<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ve\u00e7antit\u00eb e\nkarakterit ose t\u00eb sjelljes, q\u00eb i bashkojn\u00eb n\u00eb fillim dy njer\u00ebz n\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ift, me\nkalimin e koh\u00ebs mund t\u00eb b\u00ebhen shkak mosmarr\u00ebveshjesh dhe konfliktesh. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb\ne leht\u00eb t\u00eb pranosh te partneri nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb sjelluri apo nj\u00eb t\u00eb met\u00eb, por\npothuajse gjithmon\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e nevojshme, madje e domosdoshme, p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar\nbashkarisht sa m\u00eb gjat\u00eb dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb lumtur. P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb k\u00ebrkohet nj\u00eb durim\ni madh nga t\u00eb dyja pal\u00ebt. \u201cPse qenka kaq e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb?\u201d, mund t\u00eb pyes\u00eb dikush. S\u00eb\npari, duhet mbajtur parasysh se n\u00eb themel t\u00eb \u00e7do bashkimi dhe dashurie,\nq\u00ebndrojn\u00eb ndryshimet q\u00eb shikojn\u00eb fillimisht partner\u00ebt te nj\u00ebri-tjetri.\nPik\u00ebrisht ato, vetit\u00eb dalluese nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt q\u00eb v\u00ebm\u00eb re te nj\u00ebri-tjetri n\u00eb\nfillim, na t\u00ebrheqin, na p\u00eblqejn\u00eb, na ngjallin kureshtjen p\u00ebr t\u2019u njohur sa m\u00eb\nmir\u00eb dhe na b\u00ebjn\u00eb t\u2019i dukemi nj\u00ebri-tjetrit krejt t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt. N\u00eb\nfakt, jo vet\u00ebm nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt, po edhe nga nj\u00ebri-tjetri…<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n T\u00eb jesh nj\u00ebsoj apo ndryshe?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz\ngabojn\u00eb duke menduar se jeta e nj\u00eb \u00e7ifti mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb e mbar\u00eb, kur ata nuk kan\u00eb\ndallime nga nj\u00ebri-tjetri, kur bien plot\u00ebsisht dakord n\u00eb mendime p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjitha\nproblemet e jet\u00ebs dhe nuk kan\u00eb kund\u00ebrshti. Duhet patur parasysh se, n\u00eb\np\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, ndjenja e dashuris\u00eb lind kur secili nga t\u00eb dy shikon dhe pranon se\nnj\u00ebri plot\u00ebson di\u00e7ka te tjetri, pra, kur t\u00eb dy bashk\u00eb plot\u00ebsojn\u00eb nj\u00ebri-tjetrin.\nPsikoterapeuti i d\u00ebgjuar, Robert Xhonson i quan k\u00ebto lidhje dhe k\u00ebt\u00eb bashkim,\n\u201cdashuri e pjekur\u201d. Pra, duam s\u2019duam ne, duhen pranuar ndryshimet q\u00eb kemi nga\nnj\u00ebri-tjetri dhe jo vet\u00ebm kaq, por duhen shikuar ato si faktor pozitiv q\u00eb\nndihmojn\u00eb n\u00eb forcimin e \u00e7iftit. Ve\u00e7 k\u00ebsaj, pik\u00ebrisht kjo ndihmon p\u00ebr ta par\u00eb\ntjetrin gjithmon\u00eb ashtu sikurse \u00ebsht\u00eb, pra, me t\u00eb mirat dhe mang\u00ebsit\u00eb e tij, me\nvirtytet dhe t\u00eb metat e tij. K\u00ebshtu, nj\u00ebkoh\u00ebsisht, njeh edhe veten, shikon n\u00ebse\nje n\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb bashk\u00ebjetosh me t\u00eb, t\u00eb shuash mosmarr\u00ebveshjet dhe konfliktet\nq\u00eb mund t\u00eb sjellin ndryshimet mes jush. Po sigurisht, as p\u00ebr gjith\u00e7ka nuk duhet\nt\u00eb jeni n\u00eb nj\u00eb mendje dhe as p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjitha