Un\u00eb quhem Era dhe jam 34 vje\u00e7e. Punoj si menaxhere marketingu n\u00eb nj\u00eb kompani t\u00eb madhe. P\u00ebr shtat\u00eb vjet me radh\u00eb kam pasur nj\u00eb mardh\u00ebnie me Sazanin, nj\u00eb kolegun tim t\u00eb pun\u00ebs.<\/p>\n
Kur nisa lidhjen me t\u00eb, sapo i kisha dh\u00ebn\u00eb fund nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieje shum\u00eb t\u00eb lodhshme p\u00ebr mua, asaj me ish-bashk\u00ebshortin tim, Edin. Ai n\u00eb fillim ishte jasht\u00ebzakonisht i dashur dhe i \u00ebmb\u00ebl me mua, ndaj edhe pas gjasht\u00eb muajsh lidhjeje, vendos\u00ebm t\u00eb fejoheshim. P\u00ebr fiset tona, ne ishim \u00e7ifti perfekt. Ai punonte si avokat, nd\u00ebrsa un\u00eb isha menaxhere n\u00eb firm\u00eb. Kishim marr\u00eb sht\u00ebpi t\u00eb re me kursimet e tij dhe e kishim mobiluar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb shum\u00eb moderne. Ishim t\u00eb k\u00ebndsh\u00ebm, visheshim bukur dhe n\u00eb dukje, i kishim t\u00eb gjitha. N\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, fillimisht k\u00ebshtu ishte. Ne ftonim miqt\u00eb tan\u00eb p\u00ebr dreka e darka dhe po b\u00ebnim nj\u00eb jet\u00eb-mrekulli.<\/p>\n
Pas nj\u00eb viti, u martuam. Kjo qe edhe koha kur Edi nisi t\u00eb nxirrte kok\u00ebn. Vonohej dhe asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk e gjeja n\u00eb zyr\u00eb. Sa her\u00eb q\u00eb e pyesja ku shkonte, m\u00eb b\u00ebrtiste dhe m\u00eb kthehej duke m\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb se po e mbysja, se po tregohesha shum\u00eb kontrolluese n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e tij. N\u00eb fakt ai ishte nj\u00eb maskara q\u00eb e kalonte dit\u00ebn duke m\u00eb tradhtuar dhe nuk kishte asnj\u00eb lidhje t\u00eb q\u00ebndrueshme. E shihje gjithnj\u00eb me femra t\u00eb ndryshme. Doja ta ndryshoja k\u00ebt\u00eb situat\u00eb, duke i k\u00ebrkuar nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb, por as q\u00eb b\u00ebhej fjal\u00eb. P\u00ebr t\u00eb, at\u00ebsia ishte si nj\u00eb d\u00ebnim me vdekje. Sipas tij, duhet t\u00eb prisnim edhe disa vjet…<\/p>\n
Nga ana tjet\u00ebr, ishte shum\u00eb xheloz dhe analizonte \u00e7do gj\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time, q\u00eb nga \u00e7izmet e k\u00ebpuc\u00ebt q\u00eb vishja p\u00ebr n\u00eb pun\u00eb e deri te miqt\u00eb dhe shoqet me t\u00eb cilat pija kafen\u00eb. P\u00ebr k\u00ebto dhe shum\u00eb gj\u00ebra t\u00eb tjera, vendosa q\u00eb t\u00eb divorcohesha prej tij. Megjithat\u00eb, m\u2019u desh pak koh\u00eb p\u00ebr ta konceptuar veten time si nj\u00eb grua t\u00eb ndar\u00eb nga burri.<\/p>\n
Sazani ishte e kund\u00ebrta e Edit. Ai ishte miq\u00ebsor dhe shum\u00eb i dashur. N\u00eb pun\u00eb e donin q\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb. N\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, m\u2019u duk sikur Sazani ishte zgjedhja m\u00eb e mir\u00eb q\u00eb mund t\u00eb b\u00ebja. Ne ishim gjith\u00eb koh\u00ebs n\u00eb l\u00ebvizje, s\u00eb bashku. Shkonim n\u00eb firma t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb cilave u ofronim sh\u00ebrbimet tona, ndaj dhe u miq\u00ebsuam dhe e njoh\u00ebm me njeri-tjetrin n\u00eb nj\u00eb koh\u00eb t\u00eb shkurt\u00ebr.<\/p>\n
Shum\u00eb shpejt kuptova se ai kishte nisur t\u00eb m\u00eb p\u00eblqente. M\u00eb p\u00eblqente shikimi i tij dhe fakti q\u00eb fliste pa problem p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn e tij. Nj\u00eb pasdite, nd\u00ebrsa ecnim rrug\u00ebs p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00eb p\u00ebrcjell\u00eb n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb time, m\u00eb tha se mendonte se ai dhe gruaja e tij mund t\u00eb ndaheshin. M\u00eb tha se nuk e shtynte dot me t\u00eb. Papritmas, mendova se mund t\u00eb kisha nj\u00eb mund\u00ebsi me t\u00eb. Kur makina ndaloi, ai u afrua dhe m\u00eb puthi. Aty nisi gjith\u00e7ka…<\/p>\n
