Un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb e cila ka vuajtur shum\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00eb. Vuajtjet e mia filluan q\u00eb n\u00eb vog\u00ebli, kur mw vdiq babai. Ai\u00a0 na la shum\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl mua dhe v\u00ebllain tim. Un\u00eb at\u00ebher\u00eb isha 6 vje\u00e7e dhe v\u00ebllai 4 vje\u00e7. Mami ishte nj\u00eb grua shum\u00eb e re n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, kur i ra kjo pesh\u00eb e madhe, q\u00eb t\u00eb rriste dy f\u00ebmij\u00eb e vetme.<\/p>\n
Nuk kaloi as nj\u00eb vit dhe prind\u00ebrit e saj e martuan n\u00eb qytet. N\u00eb fillim nuk na mori ne me vete, nuk e di p\u00ebrse dhe asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk e m\u00ebsova k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb. N\u00eb rrinim me gjyshin, gjyshen dhe daj\u00ebn. Mami vinte nganj\u00ebher\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb na par\u00eb, s\u00eb bashku me burrin q\u00eb kishte marr\u00eb. Isha e vog\u00ebl e nuk kuptoja asgj\u00eb nga k\u00ebto q\u00eb po ndodhte. Kur shikoja mamin me nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr burr\u00eb nuk m\u00eb vinte keq, m\u00eb dukej se ishte pjes\u00ebtar familjeje. Ai na p\u00ebrqafonte si mua ashtu dhe v\u00ebllan\u00eb dhe na sillte shum\u00eb gj\u00ebra t\u00eb mira p\u00ebr t\u00eb ngr\u00ebn\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb isha n\u00eb klas\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb at\u00ebher\u00eb, se mamaja m\u00eb kishte futur nj\u00eb vit me vones\u00eb, pwr shkak tw vdekjes sw babait. Deri n\u00eb klas\u00eb t\u00eb kat\u00ebrt, un\u00eb q\u00ebndrova n\u00eb fshat. Vitin e par\u00eb mamaja vinte m\u00eb shpesh, nd\u00ebrsa pastaj filloi t\u2019i rrallonte vizitat. E pyeta gjyshen se pse mami nuk vinte m\u00eb aq shpesh sepse m\u00eb merrte malli shum\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb dhe ajo mw tha: \u201cEh, po tani \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00eb i dyt\u00eb moj bij\u00eb e ka rrezik po t\u00eb l\u00ebviz\u00eb rrugave\u201d.<\/p>\n
Kur m\u00eb tha k\u00ebshtu, mendova se ishte vet\u00eb i dyt\u00eb s\u00eb bashku me at\u00eb burrin q\u00eb kishte marr\u00eb, por n\u00eb ver\u00eb ajo erdhi dhe n\u00eb krah kishte nj\u00eb bebe. Na puthi me mall t\u00eb madh.<\/p>\n
– Oh, sa m\u00eb ka marr\u00eb malli p\u00ebr ju! Nuk e di moj n\u00ebn\u00eb si do t\u00eb b\u00ebhet ky halli im? A mund t\u00eb rri m\u00eb pa ta. \u2013 iu drejtua gjyshes.<\/p>\n
– Duro dhe pak bij\u00eb! Nuk i dihet \u00e7far\u00eb sjell e nes\u00ebrmja. Ti tani nuk je fare vet\u00ebm. Ja, Zoti t\u00eb dha nj\u00eb engj\u00ebll q\u00eb ta kalosh k\u00ebt\u00eb koh\u00eb e cila do t\u00eb mbaroj\u00eb shpejt. Ti vet\u00ebm q\u00ebndro ashtu si\u00e7 ke q\u00ebndruar deri tani.<\/p>\n
Pash\u00eb n\u00eb syt\u00eb e mamit tim shum\u00eb lot, por kur hodhi shikimin mbi foshnj\u00ebn q\u00eb kishte sjell\u00eb me vete, fshiu lot\u00ebt dhe u duk m\u00eb ndryshe.<\/p>\n
– Merre n\u00eb krah\u00eb, zem\u00ebr – m\u2019u drejtua mua.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb e mora n\u00eb krah\u00eb dhe pash\u00eb se bebja m\u00eb shihte e buz\u00ebqeshte. Edhe un\u00eb i buz\u00ebqesha.<\/p>\n
