<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb ish-njerk\u00eb. Po jua them q\u00eb n\u00eb fillim se dua t\u00eb kuptoni me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ndieva un\u00eb dhe besoj e ndiejn\u00eb edhe shum\u00eb gra t\u00eb cilat supozohet se jan\u00eb t\u00eb lumtura, por n\u00eb brend\u00ebsi t\u00eb zemr\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre ka vet\u00ebm dhimbje.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb u dashurova marr\u00ebzisht me nj\u00eb burr\u00eb rreth t\u00eb pes\u00ebdhjetave. Ai kishte qen\u00eb i martuar m\u00eb par\u00eb dhe kishte tre f\u00ebmij\u00eb, dy vajza dhe nj\u00eb djal\u00eb q\u00eb jetonin me t\u00eb \u00ebm\u00ebn dhe ai kalonte me ta vet\u00ebm fundjavat. I kishte t\u00eb m\u00ebdhenj, por jo aq shum\u00eb sa t\u00eb kuptonin at\u00eb q\u00eb po p\u00ebrjetoja un\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Un\u00eb u dashurova me t\u00eb n\u00eb pun\u00eb, si shumica e lidhjeve. Pak vet\u00eb u kan\u00eb shp\u00ebtuar k\u00ebtyre dashurive. Ai ishte n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtin pozicion me mua, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb dihet se nuk u dashurova p\u00ebr interes. Un\u00eb kisha qen\u00eb e fejuar m\u00eb par\u00eb dhe nuk pata fat t\u00eb martohesha. At\u00ebher\u00eb isha rreth 35-vje\u00e7e. Kishim diferenc\u00eb, si\u00e7 e shihni, por kjo gj\u00eb nuk binte n\u00eb sy aspak, p\u00ebr faktin se ai ishte shum\u00eb i mbajtur. Ishim nj\u00eb \u00e7ift q\u00eb kur na shihje, do t\u00eb habiteshe se si mund t\u00eb shkonin aq shum\u00eb dy njer\u00ebz.<\/p>\n
Nejse, ne u fejuam e u martuam shum\u00eb shpejt se nuk kishim \u00e7far\u00eb t\u00eb prisnim. Jeta n\u00eb \u00e7ift ishte nj\u00eb nga gj\u00ebrat m\u00eb t\u00eb bukura q\u00eb mund t\u00eb m\u00eb ndodhte. Edhe pse ishim n\u00eb pun\u00eb bashk\u00eb, un\u00eb nuk jam tip xhelozeje, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb realisht lidhja jon\u00eb ishte e fort\u00eb dhe besonim se do t\u2019i rezistonte koh\u00ebs. K\u00ebt\u00eb e besonin edhe t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ata q\u00eb na shihnin dhe sidomos shoq\u00ebria jon\u00eb. Por, si gjithmon\u00eb, do t\u00eb dal\u00eb nj\u00eb gj\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb ta b\u00ebj\u00eb jet\u00ebn t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb. Hera e par\u00eb e takimit me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tij ishte normale. Ai i kishte thirrur t\u00eb tre dhe takimin e kishte l\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb lokal.<\/p>\n
– Po pse n\u00eb lokal? – i thash\u00eb. – Mund t\u00eb kisha p\u00ebrgatitur disa gj\u00ebra dhe do t\u00eb rrinim rehat n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi.<\/p>\n
– Thash\u00eb mos t\u00eb t\u00eb shtoja emocionet e gatimit, plus atyre q\u00eb ke p\u00ebr njohjen me ta.<\/p>\n
– Sigurisht q\u00eb kam emocione, por do t\u00eb mundohesha q\u00eb t\u00eb dilja sa m\u00eb mir\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Mos u shqet\u00ebso, r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi ka t\u00eb krijohet nj\u00eb lidhje e bukur mes jush.<\/p>\n
