{"id":20189,"date":"2019-01-13T20:30:10","date_gmt":"2019-01-13T19:30:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/?p=20189"},"modified":"2019-01-13T11:37:37","modified_gmt":"2019-01-13T10:37:37","slug":"si-te-rindertosh-marredhenien-pas-nje-etape-te-veshtire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/2019\/01\/si-te-rindertosh-marredhenien-pas-nje-etape-te-veshtire\/","title":{"rendered":"Si t\u00eb rind\u00ebrtosh marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnien pas nj\u00eb etape t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><br><strong><em>Jeni n\u00eb \u00e7ift\ndhe t\u00eb dashuruar, megjithat\u00eb, ndjeni se di\u00e7kla ka ndryshuar. Ju nuk arrini t\u00eb\nkomunikoni, b\u00ebni dashuri m\u00eb rrall\u00eb, ose edhe m\u00eb keq, rrini duke u grindur gjith\u00eb\nkoh\u00ebn. Para se t\u00eb b\u00ebni valixhet dhe t\u00eb ikni, reflektoni: Si ta rind\u00ebrtoni \u00e7iftin\ntuaj? Si t\u2019i thoni tjetrit\/\u00ebs q\u00eb e doni ende? \u00c7far\u00eb kompromisi duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebni? P\u00ebr\nt\u00eb rigjetur rrug\u00ebn e njer\u00ebzve t\u00eb lumtur dhe t\u00eb dashuruar, ju japim disa k\u00ebshilla\np\u00ebr t\u00eb t\u00eb rr\u00ebzuar pengesat n\u00eb lidhje.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>Frederik\nBegbeder, nj\u00eb shkrimtar francez, ka th\u00ebn\u00eb \u00abdashuria \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb katastrof\u00eb e\nmrekullueshme, t\u00eb dish q\u00eb do t\u00eb p\u00ebrplasesh me nj\u00eb mur dhe prap\u00eb t\u00eb shtyp\u00ebsh\npedalin e gazit\u00bb. N\u00eb pamje t\u00eb par\u00eb ky citim mund t\u00eb duket pesimit, megjithat\u00eb,\nasnj\u00eb histori dashurie nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb lum\u00eb i gjat\u00eb, i qet\u00eb. T\u00eb duash \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebsh\nl\u00ebshime dhe, mbi t\u00eb gjitha, t\u00eb v\u00ebsh n\u00eb pik\u00ebpyetje edhe veten.&nbsp; <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>Asnj\u00eb \u00e7ift\nnuk ka dat\u00eb skadence, duhet \u00abthjesht\u00bb t\u00eb m\u00ebsosh t\u00eb kap\u00ebrcesh pengesat dhe t\u00eb\nthyesh rutin\u00ebn. E r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb jesh i nd\u00ebrgjegjsh\u00ebm q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb\nfush\u00eb me lule dhe q\u00eb pengesa t\u00eb shumta mund t\u00eb nd\u00ebrhyjn\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj: Tradh\u00ebti,\npapun\u00ebsi, v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb, ulje libidoje&#8230; <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Pse nj\u00eb \u00e7ift\nduhet t\u00eb kap\u00ebrcej\u00eb pengesat?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kini parasysh, n\u00eb\nepok\u00ebn e prind\u00ebrve tan\u00eb kishte pak divorce (kjo nuk ishte gjithmon\u00eb gj\u00eb e mir\u00eb).\nKjo ndodhte se ata nuk ia mbathnin me t\u00eb katra sapo hasnin penges\u00ebn e par\u00eb. Kjo\n\u00ebsht\u00eb edhe ar\u00ebsyeja pse ata kan\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat mobilje, nd\u00ebrsa ne i nd\u00ebrrojm\u00eb kaq\nshpesh.&nbsp; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Ju k\u00ebrkoni gj\u00ebra\nt\u00eb pamundura<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mbase jeni m\u00ebsuar\nme familje t\u00eb shp\u00ebrb\u00ebra dhe t\u00eb rip\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00eb, sa ju duket q\u00eb kjo gj\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb normale.