Kur kujtoj \u00e7far\u00eb mendoja m\u00eb par\u00eb, m\u00eb vjen n\u00eb mendje imazhi q\u00eb kisha p\u00ebr nj\u00eb dashnore. Nuk e di pse gjithnj\u00eb i imagjinoja t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosha, me flok\u00ebt shum\u00eb t\u00eb verdh\u00eb dhe me mustaqe t\u00eb pahequra. Kur ia thash\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb Sazanit, ai duke qeshur, m\u00eb tha se un\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb nuk isha thjesht nj\u00eb dashnore. Ndoshta d\u00ebshironte t\u00eb justifikonte lidhjen ton\u00eb…<\/p>\n
N\u00eb fillim, gjith\u00e7ka ishte e bukur. Un\u00eb isha shum\u00eb e dh\u00ebn\u00eb pas pun\u00ebs dhe karrier\u00ebs. Kisha nisur ta doja lirin\u00eb time. Me Sazanin ia kaloja shum\u00eb mir\u00eb, qeshja shum\u00eb dhe marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet seksuale ishin shum\u00eb t\u00eb fuqishme. Tani, kur e kthej kok\u00ebn prapa, mendoj se sa budallaqe kam qen\u00eb kur e prisja at\u00eb n\u00eb lulishte me or\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00ebra, apo kur vonohesha vet\u00ebm q\u00eb t\u00eb q\u00ebndronim n\u00eb zyr\u00eb t\u00eb dy. Ama, kjo lidhje ishte edhe shum\u00eb eksituese. Mendoj se n\u00eb t\u00eb pand\u00ebrgjegjshmen time, po mundohesha t\u2019i provoja atij se nuk isha si gruaja q\u00eb kishte n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi.<\/p>\n
Q\u00eb n\u00eb fillim, i kisha th\u00ebn\u00eb vetes se nuk do t\u00eb mendoja p\u00ebr gruan e tij. Sazi m\u00eb kishte th\u00ebn\u00eb se ata nuk b\u00ebnim m\u00eb seks bashk\u00eb, gj\u00eb q\u00eb un\u00eb e besoja. Me sa dukej, kryesorja p\u00ebr t\u00eb ishin f\u00ebmij\u00ebt. Un\u00eb k\u00ebnaqesha me t\u00eb p\u00ebr aq her\u00eb sa e takoja, por pas nj\u00eb viti q\u00eb rrinim s\u00eb bashku, nisa t\u00eb isha shum\u00eb n\u00eb ankth. Mendoja se kur do ta takoja her\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr. N\u00ebse ishte von\u00eb, merresha me idiot\u00ebsira, p\u00ebr shembull, i thosha vetes se pasi t\u00eb num\u00ebroja nj\u00ebzet makina, ai do t\u00eb shfaqej n\u00eb fund t\u00eb rrug\u00ebs. N\u00ebse ai vonohej m\u00eb shum\u00eb, bija shum\u00eb moralisht. E kuptova q\u00eb kisha r\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb dashuri me t\u00eb.<\/p>\n
T\u00eb them t\u00eb drejt\u00ebn, Sazi m\u00eb par\u00eb nuk m\u00eb kishte dh\u00ebn\u00eb asnj\u00eb shenj\u00eb p\u00ebr angazhimin e tij ndaj meje, por tani un\u00eb e doja di\u00e7ka t\u00eb till\u00eb. Nj\u00eb dit\u00eb shp\u00ebrtheva n\u00eb lot dhe e pyeta n\u00ebse do t\u00eb kishte m\u00eb shum\u00eb se kaq mes ne t\u00eb dyve. Ai m\u00eb tha q\u00eb un\u00eb isha nj\u00eb pjes\u00eb shum\u00eb e madhe e planeve p\u00ebr t\u00eb ardhmen e tij. U g\u00ebzova shum\u00eb sepse kur do dik\u00eb, nuk mund t\u00eb mos e besosh dhe t\u00eb mos shpresosh tek ato q\u00eb thot\u00eb, ndoshta edhe sepse nuk u kisha th\u00ebn\u00eb asgj\u00eb miqve t\u00eb mi, nuk kisha ask\u00ebnd q\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb sillte n\u00eb rrug\u00eb t\u00eb drejt\u00eb. Radari im q\u00eb kapte at\u00eb q\u00eb ishte e logjikshme apo jo, ishte prishur me koh\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb, n\u00eb at\u00eb periudh\u00eb Sazi shkoi me sh\u00ebrbim jasht\u00eb shtetit p\u00ebr dy jav\u00eb. Ka qen\u00eb nj\u00eb periudh\u00eb e