N\u00eb fakt, at\u00ebher\u00eb nuk e kuptova mir\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb donte t\u00eb thoshte, por tanim\u00eb e kuptoj se dhe ai e kishte patur shum\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb njihte me ta dhe sidomos, q\u00eb un\u00eb t\u2019u lija p\u00ebrshtypje t\u00eb mira. Ata erdh\u00ebn me vones\u00eb. I solli daja i tyre. M\u00eb dhan\u00eb dor\u00ebn dhe un\u00eb, instinktivisht doja t\u2019i puthja kur u dhash\u00eb dor\u00ebn, por vajza e madhe m\u00eb shtyu \u201cme stil\u201d, q\u00eb t\u00eb mos kuptohej.<\/p>\n
U hutova pak, por nuk ia vura edhe shum\u00eb veshin dhe u dhash\u00eb vet\u00ebm dor\u00ebn. Ata u ul\u00ebn t\u00eb tre af\u00ebr nj\u00ebri-tjetrit, duke futur n\u00eb mes t\u00eb atin. Nga pozicioni q\u00eb kishin marr\u00eb, dukej sikur do ta mbronin nga un\u00eb. K\u00ebto gj\u00ebra i kuptoj tani, se at\u00ebher\u00eb nuk po i shikoja me k\u00ebt\u00eb sy. Ishin t\u00eb sjellsh\u00ebm dhe flisnin aq bukur sa kishe d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb madhe t\u2019i d\u00ebgjoje.<\/p>\n
– Q\u00ebkur babi \u00ebsht\u00eb lidhur me ty, duket m\u00eb i fresk\u00ebt, apo jo babi? – tha nj\u00ebra nga vajzat.<\/p>\n
– Po, zem\u00ebr. E dija se ti do t\u00eb m\u00eb kuptoje e do ta merrje me sportivitet martes\u00ebn time.<\/p>\n
– Po si mund t\u00eb mos e marr? Ne jemi t\u00eb gjith\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur p\u00ebr lumturin\u00eb t\u00ebnde. Apo jo? – i pyeti dy t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt t\u00eb cil\u00ebt, tani q\u00eb i shoh gj\u00ebrat m\u00eb qart\u00ebsi, m\u00eb duken si dy ushtar\u00ebt e saj. Ata i bindeshin p\u00ebr gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb ajo thoshte.<\/p>\n
– Dhe p\u00ebr m\u00eb tep\u00ebr, ti je kaq e bukur! – m\u2019u drejtua mua. \u2013 T\u00eb faleminderit q\u00eb erdhe n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e babit ton\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Pra, kjo lloj bisede na shoq\u00ebroi gjat\u00eb takimit t\u00eb par\u00eb. Disa her\u00eb ndjeja dyshime se mos ishte gjith\u00e7ka fallso, por jo. E ndjeva veten me fat se si mund t\u00eb kishte mund\u00ebsi q\u00eb k\u00ebta f\u00ebmij\u00eb m\u00eb desh\u00ebn me her\u00ebn e par\u00eb q\u00eb m\u00eb pan\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Ia kaluam shum\u00eb mir\u00eb, zem\u00ebr!<\/p>\n
– Po shum\u00eb mir\u00eb. Je me fat q\u00eb ke f\u00ebmij\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb. M\u2019u duk vetja shum\u00eb rehat me ta. M\u00eb par\u00eb mendoja se do t\u00eb ishin ndopak t\u00eb inatosur me mua, por\u2026 – i thash\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– T\u00eb inatosur me ty? E pse duhet t\u00eb jen\u00eb?<\/p>\n
– Po ja, q\u00eb kam z\u00ebn\u00eb vendin e n\u00ebn\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre.<\/p>\n
– Ata e kan\u00eb pritur shum\u00eb mir\u00eb divorcin, mos u merakos aspak. Un\u00eb e dija se ata do t\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00eblqenin ashtu sikurse t\u00eb p\u00eblqeva un\u00eb.<\/p>\n