nuk mund t\u00eb keni mendime t\u00eb\nkund\u00ebrta, sepse jeta mund t\u00eb kthehet n\u00eb nj\u00eb konflikt t\u00eb vazhduesh\u00ebm ose n\u00eb t\u00eb\nkund\u00ebrt\u00ebn, n\u00eb nj\u00eb rutin\u00eb q\u00eb sjell vet\u00ebm m\u00ebrzi. R\u00ebnd\u00ebsi ka q\u00eb p\u00ebr problemet\nkryesore dhe vlerat m\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme t\u00eb jet\u00ebs, ju t\u00eb merreni vesh mir\u00eb me\nnj\u00ebri-tjetrin. Dhe, pik\u00ebrisht k\u00ebtu q\u00ebndron v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsia. Pse? Sepse, s\u00eb pari,\nvler\u00ebsimi i vlerave nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i nj\u00ebllojt\u00eb te njer\u00ebzit dhe e dyta, vler\u00ebsimi i\ntyre gjat\u00eb jet\u00ebs mund t\u00eb ndryshoj\u00eb. Di\u00e7ka q\u00eb nj\u00ebrit prej partner\u00ebve i p\u00eblqente\nshum\u00eb dje, sot nuk i p\u00eblqen m\u00eb apo i shtyr\u00eb nga rrethanat e ndryshme t\u00eb jet\u00ebs,\ne ka marr\u00eb inat. Psikolog\u00ebt v\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb dukje se n\u00eb rast se pik\u00ebpamjet p\u00ebr gj\u00ebrat\nkryesore mes partner\u00ebsh jan\u00eb krejt\u00ebsisht t\u00eb kund\u00ebrta, at\u00ebhere e kan\u00eb t\u00eb\nv\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb krijojn\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie intime q\u00eb t\u00eb zgjatin shum\u00eb. Po at\u00ebher\u00eb? Si\nduhet vepruar?<\/p>\n\n\n\n S\u00eb pari, n\u00eb rast se\nmidis dy partner\u00ebve ka dashuri e respekt reciprok dhe duan t\u00eb bashkohen n\u00eb\n\u00e7ift, ata duhet t\u00eb mbyllin nj\u00eb sy e nj\u00eb vesh ndaj k\u00ebtij vler\u00ebsimi t\u00eb vlerave,\nduke e konsideruar si nj\u00eb t\u00eb met\u00eb t\u00eb partnerit. Pasi i njohin nj\u00ebri-tjetrit\npik\u00ebpamjet dhe d\u00ebshirat, \u00ebsht\u00eb mir\u00eb q\u00eb ata t\u00eb fillojn\u00eb t\u00eb krijojn\u00eb nj\u00eb vler\u00ebsim\nt\u00eb p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt t\u00eb vlerave t\u00eb jet\u00ebs, duke i b\u00ebr\u00eb l\u00ebshime reciproke nj\u00ebri-tjetrit.\nKur nuk e shohin veten n\u00eb gjendje p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb (sigurisht kur \u00ebsht\u00eb fjala p\u00ebr\ngj\u00ebrat thelb\u00ebsore dhe kryesore t\u00eb jet\u00ebs), \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb mir\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mos lidhen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Prandaj sociolog\u00ebt\ndhe psikolog\u00ebt u japin r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve brenda p\u00ebrbrenda \u00e7iftit, duke\nrekomanduar q\u00eb ata, para se t\u00eb quajn\u00eb nj\u00ebri-tjetrin \u201cgjysma ime\u201d, t\u00eb ken\u00eb\nforcuar mes nj\u00ebri-tjetrit ndjenj\u00ebn e shoq\u00ebris\u00eb dhe t\u00eb mir\u00ebsis\u00eb, t\u00eb jen\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb\nshok\u00eb e miq. Kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e leht\u00eb. Pse? S\u00eb pari, sepse ne e p\u00ebrfytyrojm\u00eb\nndjenj\u00ebn e dashuris\u00eb si nj\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb romantike plot pasione seksuale\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Xhon Hotmani,\nspecialist i d\u00ebgjuar p\u00ebr studimin e k\u00ebsaj sfere t\u00eb jet\u00ebs, pohon se baz\u00eb e\nfamiljeve t\u00eb lumtura \u00ebsht\u00eb pik\u00ebrisht miq\u00ebsia e