\u201cN\u00eb Kosov\u00eb, vendin tim t\u00eb dashur, me t\u00eb cilin kam qen\u00eb kaq shum\u00eb krenar, nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 16 vje\u00e7are u p\u00ebrdhunua nga m\u00ebsuesi i shkoll\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme. Kur ajo m\u00eb n\u00eb fund pati guximin t\u00eb raportonte rastin n\u00eb stacionin e policis\u00eb, ajo p\u00ebrfundoi duke u shantazuar dhe abuzuar seksualisht nga oficeri i caktuar p\u00ebr rastin e saj p\u00ebr nj\u00eb periudh\u00eb t\u00eb gjat\u00eb kohore. Pak jav\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb, ajo mori veshse ishte shtatz\u00ebn\u00eb me f\u00ebmij\u00ebn e tij dhe u detyrua t\u00eb abortontej. Edhe pse ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb e mitur dhe prind\u00ebrit e saj nuk e kan\u00eb ditur, doktori n\u00eb klinik\u00eb ka realizuar abortin plot\u00ebsisht i vet\u00ebdijsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr faktin se ajo nuk ishte zgjedhja e saj. N\u00eb vendin tim n\u00ebse nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 16 vje\u00e7are e cila a) nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e virgj\u00ebr, b) \u00ebsht\u00eb shtatz\u00ebn\u00eb dhe c) nuk ishte e martuar para se ajo t\u00eb b\u00ebnte gjith\u00e7ka (edhe n\u00ebse nuk ishte zgjedhja e saj); konsiderohet turp. Dhe n\u00ebse k\u00ebto gj\u00ebra i ndodhin asaj, \u00ebsht\u00eb faji i saj. Grat\u00eb n\u00eb Kosov\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb shtypura. Un\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb them asgj\u00eb \u00a0ndryshe nga ajo q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. Ne na m\u00ebsohet t\u00eb mos flasim shum\u00eb ose me z\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb , sepse ‘hallki ti thejn hunt’ (‘burri yt \/ vjehrrit tuaj do t\u00eb rrahin ju n\u00ebse flisni pas tyre ose nuk u bindeni atyre), t\u00eb mos flasim kur burrat flasin, ata i din\u00eb t\u00eb gjitha (dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb e pahijshme t\u00eb mendosh se ti, nj\u00eb grua, di di\u00e7ka m\u00eb mir\u00eb apo m\u00eb shum\u00eb) p\u00ebr t\u00eb pastruar dhe gatuar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb q\u00eb vizitor\u00ebt t\u00eb shohin se je grua p\u00ebr sht\u00ebpi. Ne nuk u m\u00ebsojm\u00eb vajzave t\u00eb mendojn\u00eb, t\u00eb diskutojn\u00eb dhe ndjekin \u00ebndrrat e tyre. Ne nuk u m\u00ebsojm\u00eb atyre t\u00eb jen\u00eb ambicioze dhe t\u00eb provojn\u00eb gj\u00ebra t\u00eb reja. Ne vet\u00ebm \u00a0u m\u00ebsojm\u00eb se si t\u00eb jen\u00eb gra t\u00eb mira dhe sh\u00ebrb\u00ebtore t\u00eb mira. Do doja q\u00eb t\u00eb isha tronditur kur d\u00ebgjova p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb rast, por nuk ndodhi. Rritja ime n\u00eb nj\u00eb mjedis kosovar, madje edhe gjat\u00eb koh\u00ebs q\u00eb jetoj n\u00eb Belgjik\u00eb, ka b\u00ebr\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj p\u00ebr shum\u00eb raste t\u00eb abuzimit seksual. Sipas \u00a0atyre q\u00eb flasin p\u00ebr t\u00eb, ajo ishte gjithmon\u00eb viktim\u00eb e viktimave sepse ajo ndoshta flirtoi me t\u00eb, nuk ishte i veshur si duhet ose nuk ishte m\u00eb e virgj\u00ebr, k\u00ebshtu ajo e ka merituar at\u00eb. Askush nuk do ta merrte seriozisht at\u00eb gjithsesi, ose ata do t\u00eb faj\u00ebsojn\u00eb prind\u00ebrit, duke mos i m\u00ebsuar asaj se si t\u00eb sillet me burrat n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb q\u00eb ata t\u00eb mos krijoj\u00eb ide t\u00eb gabuara. \u00c7do vajz\u00eb kosovare e di se p\u00ebr \u00e7far\u00eb po flas dhe secila prej tyre e di se sa e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb kesh respektin e nj\u00eb njeriu pa u trajtuar si nj\u00eb objekt. M\u00eb vjen keq t\u00eb pranoj gjithmon\u00eb, sa vend i dob\u00ebt jemi. E di q\u00eb ky \u00a0nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb rasti i par\u00eb dhe sigurisht jo i fundit p\u00ebr nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebrdhunuar. Ju p\u00ebrpiqeni ta b\u00ebni at\u00eb t\u00eb duket sikur grat\u00eb marrin trajtim t\u00eb barabart\u00eb dhe m\u00eb shum\u00eb shanse, por e v\u00ebrteta \u00ebsht\u00eb se kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb e gjitha shfaqje, sho\u00eb. Kosova dhe udh\u00ebheq\u00ebsit e saj nuk jan\u00eb t\u00eb gatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr p\u00ebrparim, p\u00ebr t\u00eb ecur p\u00ebrpara, dhe kam frik\u00eb se nuk do t\u00eb jen\u00eb kurr\u00eb. Pra, sot ndjenjat e krenaris\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb mbuluara nga zhg\u00ebnjimi, trishtimi dhe zem\u00ebrimi. Ju i zhg\u00ebnjyet bijat tuaja!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/16-vjecarja.jpg\")