\nEdhe defekti m\u00eb i vog\u00ebl kthehet n\u00eb burim konflikti dhe ju nuk rrini dot pa e\nmenduar. Ai flet me z\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb, nuk di t\u00eb vishet, ai \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb i ri (nj\u00eb\nvit) se ju&#8230;ar\u00ebsyet p\u00ebr t\u2019u ndar\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb shumta. Nga nj\u00ebra an\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i\ngjith\u00eb faji juaji. Jeni rritur me p\u00ebrrallat e Disneit dhe prisni prej vitesh\nprincin e kalt\u00ebr. Ju keni hequr dor\u00eb nga kali i bardh\u00eb dhe getat ngjitur pas\ntrupit, por k\u00ebrkoni q\u00eb ai t\u00eb jet\u00eb romantik, i kujdessh\u00ebm, inteligjent, zbavit\u00ebs,\ni bukur, i shoq\u00ebruesh\u00ebm. Jini realiste, askush nuk mund t\u00eb grumbulloj\u00eb kaq shum\u00eb\ncil\u00ebsi, as ju vet\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb e thjesht\u00eb, duke qen\u00eb vazhdimisht n\u00eb k\u00ebrkim t\u00eb\nperfeksionit, ju do t\u00eb gjeni defektet. Po sikur ta pranonit tjetrin ashtu si \u00ebsht\u00eb?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Nuk pranoni t\u00eb\nkaluar\u00ebn e tjetrit<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kur krijoni nj\u00eb \u00e7ift,\nju duhet t\u00eb dini se nuk jeni e para p\u00ebr t\u00eb. Ashtu si ju, edhe ai ka nj\u00eb t\u00eb\nkaluar dashurore. Nuk keni asnj\u00eb alternativ\u00eb tjet\u00ebr, ve\u00e7se ta pranoni k\u00ebt\u00eb\nfakt. Thuajini vetes se, fakti q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb me ju aktualisht, \u00ebsht\u00eb sepse ju do dhe\nju keni cil\u00ebsi q\u00eb ai nuk i ka gjetur tek nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr.&nbsp; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Sprovat me t\u00eb\ncilat p\u00ebrballet nj\u00eb \u00e7ift<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">K\u00ebtu m\u00eb posht\u00eb\nkeni nj\u00eb list\u00eb me sprovat me t\u00eb cilat p\u00ebrballet nj\u00eb \u00e7ift. Sigurisht, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb\nnj\u00eb list\u00eb e plot\u00eb, jan\u00eb vet\u00ebm rastet q\u00eb hasen m\u00eb shpesh. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>Tradh\u00ebtia<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ju keni vite n\u00eb \u00e7ift,\npor ja q\u00eb nj\u00ebri nga ju ka tradh\u00ebtuar tjetrin. Q\u00eb nga kjo koh\u00eb ju dyshoni p\u00ebr t\u00eb\nardhmen e \u00e7iftit. Ai q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb tradh\u00ebtuar ndjehet i zhg\u00ebnjyer, i prer\u00eb n\u00eb bes\u00eb\ndhe i humbur. Pyetjet q\u00eb ai i b\u00ebn vetes jan\u00eb t\u00eb shumta: \u00c7far\u00eb kishte tjetri\/a m\u00eb\nshum\u00eb se un\u00eb? A m\u00eb d\u00ebshiron ai\/ajo akoma? \u00abFajtori\u00bb ju betohet se ishte nj\u00eb\ngabim, p\u00ebr t\u00eb cil\u00ebn i vjen keq dhe q\u00eb ju do akoma. Megjithat\u00eb, ju e keni t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb\nt\u2019i zini p\u00ebrs\u00ebri bes\u00eb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>V\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi\np\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ju \u00ebnd\u00ebrroni t\u00eb b\u00ebni\nf\u00ebmij\u00eb, q\u00eb do t\u00eb marr\u00eb pak nga t\u00eb dy dhe do t\u00eb jet\u00eb simboli i past\u00ebr i dashuris\u00eb\nsuaj. P\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq, sado t\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqeni, nuk arrini t\u00eb b\u00ebni f\u00ebmij\u00eb. Ju nuk\nkuptoni, konsultoni shum\u00eb specialist\u00eb, b\u00ebni analiza. Ju keni p\u00ebrshtypjen s\u00eb \u00ebndrrat\ne familjes jan\u00eb rr\u00ebzuar dhe ju s\u2019mund t\u00eb b\u00ebni asgj\u00eb, <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>Ulje\nlibidoje<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ju jeni p\u00ebrpjekur\nta joshni duke u p\u00ebrpjekur t\u00eb vishni t\u00eb brendshme seksi dhe duke i th\u00ebn\u00eb fjal\u00eb\nme dy kuptime, por asgj\u00eb. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb moment seksi \u00ebsht\u00eb zero, ai shpik nj\u00eb\njustifikim t\u00eb kot\u00eb dhe shuan drit\u00ebn. Ju pyesni veten n\u00ebse jeni ende e d\u00ebshirueshme.\nSi pasoj\u00eb, ju e merrni tjetrin inat dhe ndjeheni e zhg\u00ebnjyer dhe e pak\u00ebnaqur. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong><em>Papun\u00ebsi <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">P\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq,\npapun\u00ebsia \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb gj\u00eb gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb e shpesht\u00eb. V\u00ebshtir\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjetur pun\u00eb\nmund t\u00eb krijoj\u00eb tensione n\u00eb gji t\u00eb \u00e7iftit. Ai q\u00eb punon ka nganj\u00ebher\u00eb p\u00ebrshtypjen\nse tjetri nuk p\u00ebrpiqet aq sa duhet, q\u00eb nuk k\u00ebrkon aq sa duhet&#8230;Pak nga pak zem\u00ebrohet\ndhe fillojn\u00eb grindjet. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Zgjidhjet e\nndryshime p\u00ebr t\u00eb rind\u00ebrtuar \u00e7iftin<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Filloni nj\u00eb terapi \u00e7ifti<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">N\u00ebse doni v\u00ebrtet\nt\u2019i jepni nj\u00eb shans lidhjes suaj, at\u00ebher\u00eb duhet t\u00eb komunikoni me nj\u00ebri-tjetrin.\nTerapia n\u00eb \u00e7ift do t\u2019ju lejoj\u00eb t\u2019i vini nj\u00eb em\u00ebr t\u00eb keqes. Fakti q\u00eb terapeuti\nluan nj\u00eb rol nd\u00ebrmjet\u00ebsi, lejon t\u00eb mos zem\u00ebrohesh dhe t\u00eb mbyll\u00ebsh\ndialogun.&nbsp; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Thyeni rutin\u00ebn<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kur jeni n\u00eb \u00e7ift,\nju keni tendenc\u00eb t\u00eb neglizhoni tjetrin, ta konsideroni si n\u00eb xhep. Por kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb\ne v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, ju duhet ta gjall\u00ebroni lidhjen, duke u kujdesur t\u00eb mbani gjall\u00eb flak\u00ebn\ne fillimit. Nuk doni t\u00eb keni p\u00ebrshtypjen se po ribini n\u00eb dashuri n\u00eb \u00e7do takim t\u00eb\nri? N\u00ebse ju e keni l\u00ebn\u00eb veten pas dore, duke u veshur vet\u00ebm me tuta, shpejt\nrinovoni garderob\u00ebn! Jo vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb, por edhe p\u00ebr veten. \u00cbsht\u00eb thelb\u00ebsore t\u00eb\nndjeheni e bukur dhe e d\u00ebshirueshme p\u00ebr t\u00eb joshur dhe befasuar tjetrin. N\u00ebse\ndoni t\u00eb shkoni m\u00eb tej, m\u00ebsoni t\u00eb zot\u00ebroni artin e erotizmit. Nj\u00eb jet\u00eb seksuale\ndhe sensuale e k\u00ebnaqshme \u00ebsht\u00eb garanci p\u00ebr nj\u00eb \u00e7ift t\u00eb dashuruar. Sigurisht,\nnuk duhet t\u00eb b\u00ebni vet\u00ebm ju p\u00ebrpjekje, edhe tjetri duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqet p\u00ebr t\u00eb\nrizgjuar pasionin e dit\u00ebve t\u00eb para. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Jetoni ve\u00e7<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Disa \u00e7ifte q\u00eb\nrrin\u00eb shum\u00eb ngjitur me nj\u00ebri-tjetrin, n\u00eb fund ndjehen si t\u00eb mbytur dhe fillojn\u00eb\nt\u00eb urrehen. Pse ndodh kjo? Sepse ata kan\u00eb nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00ebri-tjetrin, nuk arrijn\u00eb\ndot t\u00eb largohen dhe preferojn\u00eb t\u00eb shkat\u00ebrrohen pa dashje. T\u00eb tjer\u00eb, p\u00ebrkundrazi,\nkan\u00eb filluar t\u00eb jetojn\u00eb bashk\u00eb shum\u00eb shpejt, pa njohur ende zakonet e tjetrit.