pandar\u00eb. \u201cMarr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet miq\u00ebsore,\nthot\u00eb ai, i p\u00ebrshkon organikisht nj\u00eb \u201crrym\u00eb delikatese\u201d, q\u00eb ec\u00ebn krahas \u201crrym\u00ebs\nerotike\u201d dhe t\u00eb dyja bashk\u00eb, mbajn\u00eb gjall\u00eb familjen. Sa m\u00eb t\u00eb forta t\u00eb jen\u00eb\nthemelet e miq\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe af\u00ebrsis\u00eb shpirt\u00ebrore n\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ift, aq m\u00eb mir\u00eb i mbrojn\u00eb\npartner\u00ebt nga ndjenja t\u00eb tilla si xhelozia, rutina, etj. \u201cPor, edhe ndjenja e\nmiq\u00ebsis\u00eb duhet ruajtur\u201d, thot\u00eb ai dhe jep disa k\u00ebshilla p\u00ebr ta arritur k\u00ebt\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n 1. Kaloni s\u00eb bashku koh\u00ebn tuaj t\u00eb lir\u00eb<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Krijoni ritualin\ntuaj, duke kujtuar e kremtuar p\u00ebrvjetorin e njohjes, t\u00eb fejes\u00ebs, t\u00eb martes\u00ebs,\nmadje edhe t\u00eb \u201cgrindjes\u201d s\u00eb par\u00eb, e cila me humor e shaka mund t\u00eb ndihmoj\u00eb p\u00ebr\nt\u2019i hedhur pa t\u00eb keq nj\u00eb sy kritik gjith\u00eb rrug\u00ebn e p\u00ebrshkuar bashkarisht deri\ntani. Por kjo do t\u2019ju ndihmoj\u00eb q\u00eb ta respektoni m\u00eb shum\u00eb nj\u00ebri-tjetrin, t\u00eb\ntregoheni sa m\u00eb t\u00eb af\u00ebrt, t\u00eb dashur, delikat\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n N\u00eb forcimin e\nndjenj\u00ebs s\u00eb miq\u00ebsis\u00eb, themelit t\u00eb \u00e7do bashkimi n\u00eb \u00e7ift, vazhdon specialisti\nXhon Hotman, ndihmojn\u00eb shum\u00eb bashk\u00ebbisedimet tuaja. Heshtja, sidomos heshtjet e\ngjata, nuk jan\u00eb n\u00eb dobi t\u00eb jet\u00ebs familjare. Por kujdes, thekson ai, edhe fjal\u00ebt\ne shumta nuk ndihmojn\u00eb dhe gjat\u00eb bisedave, p\u00ebrpiquni m\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb tregoni p\u00ebr\nvete sesa t\u00eb kritikoni partnerin\u2026 <\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. <\/strong>Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet e rregullta seksuale<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Nj\u00eb faktor tjet\u00ebr\nq\u00eb, sipas specialist\u00ebve, ndihmon n\u00eb mbar\u00ebvajtjen e familjes, jan\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet\nseksuale. Ato nuk jan\u00eb vet\u00ebm \u201cnj\u00eb mjet\u201d p\u00ebr t\u00eb g\u00ebzuar k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsit\u00eb e jet\u00ebs, por\nedhe nj\u00eb mund\u00ebsi p\u00ebr ta zbuluar para partnerit vetveten n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn sa m\u00eb t\u00eb\nk\u00ebndshme, p\u00ebr t\u2019u afruar sa m\u00eb shum\u00eb. Duhet patur parasysh q\u00eb k\u00ebto marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie\nintime t\u00eb mos kalojn\u00eb n\u00eb rutin\u00eb, \u201csa p\u00ebr t\u00eb kaluar radh\u00ebn\u201d, por t\u00eb mbajn\u00eb\ngjithmon\u00eb n\u00eb vetvete at\u00eb t\u00ebrheqje magnetike q\u00eb ua ka dh\u00ebn\u00eb vet\u00eb natyra, si\nmjeti kryesor p\u00ebr vazhdimin e llojit. T\u00eb mbahet i ndezur ky afsh edhe pasi\nkalojn\u00eb vitet\u2026 N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb pik\u00eb, seksolog\u00ebt\nnuk jan\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb mendje me psikolog\u00ebt dhe sociolog\u00ebt, q\u00eb pohojn\u00eb se