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n“In Kosovo, my beloved country who I\u2019ve always been so so proud of, a 16-year old girl was raped by her high school teacher. When she finally had the courage to report the case at the police station, she ended up being blackmailed and sexually abused by the policeman assigned to her case for a long period of time. A couple of weeks ago, she found out she was pregnant with his child and got forced into abortion. Even though she is a minor and her parents didn’t know, the doctor\u00a0at the clinic went through with the abortion fully aware of the fact that it wasn’t her choice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In my country having a 16-year old daughter who a) isn’t a virgin anymore, b) is pregnant and c) wasn’t married before she did all of that (even if it wasn’t her choice), is a shame. And if these things happen to her, it’s her own fault.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Women in Kosovo are oppressed. I’m not going to say it any different than it really is. We are taught not to speak too much or too loud because ‘hallki ti thejn hunt’ (‘your husband\/your in-laws will beat you if you talk back or don’t obey them), not to speak when men are speaking because they know it all (and it’s impolite to think that you, a woman, knows something better) to clean and cook so that visitors can see that you’re wife-material. We don’t teach girls to think, to discuss and follow their dreams. We don’t teach them to be ambitious and try new things. We only get taught how to be good wives and good hosts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I wish I was shocked to hear about this case but I’m not. Growing up in a Kosovan environment, even while living in Belgium, I heard about plenty of cases of sexual abuse. According to the people talking about it, it was always the victims fault because she probably flirted with him, wasn’t dressed properly or wasn’t a virgin to begin with so she kinda deserved it. Nobody would ever take her seriously anyway. Or they’d blame the parents, for not teaching her how to behave around men so that they wouldn’t get the wrong idea. Every Kosovan girl knows what I’m talking about and each one of them knows how hard it is to have a man’s respect without being treated as an object.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’m sorry to realize, every time, over and over again, how weak of a country you are. I know this isn’t the first and certainly not the last case about a girl who has been molested. You try to make it seem like women get equal treatment and more chances but the truth is that it’s all a show. Kosovo and her leaders are not ready for progression and I’m afraid they’ll never be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So today my feelings of pride are overshadowed by disappointment, sadness and anger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kosov\u00eb, you failed your own daughters.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Deniza Miftari, asambleistja shqiptare n\u00eb Belgjik\u00eb, nj\u00eb 23 vje\u00e7are nga Gjilani shpreh indinjat\u00ebn e thell\u00eb p\u00ebr rastin e Drenic\u00ebs dhe thot\u00eb se gabimi \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb n\u00eb gjenes\u00eb, se femrat e Kosov\u00ebs, m\u00ebsohen t\u2019i binden burrave, t\u00eb pastrojn\u00eb e lajn\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb, t\u00eb presin e t\u00eb p\u00ebrcjellin miq, mos u d\u00ebgjohet z\u00ebri i goj\u00ebs dhe t\u00eb mos […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":20982,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[2242],"class_list":["post-20980","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aktualitet","tag-deniza"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20980","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20980"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20980\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20982"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20980"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20980"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20980"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}