– Jam nj\u00eb djal\u00eb 18 vje\u00e7, i dashuruar marr\u00ebzisht pas nj\u00eb vajze te shkolla ime. Ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb vit m\u00eb e vog\u00ebl se un\u00eb dhe ka shum\u00eb fansa, sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb shum\u00eb e bukur. Nuk kam shoq\u00ebri me t\u00eb, por i buz\u00ebqesh dhe ma kthen gjithmon\u00eb buz\u00ebqeshjen. Jam b\u00ebr\u00eb me fiksime saq\u00eb e shoh edhe n\u00eb \u00ebnd\u00ebrr. Nuk di si t\u2019ia b\u00ebj… T\u2019ia shpreh ndjenjat apo jo? Kam frik\u00eb se do t\u00eb m\u00eb refuzoj\u00eb, sepse ajo ka shum\u00eb k\u00ebrkesa, por di q\u00eb po \u00e7mendem pas saj dhe kam l\u00ebn\u00eb edhe m\u00ebsimet pas dore. \u00c7far\u00eb m\u00eb k\u00ebshilloni t\u00eb b\u00ebj, se kam r\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb hall t\u00eb madh?
\nBorana Marku, psikologe: – I dashur 18 vje\u00e7ar, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb gabim apo hall t\u00eb p\u00eblqesh nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb apo edhe ta dashurosh, pra, \u00ebsht\u00eb normale aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr n\u00eb mosh\u00ebn tuaj. Do ta quaja problem faktin q\u00eb ju keni filluar t\u00eb fiksoheni pas saj, kjo po q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e gabuar sepse pasojat i keni th\u00ebn\u00eb po vet\u00eb: Pagjum\u00ebsi, r\u00ebnie n\u00eb m\u00ebsime. Me k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb i b\u00ebni d\u00ebm vet\u00ebm vetes suaj. T\u00eb lini pas dore m\u00ebsime p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb nj\u00eb femre!? Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb e gabuar, ju jeni shum\u00eb i ri dhe do t\u00eb njihni shum\u00eb femra n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj, do t\u00eb keni dhe lidhje ndoshta jo vet\u00ebm me nj\u00eb fem\u00ebr. \u00c7\u2019do t\u00eb thot\u00eb kjo? Q\u00eb sa her\u00eb bini n\u00eb dashuri, ta lini jet\u00ebn q\u00eb b\u00ebni pas dore, aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr studimet? Asnj\u00eb vajz\u00eb t\u00ebrhiqet ndaj nj\u00eb djali q\u00eb nuk studion apo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i formuar, i kujdessh\u00ebm dhe i kontrolluar. Pra, n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb pik\u00eb, ju duhet t\u00eb zgjoheni, t\u00eb filloni t\u00eb m\u00ebsoni, t\u00eb b\u00ebheni akoma m\u00eb i suksessh\u00ebm dhe m\u00eb i shkath\u00ebt n\u00eb kuptimin pozitiv dhe do t\u00eb shikoni q\u00eb do t\u00eb keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb sukses me femrat.
\n– Nd\u00ebrsa p\u00ebr femr\u00ebn n\u00eb fjal\u00eb, afrohuni me t\u00eb miq\u00ebsisht, nuk ka asgj\u00eb t\u00eb keqe n\u00ebse provoni t\u00eb flisni me t\u00eb. Mos u trembni nga bukuria e saj apo fansat q\u00eb ka rreth e rrotull sepse \u00e7do mashkull ka t\u00eb ve\u00e7antat e veta. Edhe n\u00ebse ju refuzon, nuk keni pse t\u00eb ndiheni keq, duhet ta vler\u00ebsoni m\u00eb shum\u00eb veten tuaj p\u00ebr cil\u00ebsit\u00eb q\u00eb keni, mos u bazoni te paraqitja. Ajo vajz\u00eb mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb e bukur, por ndoshta kur ta njihni si karakter, si natyr\u00eb, nuk do t\u2019ju p\u00eblqej\u00eb. Ndaj duhet t\u00eb provoni t\u00eb flisni me t\u00eb dhe n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyre, hiqeni fiksimin nj\u00eb her\u00eb e mir\u00eb. Duhet t\u00eb jeni me k\u00ebmb\u00eb n\u00eb tok\u00eb, pra, t\u00eb jeni realist. Jeta vazhdon, si ju pranoi vajza, ashtu edhe n\u00ebse nuk ju pranon. Asnj\u00eb fem\u00ebr nuk do t\u00eb ket\u00eb n\u00eb krah nj\u00eb mashkull t\u00eb d\u00ebshtuar apo t\u00eb depresionuar dhe aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr t\u00eb fiksuar pas nj\u00eb femre. Femrat t\u00ebrhiqen m\u00eb shum\u00eb ndaj meshkujve q\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb shkath\u00ebt, studioz\u00eb dhe q\u00eb jan\u00eb pak m\u00eb indiferent\u00eb, ama t\u00eb dashur dhe social\u00eb. Afrohuni si shok, pastaj duke par\u00eb e duke b\u00ebr\u00eb. N\u00ebse nuk ju pranon, futini nj\u00eb mendje t\u00eb leht\u00eb dhe shikoni rreth e rrotull se ka plot vajza t\u00eb tjera t\u00eb bukura e me vlera. Ju uroj fat!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
– Jam nj\u00eb djal\u00eb 18 vje\u00e7, i dashuruar marr\u00ebzisht pas nj\u00eb vajze te shkolla ime. Ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb vit m\u00eb e vog\u00ebl se un\u00eb dhe ka shum\u00eb fansa, sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb shum\u00eb e bukur. Nuk kam shoq\u00ebri me t\u00eb, por i buz\u00ebqesh dhe ma kthen gjithmon\u00eb buz\u00ebqeshjen. Jam b\u00ebr\u00eb me fiksime saq\u00eb e shoh edhe n\u00eb […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[86,219],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13430","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-psikologu","category-pyetje-pergjigje"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13430","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13430"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13430\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13430"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13430"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13430"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}