\nP\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq, jo t\u00eb gjitha \u00e7iftet jan\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar s\u00eb bashku. Kujdes,\nkjo nuk do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se ata nuk e duan nj\u00ebri-tjetrin, ose duhet t\u00eb ndahen, por\nmbase jetesa ve\u00e7 e ve\u00e7 \u00ebsht\u00eb zgjidhja m\u00eb e p\u00ebrshtatshme. P\u00ebrpar\u00ebsia e t\u00eb\njetuarit ve\u00e7 \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb dy t\u00eb dashuruarit gjejn\u00eb pavar\u00ebsin\u00eb e tyre. P\u00ebr m\u00eb tep\u00ebr,\nmungesa krijon nj\u00eb lloj malli, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb takimet do t\u00eb jen\u00eb m\u00eb romantike dhe t\u00eb\nnxehta. Ashtu si n\u00eb nj\u00eb lidhje n\u00eb distanc\u00eb, ju do t\u00eb vler\u00ebsoni \u00e7do moment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>B\u00ebni nj\u00eb pushim<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">P\u00ebr shum\u00eb vet\u00eb t\u00eb\nb\u00ebjn\u00eb nj\u00eb pauz\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb ndahen, por kjo nuk vlen p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb. Nj\u00eb pauz\u00eb\n\u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb e mir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb prapa dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb nj\u00eb bilanc t\u00eb \u00e7iftit.\nQ\u00ebllimi \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb shihni se si do t\u00eb ndjeheni pa tjetrin. N\u00ebse ju do t\u00eb ndjeheni\nm\u00eb mir\u00eb, m\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur dhe m\u00eb t\u00eb sigurt n\u00eb vetvete, \u00ebsht\u00eb e sigurt\u00eb se tjetri\nju mbyt dhe ju pengon t\u00eb jeni vetvetja. Pyeteni veten, a mund t\u00eb rregullohet kjo duke diskutuar me tjetrin?\nProblemi vjen nga un\u00eb, apo nga ai? Nga ana tjet\u00ebr, rreziku i pauz\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb\ntjetri t\u00eb ndjehet m\u00eb mir\u00eb dhe t\u00eb v\u00ebndos\u00eb t\u2019i\njap\u00eb fund lidhjes. N\u00eb rastin kur pauza juaj funksionon, kini kujdes t\u00eb filloni\nnga zeroja dhe t\u00eb rind\u00ebrtoni nj\u00eb lidhje t\u00eb re me partnerin\/en. M\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishmja\n\u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb ju t\u00eb ndjeheni i\/e lumtur dhe i\/e k\u00ebnaaur dhe, n\u00ebse gjykoni q\u00eb lidhja\njuaj meriton nj\u00eb shans t\u00eb dyt\u00eb, mos e kurseni veten!&nbsp; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jeni n\u00eb \u00e7ift dhe t\u00eb dashuruar, megjithat\u00eb, ndjeni se di\u00e7kla ka ndryshuar. Ju nuk arrini t\u00eb komunikoni, b\u00ebni dashuri m\u00eb rrall\u00eb, ose edhe m\u00eb keq, rrini duke u grindur gjith\u00eb koh\u00ebn. Para se t\u00eb b\u00ebni valixhet dhe t\u00eb ikni, reflektoni: Si ta rind\u00ebrtoni \u00e7iftin tuaj? Si t\u2019i thoni tjetrit\/\u00ebs q\u00eb e doni ende? \u00c7far\u00eb kompromisi [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":7702,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[88],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20189","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-seksologu"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20189","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20189"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20189\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7702"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20189"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20189"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20189"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}