– \u00cbsht\u00eb djal\u00eb, tani u b\u00ebre me dy v\u00ebllez\u00ebr. Duhet ta duash shum\u00eb, se ti je e madhja.<\/p>\n
– Po mami – i thash\u00eb, pa kuptuar asgj\u00eb…<\/p>\n
Mami ndenji shum\u00eb te ne n\u00eb fshat at\u00eb ver\u00eb. Un\u00eb k\u00ebnaqesha me v\u00ebllan\u00eb e vog\u00ebl. Ai ishte si nj\u00eb engj\u00ebll, tamam ashtu si kishte th\u00ebn\u00eb gjyshja. Pastaj, ajo iku p\u00ebrs\u00ebri dhe kur u ndam\u00eb, m\u00eb tha:<\/p>\n
– Edhe pak do jemi bashk\u00eb. Do ta b\u00ebsh klas\u00ebn e pest\u00eb n\u00eb qytet?<\/p>\n
– Mir\u00eb- thash\u00eb un\u00eb instiktivisht, pa ditur se cffar\u00eb po thoja. E ku e dija un\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb ishte qyteti?<\/p>\n
N\u00eb fund t\u00eb ver\u00ebs gjyshja m\u00eb tha se do t\u00eb shkoja tek mami n\u00eb qytet.<\/p>\n
– Po v\u00ebllai? A do t\u00eb vij\u00eb dhe ai me mua?<\/p>\n
– Ai do t\u00eb vij\u00eb m\u00eb von\u00eb. Shko ti nj\u00ebher\u00eb. Kujdes e sillu mir\u00eb ashtu si k\u00ebtu.<\/p>\n
Jeta n\u00eb qytet ishte komplet ndryshe nga ajo e fshatit. Jetonim n\u00eb nj\u00eb pallat dhe kisha nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb timen. N\u00eb fakt aty ishte dhe krevati i v\u00ebllait t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, por v\u00ebllain e mbante mami nga dhoma tjet\u00ebr. Sa her\u00eb shihja at\u00eb krevat mendoja t\u00eb ishte n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebllai q\u00eb kisha n\u00eb fshat.<\/p>\n
Shkolla ishte jo shum\u00eb larg sht\u00ebpis\u00eb si n\u00eb fshat dhe m\u00ebsueset ishin ndryshe. Ishte pra m\u00eb mir\u00eb se fshati, por mua m\u00eb mungonte shum\u00eb v\u00ebllai tjet\u00ebr dhe gjysh\u00ebrit. Pastaj n\u00eb qytet rrija m\u00eb shum\u00eb brenda se jasht\u00eb. Edhe ato her\u00eb q\u00eb dilja jasht\u00eb nuk flisnim me ask\u00ebnd dhe mami m\u00eb mbante sikur po m\u00eb fshihte.<\/p>\n
– M\u00eb ka marr\u00eb malli p\u00ebr v\u00ebllain. Edhe p\u00ebr gjyshin, gjyshen, daj\u00ebn, p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb. – i thash\u00eb nj\u00eb dit\u00eb mamit.<\/p>\n
– Edhe mua zem\u00ebr, por ja duhet t\u00eb durosh dhe pak sa t\u00eb vijn\u00eb pushimet e do t\u00eb shkosh.<\/p>\n
– Po pse nuk e marrim v\u00ebllain k\u00ebtu mami? Edhe ai \u00ebsht\u00eb f\u00ebmija yt!<\/p>\n
– Po edhe at\u00eb do ta marrim, por nuk na l\u00ebn\u00eb njer\u00ebzit duke pyetur pastaj se \u00e7far\u00eb ju kam. Prandaj t\u00eb mbaj dhe ty brenda q\u00eb t\u00eb mos merremi me thashetheme. Njer\u00ebzit jan\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebqinj dhe flasin shum\u00eb.<\/p>\n
P\u00ebr \u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb flisnin njer\u00ebzit? P\u00ebr ne q\u00eb ishim f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e saj?<\/p>\n
N\u00eb dark\u00eb d\u00ebgjova mamin t\u2019i thoshte burrit me t\u00eb cilin ishte martuar.<\/p>\n
– Nuk kemi \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb fshehim m\u00eb. Jan\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi nuk jetoj dot pa ta. Le ta din\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb se ke marr\u00eb nj\u00eb grua me f\u00ebmij\u00eb. E \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb keqe ka k\u00ebtu?<\/p>\n
