eb q\u00eb e rrit\u00ebm bashk\u00eb, p\u00ebrkrah kat\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebve\nt\u00eb tjer\u00eb q\u00eb b\u00ebm\u00eb t\u00eb dy. Me ardhjen e demokracis\u00eb, f\u00ebmij\u00ebt emigruan jasht\u00eb shtetit\ndhe sot, ne kemi nj\u00eb nivel t\u00eb lart\u00eb jetese, por edhe pse jeta vazhdoi, ende\nzemr\u00ebn e kam t\u00eb plagosur p\u00ebr vajz\u00ebn q\u00eb nuk kam mundur ta gjej dot. Kam marr\u00eb\nvesh se Bujari u lirua nga burgu vet\u00ebm me ardhjen e demokracis\u00eb dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb\nmartuar n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb madhe. Kjo ishte drama e jet\u00ebs sime. Dashuria ime e par\u00eb e\nkuror\u00ebzuar me nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb, ishte nj\u00eb mallkim q\u00eb do t\u00eb m\u00eb ndjek\u00eb gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb\njet\u00ebs, nd\u00ebrsa vuaj sepse kurr\u00eb nuk e gjeta ku \u00ebsht\u00eb vajza ime… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Sot jam nj\u00eb grua 55 vje\u00e7are, e kompletuar nga ana ekonomike, por brengat shpirt\u00ebrore q\u00eb kam kaluar n\u00eb rinin\u00eb time, nuk mundem t\u2019i harroj. Isha vet\u00ebm 16 vje\u00e7e kur njoha dashurin\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Un\u00eb jetoja n\u00eb nj\u00eb fshat af\u00ebr Beratit dhe familja jon\u00eb ishte e varf\u00ebr, ashtu si shum\u00eb t\u00eb tjera n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb. Komshinj […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":20576,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[249],"class_list":["post-22060","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta","tag-histori"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22060","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22060"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22060\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20576"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22060"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22060"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22060"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}