p\u00ebr t\u00eb\nforcuar marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet familjare, p\u00ebr t\u00eb patur nj\u00eb familje t\u00eb lumtur, duhet\nq\u00ebndruar sa m\u00eb pran\u00eb nj\u00ebri-tjetrit, duhet ta kaloni bashkarisht gjith\u00eb koh\u00ebn e\nlir\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ata bashk\u00ebshort\u00eb,\nthon\u00eb seksolog\u00ebt, q\u00eb q\u00ebndrojn\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb s\u00eb bashku, shpesh nuk e shikojn\u00eb\nnj\u00ebri-tjetrin me syrin e partnerit seksual. \u201cAtyre u b\u00ebhet burri v\u00eblla dhe\ngruaja mot\u00ebr\u201d, qeshin ata. Seksologu francez Zhan\u2013Mishel Fitreman, rekomandon\nq\u00eb bashk\u00ebshort\u00ebt t\u00eb largohen nganj\u00ebher\u00eb nga nj\u00ebri-tjetri, por sidoqoft\u00eb, shton\nai, baz\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb fush\u00eb mbetet harmonia n\u00eb jet\u00ebn seksuale. Kjo harmoni vjen kur\npartner\u00ebt k\u00ebnaqin nj\u00ebri-tjetrin gjat\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve seksuale. Bashk\u00ebshort\u00ebt\n\u00ebsht\u00eb mir\u00eb t\u00eb flasin me nj\u00ebri-tjetrin p\u00ebr seksin, jo vet\u00ebm n\u00eb krevat. Kjo nuk\nmjafton. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb nga m\u00ebnyrat p\u00ebr t\u2019i mbajtur k\u00ebto marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie n\u00eb rendin e\ndit\u00ebs\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. Planet e p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebta<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Nj\u00eb faktor tjet\u00ebr\nq\u00eb forcon jet\u00ebn familjare dhe e b\u00ebn familjen t\u00eb lumtur jan\u00eb edhe planet dhe\n\u00ebndrrat e p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebta p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn e \u00e7iftit dhe t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve, pas lindjes s\u00eb tyre.\nBashk\u00ebshort\u00ebt duhet t\u00eb shikojn\u00eb qart\u00eb t\u00eb ardhmen e tyre dhe t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve t\u00eb\ntyre.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Ve\u00e7antit\u00eb e karakterit ose t\u00eb sjelljes, q\u00eb i bashkojn\u00eb n\u00eb fillim dy njer\u00ebz n\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7ift, me kalimin e koh\u00ebs mund t\u00eb b\u00ebhen shkak mosmarr\u00ebveshjesh dhe konfliktesh. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e leht\u00eb t\u00eb pranosh te partneri nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb sjelluri apo nj\u00eb t\u00eb met\u00eb, por pothuajse gjithmon\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e nevojshme, madje e domosdoshme, p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":20489,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[50],"tags":[2150],"class_list":["post-20488","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-intimitet","tag-cift-i-lumtur"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20488","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20488"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20488\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20489"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20488"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20488"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20488"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}