– Nuk e di se \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb them. Ja vajz\u00ebn e mor\u00ebm e po e mbajm\u00eb t\u00eb fshehur. Si do t\u2019ja b\u00ebjm\u00eb me djalin? Apo nuk dhe i l\u00ebvizsh\u00ebm ai. A do ta mbash dot brenda?<\/p>\n
– Po gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebn k\u00ebshtu do t\u00eb jet\u00eb? \u2013 d\u00ebgjoja z\u00ebrin e mamit dhe kuptova se ajo po qante.<\/p>\n
Tani e kuptova se pse ajo na kishte l\u00ebn\u00eb atje n\u00eb fshat, se ishte turp t\u00eb na shihnin t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt. E pse ishte turp?Turp t\u00eb kesh f\u00ebmij\u00eb?Asgj\u00eb nuk po kuptoja.<\/p>\n
Ndoshta nga lot\u00ebt e mamit ai u prek dhe n\u00eb fundjav\u00eb shkoi dhe mori v\u00ebllan\u00eb. Isha tep\u00ebr e g\u00ebzuar. Ishim nj\u00eb familje e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb mami, burri i saj, dy v\u00ebllez\u00ebrit dhe un\u00eb. Edhe pse m\u00eb merrte malli shum\u00eb p\u00ebr gjysh\u00ebrit e daj\u00ebn prap\u00eb ndjehesha shum\u00eb mir\u00eb me familjen. Tani ishim t\u00eb kompletuar dhe nuk do t\u00eb ndaheshim m\u00eb nga mami yn\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Mir\u00ebpo dhe pas ardhjes s\u00eb v\u00ebllait ne nuk dilnim shum\u00eb jasht\u00eb. Shkonim n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb dhe vinim n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, nuk kishim shok\u00eb n\u00eb lagje dhe m\u00ebrziteshim gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebn brenda. V\u00ebllai ishte n\u00eb klas\u00eb t\u00eb tret\u00eb dhe ndjente shum\u00eb nevoj\u00ebn q\u00eb t\u00eb dilte e t\u00eb luante jasht\u00eb, se ashtu ishte m\u00ebsuar n\u00eb fshat. K\u00ebt\u00eb e kishte kuptuar dhe mami, prandaj ndoshta dhe p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb mori nj\u00eb vendim.<\/p>\n
– E di se ju nuk ndjeheni rehat k\u00ebtu. Jeni m\u00ebsuar n\u00eb fshat, prandaj sapo t\u00eb mbaroj\u00eb shkolla shkoni e rrini tek gjysh\u00ebrit.<\/p>\n
– Po ti mami do vish?<\/p>\n
– Po zem\u00ebr do vij dhe un\u00eb. Tani v\u00ebllai \u00ebsht\u00eb rritur dhe e kam m\u00eb t\u00eb leht\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Ashtu b\u00ebm\u00eb. Sapo mbaroi shkolla ne u nis\u00ebm p\u00ebr n\u00eb fshat. Sa u k\u00ebnaq\u00ebm kur pam\u00eb vendin ku kishim jetuar \u00e7aste t\u00eb bukura. Ishim m\u00ebrzitur n\u00eb at\u00eb sht\u00ebpi duke q\u00ebndruar gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebn brenda kat\u00ebr mureve.<\/p>\n
Mami ndenji nja nj\u00eb muaj e pastaj iku e mori me vete vet\u00ebm v\u00ebllain e vog\u00ebl.<\/p>\n
– Po t\u00eb doni ejani dhe ju me mua, por atje m\u00ebrziteni shum\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Un\u00eb nuk dua t\u00eb vij, dua t\u00eb rri k\u00ebtu me gjyshen n\u00eb fshat. \u2013tha v\u00ebllai i vog\u00ebl. \u2013 Nuk dua t\u00eb rri pa shok\u00eb e pa luajtur jasht\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Ishte i vog\u00ebl e kishte d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb lunate, por dhe un\u00eb at\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb kisha. Edhe pse e doja shum\u00eb familjen ashtu t\u00eb gjith\u00eb bashk\u00eb, doja m\u00eb shum\u00eb vendin ku isha e lir\u00eb. Me k\u00ebrkes\u00ebn ton\u00eb mami na la tek