K\u00ebshtu mendova edhe un\u00eb. Takimi tjet\u00ebr ishte n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi. Ishte e diel dhe ne si zakonisht hanim n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi. U mundova t\u00eb gatuaja duke pyetur burrin se \u00e7far\u00eb preferonin. B\u00ebra t\u00eb gjitha p\u00ebrgatitjet dhe mendova se do t\u2019ia kalonim shk\u00eblqyesh\u00ebm. N\u00eb fillim shkoi gjith\u00e7ka mir\u00eb, por kur p\u00ebr nj\u00eb \u00e7ast mbeta vet\u00ebm me vajz\u00ebn e madhe, ajo m\u00eb tha:<\/p>\n
– Nuk e di si mund t\u00eb rrish me babin ti!<\/p>\n
– Pse? – e pyeta t\u00ebr\u00eb kureshtje.<\/p>\n
– Ai \u00ebsht\u00eb ende i dashuruar me mamin, si mund t\u00eb t\u00eb dashuroj\u00eb ty?!<\/p>\n
Ishte nj\u00eb bomb\u00eb q\u00eb m\u00eb ra. Pse duhet t\u00eb m\u2019i thoshte k\u00ebto gj\u00ebra?! Ajo ishte e rritur q\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebnte k\u00ebsi loj\u00ebrash me mua. Q\u00eb her\u00ebn e par\u00eb q\u00eb e kisha takuar, kisha dyshuar te sjellja e saj kundrejt meje, por mendova t\u00eb mos e zgjasja q\u00eb t\u00eb mos krijoja ndonj\u00eb z\u00ebnk\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Eh, k\u00ebshtu \u00ebsht\u00eb jeta, zem\u00ebr!<\/p>\n
– Un\u00eb t\u00eb paralajm\u00ebrova. Do t\u00eb kujtohesh m\u00eb von\u00eb p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb thash\u00eb!<\/p>\n
U bashkova me pjes\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr t\u00eb familjes q\u00eb t\u00eb mos e d\u00ebgjoja m\u00eb tep\u00ebr. Sapo m\u00eb pa, burri m\u00eb tha:<\/p>\n
– \u00c7\u2019ke? Nuk je mir\u00eb? M\u00eb dukesh si e zverdhur…<\/p>\n
– Jo, shum\u00eb mir\u00eb jam. Nuk kam asgj\u00eb, ndoshta jam pak e lodhur, zem\u00ebr! – kur i thash\u00eb \u201czem\u00ebr\u201d, m\u2019u dridh pak z\u00ebri se kujtova fjal\u00ebt e s\u00eb bij\u00ebs. E kap\u00ebrdiva dhe vazhdova t\u00eb sillesha si m\u00eb par\u00eb. Kur ata ik\u00ebn, i thash\u00eb burrit.<\/p>\n
– A je i sigurt q\u00eb m\u00eb do m\u00eb shum\u00eb se \u00e7do fem\u00ebr tjet\u00ebr?<\/p>\n
– Zem\u00ebr, \u00e7\u2019jan\u00eb k\u00ebto q\u00eb thua? Nga t\u00eb lindi kjo pyetje?<\/p>\n
– Kam nevoj\u00eb t\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj nj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigje nga ti.<\/p>\n
– Ti je jeta ime! T\u00eb dua dhe kam p\u00ebr t\u00eb t\u00eb dashur gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebs!<\/p>\n
K\u00ebto fjal\u00eb m\u00eb b\u00ebn\u00eb ta kaloja pak shijen e hidhur t\u00eb asaj q\u00eb p\u00ebrjetova me t\u00eb bij\u00ebn, mir\u00ebpo n\u00eb mendjen time po formohej nj\u00eb re e zez\u00eb dyshimi p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb martes\u00eb. Sa her\u00eb q\u00eb bashkoheshim me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tij, m\u00eb dukej sikur largohesha nga burri im. Nganj\u00ebher\u00eb b\u00ebja nj\u00eb hap prapa e i shikoja se sa bukur dukeshin t\u00eb gjith\u00eb s\u00eb bashku. Ata e rrethonin gjithmon\u00eb t\u00eb atin sikur donin ta mbronin. K\u00ebto gj\u00ebra dhe shum\u00eb t\u00eb tjera q\u00eb n\u00eb dukje ishin t\u00eb vogla, m\u00eb b\u00ebn\u00eb q\u00eb t\u2019i shprehesha hapur burrit.<\/p>\n
– M\u00eb duket se f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tu m\u00eb urrejn\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Nga na doli kjo gj\u00eb?! – u habit ai s\u00eb tep\u00ebrmi. – Ata nuk t\u00eb heqin nga goja asnj\u00ebher\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– P\u00ebr mir\u00eb apo p\u00ebr keq? – e pyeta.<\/p>\n
