{"id":17696,"date":"2018-01-13T10:01:25","date_gmt":"2018-01-13T09:01:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/?p=17696"},"modified":"2018-01-13T10:01:25","modified_gmt":"2018-01-13T09:01:25","slug":"i-bej-per-vete-dhe-i-le","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/2018\/01\/i-bej-per-vete-dhe-i-le\/","title":{"rendered":"I b\u00ebj p\u00ebr vete dhe i l\u00eb"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>P\u00ebrsh\u00ebndetje gazeta Intervista! E lexoj pothuajse \u00e7do jav\u00eb gazet\u00ebn tuaj dhe mendova q\u00eb t\u00eb shkruaj edhe un\u00eb nj\u00eb let\u00ebr drejtuar rubrik\u00ebs s\u00eb psikologes. Un\u00eb jam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 27 vje\u00e7e dhe kam patur nj\u00eb histori dashurie t\u00eb gjat\u00eb me nj\u00eb person i cili n\u00eb fund m\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjeu dhe q\u00eb nga ndarja me t\u00eb un\u00eb nuk po mundem dot t\u00eb krijoj lidhje. Sapo filloj t\u00eb p\u00eblqej dik\u00eb n\u00eb momentin q\u00eb e shoh q\u00eb e b\u00ebj p\u00ebr vete un\u00eb nga frika largohem dhe nuk dua t\u00eb kem m\u00eb kontakt fare me at\u00eb njeri. Kjo m\u00eb ka ndodhur jo vet\u00ebm me nj\u00eb mashkull po me disa, kam nisur t\u00eb provoj nj\u00eb histori dhe nuk kam mundur dot t\u2019a vazhdoj, nuk e di por m\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb si ves q\u00eb ti b\u00ebj njer\u00ebzit p\u00ebr vete dhe pastaj t\u00eb largohem dhe n\u00eb momentin q\u00eb ata dor\u00ebzohen me mua un\u00eb e vuaj dhe dua t\u00eb b\u00ebj \u00e7mos q\u00eb t\u00eb kthehen. Si shpjegohet kjo ju lutem?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><strong>Lorela Garuli, psikologe, email lorela_garuli@hotmail.com:-<\/strong> <strong>P\u00ebrsh\u00ebndetje! <\/strong>Fillimisht t\u00eb fal\u00ebnderoj q\u00eb ndan me ne shqet\u00ebsimin t\u00ebnd. \u00a0\u00cbsht\u00eb e natyrshme q\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjimet t\u00eb cilat vijn\u00eb nga ndarjet t\u00eb sjellin shum\u00eb munges\u00eb, trishtim, boshll\u00ebk dhe ndjesi refuzimi. Sidomos kur koha e kaluar me dik\u00eb ka qen\u00eb e gjat\u00eb dhe pritshm\u00ebrit\u00eb e larta; at\u00ebher\u00eb dhe zhg\u00ebnjimi \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb i madh dhe dhimbja m\u00eb e thell\u00eb. P\u00ebr nga natyra q\u00eb ka marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnia me partnerin, ndryshe nga marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet e tjera shoq\u00ebrore apo profesionale, kur p\u00ebrfundon sjell m\u00eb shum\u00eb kosto emocionale sepse preken m\u00eb shum\u00eb aspekte t\u00eb vetes ton\u00eb. \u00c7do ndarje \u00ebsht\u00eb e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb dhe shkakton ndjenja negative, duke e kthyer mendjen shpeshher\u00eb n\u00eb koh\u00ebn dhe kujtimet e bukura t\u00eb kaluara me at\u00eb njeri q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn ton\u00eb. Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mekaniz\u00ebm normal q\u00eb i ndodh pothuajse gjithkujt n\u00eb situata t\u00eb ngjashme, e q\u00eb nuk b\u00ebn gj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr vet\u00ebm prodhon m\u00eb shum\u00eb trishtim dhe vetmi.\u00a0 Por, koha ec\u00ebn p\u00ebrpara, fatmir\u00ebsisht. Hapi i par\u00eb q\u00eb duhet b\u00ebr\u00eb, \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb pranohet situata dhe t\u2019i jap\u00ebsh vetes koh\u00eb t\u00eb ezaurosh \u201c\u00e7\u00ebshtjet\u201d e l\u00ebna pezull. Ngjarjet q\u00eb ti p\u00ebrshkruan mund t\u00eb ndodhin sepse ka gjasa q\u00eb nuk ndihesh gati t\u00eb mir\u00ebpres\u00ebsh nj\u00eb njeri t\u00eb ri n\u00eb jet\u00ebn t\u00ebnde. Ndarjet, kur p\u00ebrjetohen shum\u00eb, jan\u00eb si plag\u00ebt, t\u00eb cilat kan\u00eb nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr koh\u00ebn e vet t\u00eb sh\u00ebrohen. Pa u \u201csh\u00ebruar\u201d psikologjikisht, \u00ebsht\u00eb e pamundur t\u00eb angazhohesh n\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie t\u00eb re. P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb arsye, \u00ebsht\u00eb thelb\u00ebsore t\u00eb zbrazesh nga cdo ndjesi q\u00eb ai person mund t\u00eb ket\u00eb l\u00ebn\u00eb. N\u00ebse ke ende gj\u00ebra t\u00eb l\u00ebna pezull, fol dhe sqaroji me t\u00eb. Fol p\u00ebr t\u00eb n\u00ebse ke nevoj\u00eb, mb\u00ebshtetu tek miqt\u00eb dhe shok\u00ebt, mos mendo se duke fshehur ndjesit\u00eb ato do kalojn\u00eb vet\u00eb, p\u00ebrkundrazi. Shkarko \u00e7do mendim dhe emocion \u00a0sepse ndarjet dhe zhg\u00ebnjimet kan\u00eb nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr katarsis dhe nj\u00eb lloj \u201cpastrimi\u201d. T\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto jan\u00eb parakushte p\u00ebr t\u2019u p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb m\u00eb tej n\u00eb raporte t\u00eb tjera, sepse ka shum\u00eb mund\u00ebsi q\u00eb frik\u00ebrat e m\u00ebparshme q\u00eb mund t\u00eb jen\u00eb krijuar nga kjo ndodhi, t\u00eb aktivizohen n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pavet\u00ebdijshme dhe n\u00eb t\u00eb tashmen.<\/p>\n<p>Kete shkrim mund ta lexoni te plote ne gazeten Intervista qe e gjeni n\u00eb t\u00eb gjitha kioskat e Shqip\u00ebris\u00eb dhe t\u00eb Greqis\u00eb. Mund t&#8217;ua dergojme edhe n\u00eb adres\u00ebn tuaj te emailit p\u00ebr vet\u00ebm 99 cent n\u00eb muaj. Kontaktoni me ne n\u00eb inbox!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>P\u00ebrsh\u00ebndetje gazeta Intervista! E lexoj pothuajse \u00e7do jav\u00eb gazet\u00ebn tuaj dhe mendova q\u00eb t\u00eb shkruaj edhe un\u00eb nj\u00eb let\u00ebr drejtuar rubrik\u00ebs s\u00eb psikologes. Un\u00eb jam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 27 vje\u00e7e dhe kam patur nj\u00eb histori dashurie t\u00eb gjat\u00eb me nj\u00eb person i cili n\u00eb fund m\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjeu dhe q\u00eb nga ndarja me t\u00eb un\u00eb nuk po [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":15923,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[1194],"class_list":["post-17696","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aktualitet","tag-lorela-garuli"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17696","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17696"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17696\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15923"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17696"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17696"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17696"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}