gjyshja. Un\u00eb e v\u00ebllai tani e kishim par\u00eb dhe si jetohet n\u00eb qytet k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb e dinim q\u00eb nuk ishte p\u00ebr ne ajo jet\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Jetuam dhe p\u00ebr 3 vjet n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb. Mami vinte m\u00eb shpesh e na takonte dhe ne ishim shum\u00eb mir\u00eb me gjysh\u00ebrit e daj\u00ebn. Mir\u00ebpo koh\u00ebt e fundit gjyshen e shihja q\u00eb qante shpesh. Nj\u00eb dit\u00eb erdhi burri me t\u00eb cilin ishte martuar mami dhe na mori. Nuk na coi tek sht\u00ebpia ku ne rrinim kur banonim n\u00eb qytet, por mori nj\u00eb rrug\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. Kur makina ndaloi ne zbrit\u00ebm n\u00eb oborrin e nj\u00eb spitali. N\u00eb nj\u00eb nga dhomat e tij ne takuam mamin. Ajo ishte shp\u00ebrfytyruar krejt\u00ebsisht. Bukuria e saj tanim\u00eb ishte vyshkur. Ishte dob\u00ebsuar krejt\u00ebsisht dhe mezi l\u00ebvizi buz\u00ebt p\u00ebr t\u00eb na th\u00ebn\u00eb t\u00eb afroheshim.<\/p>\n
E kuptuam se ajo ishte shum\u00eb e s\u00ebmur\u00eb. Na p\u00ebrqafonte dhe nga syt\u00eb i rridhnin lot\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Nuk jam k\u00ebnaqur asnj\u00ebher\u00eb me ju. Do m\u00eb mbetet peng pse nuk ju mora me vete.<\/p>\n
Dhe k\u00ebshtu mami yn\u00eb vdiq, n\u00eb mosh\u00ebn m\u00eb t\u00eb bukur. Jetoi me vuajtje t\u00eb m\u00ebdha. jetoi gjithmon\u00eb pa f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e saj pran\u00eb vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos e b\u00ebr\u00eb me fjal\u00eb burrin e dyt\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Q\u00eb nga ajo dit\u00eb gjyshja dhe gjyshi filluan t\u00eb shkriheshin si qiriri. \u00c7do m\u00ebngjes shikoja se si ata dal\u00ebngadal\u00eb po i afroheshin vdekjes.<\/p>\n
Pas nj\u00eb vitit vdiq gjyshja e 6 muaj pas saj dhe gjyshi. Burri me t\u00eb cilin u martua mami n\u00eb fillim kur ishin gjall\u00eb gjysh\u00ebrit vinte shpesh, por pastaj nuk erdhi m\u00eb. Edhe v\u00ebllain e vog\u00ebl nuk e sillte m\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Tanim\u00eb ishim vet\u00ebmne t\u00eb dy me daj\u00ebn. Daja mori nj\u00eb nuse pa das\u00ebm q\u00eb dhe sht\u00ebpia mos t\u00eb mbetej ashtu si e shkret\u00eb. N\u00eb fillim nusja ishte shum\u00eb e mir\u00eb, por kur b\u00ebri dy f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e saj mua m\u00eb ktheu n\u00eb sh\u00ebrb\u00ebtore dhe v\u00ebllain e kishte shum\u00eb inat. Tani ai ishte rritur dhe kishte nevoj\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb kishte nj\u00eb njeri q\u00eb ta m\u00ebsonte p\u00ebr shum\u00eb gj\u00ebra. Daja mundohej, por ai gjithmon\u00eb vinte i rraskapitur nga puna dhe nuk dinte \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb b\u00ebnte m\u00eb par\u00eb n\u00eb at\u00eb or\u00eb q\u00eb vinte n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi.<\/p>\n
Koha kaloi dhe un\u00eb u b\u00ebra 18 vje\u00e7., v\u00ebllai 16.<\/p>\n
– T\u00eb kan\u00eb k\u00ebrkuar t\u00eb martohesh- m\u00eb tha nusja e daj\u00ebs. \u2013Sa fat ke mi!Alamet djali t\u00eb ka r\u00ebn\u00eb p\u00ebr hise.<\/p>\n