tmerrshme. Ai m\u00eb mungonte jasht\u00eb mase. Kur u kthye, nuk ndryshoi asgj\u00eb. Sipas tij, ajo ishte nj\u00eb periudh\u00eb shum\u00eb e keqe p\u00ebr t\u2019i braktisur f\u00ebmij\u00ebt. N\u00eb fillim t\u00eb lidhjes son\u00eb un\u00eb isha e sigurt\u00eb n\u00eb vetvete dhe e pavarur, nd\u00ebrsa tani ndihesha e pafuqishme dhe e n\u00ebnvler\u00ebsoja veten time. Kur ia tregova nj\u00eb shoqes sime, ajo m\u00eb tha se duhet t\u00eb merrja n\u00eb duart e mia, timonin e jet\u00ebs sime. Mora nj\u00eb qen n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, duke shpresuar se ndoshta do t\u00eb ma hiqte mendjen nga ai, por e pamundur. Mezi prisja t\u00eb h\u00ebnat, q\u00eb do t\u00eb m\u00eb lejonin ta shihja n\u00eb zyr\u00eb. Nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb, justifikimet e tij p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos e l\u00ebn\u00eb familjen ndryshonin nga dita n\u00eb dit\u00eb. Ne grindeshim, ndaheshim dhe pastaj bashkoheshim prap\u00eb. E dija q\u00eb dashnoret asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk kan\u00eb fund t\u00eb lumtur, por un\u00eb shpresoja deri n\u00eb fund, derisa nj\u00eb dit\u00eb m\u00eb tha se nga fundi i vitit do t\u00eb jetonim s\u00eb bashku. S\u00ebrish prita, por kur kaloi dhjetori dhe hyri janari, e pash\u00eb q\u00eb ai as q\u00eb kishte nd\u00ebrmend ta linte ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb familjen e tij. E \u00e7ova n\u00eb djall dhe pastaj shkova e piva derisa u deha. T\u00eb nes\u00ebrmen m\u00eb p\u00ebrzihej, por jo vet\u00ebm nga pija. Me kalimin e koh\u00ebs, po merrja s\u00ebrish veten. Nd\u00ebrrova ngjyr\u00ebn e flok\u00ebve, lash\u00eb duhanin dhe u regjistrova n\u00eb palest\u00ebr.<\/p>\n
Tani, pasi kan\u00eb kaluar muaj, ende ndihem pak e turbullt kur e shoh n\u00eb zyr\u00eb, por pastaj m\u00eb kujtohet se sa shum\u00eb e kisha l\u00ebshuar veten, aq sa mendoja se ai ishte m\u00eb i r\u00ebnd\u00ebsish\u00ebm se un\u00eb. Nuk e mohoj se e doja shum\u00eb Sazanin. Me t\u00eb shpenzova shtat\u00eb vjet t\u00eb jet\u00ebs sime, por nuk doja t\u00eb shpenzoja edhe m\u00eb… M\u00eb von\u00eb ai u mundua t\u00eb m\u00eb k\u00ebrkonte t\u00eb falur, por un\u00eb i k\u00ebrkova t\u2019i jepte fund fjalimit dhe t\u00eb harronte gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb kishte ndodhur mes nesh. Tashm\u00eb e di se dy jan\u00eb fjalit\u00eb do mund t\u00eb d\u00ebgjosh gjithnj\u00eb nga nj\u00eb burr\u00eb i martuar: \u201cT\u00eb k\u00ebrkoj falje\u201d dhe \u201cM\u00eb duhet t\u00eb iki\u201d.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Un\u00eb quhem Era dhe jam 34 vje\u00e7e. Punoj si menaxhere marketingu n\u00eb nj\u00eb kompani t\u00eb madhe. P\u00ebr shtat\u00eb vjet me radh\u00eb kam pasur nj\u00eb mardh\u00ebnie me Sazanin, nj\u00eb kolegun tim t\u00eb pun\u00ebs. Kur nisa lidhjen me t\u00eb, sapo i kisha dh\u00ebn\u00eb fund nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieje shum\u00eb t\u00eb lodhshme p\u00ebr mua, asaj me ish-bashk\u00ebshortin tim, Edin. Ai […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[315,316,249],"class_list":["post-2180","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta","tag-dashnore","tag-dashuri","tag-histori"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2180","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2180"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2180\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2180"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2180"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2180"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}