– Po kush \u00ebsht\u00eb ky? Un\u00eb nuk njoh ndonxj\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– E c\u2019t\u00eb duhet ty t\u00eb njoh\u00ebsh njeri? Ja t\u00eb erdhi fati n\u00eb der\u00eb. N\u00eb qytet mi! Lum si ti! Apo do t\u00eb rrish k\u00ebtu n\u00eb fshat e t\u00eb hash dynjan\u00eb me lop\u00eb e dele?<\/p>\n
Nuk fola se po prisja t\u00eb vinte daja e ta sqaroja me t\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb ngat\u00ebrres\u00eb. Kur erdhi daja m\u2019u duk se do t\u00eb shp\u00ebtoja.<\/p>\n
– Ti ke t\u00eb drejt\u00eb t\u00eb zgjedh\u00ebsh. Shihe nj\u00ebher\u00eb e po nuk t\u00eb p\u00eblqeu thuaj jo. – tha ai.<\/p>\n
Isha m\u00ebsuar q\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb t\u2019i bindesha daj\u00ebs, se ai vet\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb m\u00eb fliste me \u00ebmb\u00eblsi dhe kisha shum\u00eb besim tek ai.<\/p>\n
Kur erdhi djali q\u00eb m\u00eb kishte k\u00ebrkuar bashk\u00eb me t\u00eb atin vendosa se m\u00eb mir\u00eb do t\u00eb ishte t\u00eb b\u00ebja ashtu si m\u00eb than\u00eb daja e nusja e tij. Ai ishte shum\u00eb simpatik dhe m\u2019u duk djal\u00eb i mir\u00eb. Un\u00eb e v\u00ebllai ishim t\u00eb tep\u00ebrt n\u00eb at\u00eb sht\u00ebpi tani. Nuk e mendova gjat\u00eb dhe thash\u00eb po.<\/p>\n
E k\u00ebshtu me pak fjal\u00eb u fejova e u martova. Dhe n\u00eb fakt nuk kisha gabuar. Pas nj\u00eb viti martes\u00eb mora dhe v\u00ebllain n\u00eb qytet e ai mbaroi shkoll\u00ebn e tani \u00ebsht\u00eb jasht\u00eb shtetitAi \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb bashk\u00ebshort i mrekulluesh\u00ebm me t\u00eb cilin kam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl. Disa her\u00eb e takoj dhe v\u00ebllain e vog\u00ebl dhe ndjej se edhe atij i mungon shum\u00eb mami ashtu si mua.<\/p>\n
Gjithmon\u00eb m\u00eb shkon mendja se si shkoi mami im duke menduar p\u00ebr ne. Ah, sikur t\u00eb na shihte nga lart se ne tani jemi rregulluar shum\u00eb mir\u00eb, mungon vet\u00ebm ajo q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb me ne. Por jam e sigurt se ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb me gjyshin e gjyshin t\u00eb cil\u00ebt e desh\u00ebn aq fort dhe i shkuan nga pas se nuk rrinin dot pa t\u00eb.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb e cila ka vuajtur shum\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00eb. Vuajtjet e mia filluan q\u00eb n\u00eb vog\u00ebli, kur mw vdiq babai. Ai\u00a0 na la shum\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl mua dhe v\u00ebllain tim. Un\u00eb at\u00ebher\u00eb isha 6 vje\u00e7e dhe v\u00ebllai 4 vje\u00e7. Mami ishte nj\u00eb grua shum\u00eb e re n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":12112,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[95],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12511","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-rrefime-mekatesh"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12511","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12511"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12511\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12112"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12511"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12511"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12511"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}