– Si?! Po thua se f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi flasin keq p\u00ebr ty? \u00c7\u2019t\u00eb ka gjetur ty, se nuk po t\u00eb kuptoj?! Nj\u00eb e dy e flet me inat p\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi.<\/p>\n
– Un\u00eb?! Ti nuk e sheh at\u00eb q\u00eb shoh un\u00eb…<\/p>\n
– E \u00e7far\u00eb sheh ti?! – ai po fliste me nj\u00eb gjuh\u00eb q\u00eb nuk e kisha d\u00ebgjuar ta p\u00ebrdorte ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb, jo vet\u00ebm me mua, por me asnj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr, madje as n\u00eb pun\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Shoh at\u00eb q\u00eb ata m\u00eb pandehin si nj\u00eb penges\u00eb mes teje e ish-gruas t\u00ebnde, n\u00ebn\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre.<\/p>\n
– Nuk e di se sa her\u00eb duhet t\u00eb ta them q\u00eb nuk kam asgj\u00eb me ish-gruan. Lidhja jon\u00eb p\u00ebrfundoi shum\u00eb koh\u00eb para se t\u00eb t\u00eb njihja ty.<\/p>\n
– Por p\u00ebr ta takuar e takon ende, ama!<\/p>\n
– Pse, sipas teje, duhet t\u00eb mbyll syt\u00eb kur ta shoh?<\/p>\n
– Po flet me nj\u00eb ton t\u00eb tmerrsh\u00ebm, – i thash\u00eb. – Un\u00eb po them ato q\u00eb kam koh\u00eb q\u00eb i bluaj n\u00eb vetvete. Sa her\u00eb q\u00eb takohemi me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tu, ata mundohen t\u00eb m\u00eb ulin e t\u00eb m\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb sikur nuk jam njeriu i duhur p\u00ebr ty. Kjo m\u00eb vret shum\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– Un\u00eb nuk e shoh di\u00e7ka t\u00eb till\u00eb. Ndoshta ti q\u00eb mendon gabim dhe sheh at\u00eb q\u00eb do.<\/p>\n
E mbylla bised\u00ebn se nuk po arrija n\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrfundim. Biseda t\u00eb tilla si kjo kishim shum\u00eb, aq sa un\u00eb u lodha s\u00eb b\u00ebri \u201cnjerk\u00ebn\u201d, sepse kisha nj\u00eb jet\u00eb timen q\u00eb mund ta shijoja n\u00eb m\u00ebnyra t\u00eb ndryshme. Edhe pse mundohesha ta kap\u00ebrdija sjelljen e tyre, p\u00ebr hir t\u00eb dashuris\u00eb q\u00eb kisha p\u00ebr burrin, erdhi nj\u00eb koh\u00eb kur nuk munda ta shtyja m\u00eb.<\/p>\n
– \u00cbsht\u00eb m\u00eb mir\u00eb t\u00eb ndahemi. Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnia jon\u00eb po komplikohet dhe nuk besoj se do t\u00eb p\u00ebrmir\u00ebsohet. \u2013 i thash\u00eb nj\u00eb dit\u00eb burrit kur po pinim kafen e m\u00ebngjesit.<\/p>\n
Ai filloi t\u00eb m\u00eb thoshte q\u00eb e kisha gabim e t\u00eb fiste p\u00ebr dashurin\u00eb ton\u00eb, por nuk kishte mund\u00ebsi t\u00eb ma kthente mendjen. Nuk kisha arsye t\u00eb duroja q\u00eb dit\u00ebt e pushimit t\u2019i kaloja n\u00eb nj\u00eb stres t\u00eb till\u00eb. K\u00ebshtu, ndoshta plot\u00ebsoja edhe d\u00ebshir\u00ebn e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve t\u00eb tij. Q\u00eb n\u00eb fillim, ata k\u00ebt\u00eb synonin; q\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb m\u00ebrzitnin e ne t\u00eb dy t\u00eb ndaheshim. Dhe k\u00ebshtu vendosa edhe un\u00eb. U ndava, edhe pse e doja shum\u00eb dhe mendoja se do t\u00eb jetoja gjat\u00eb me t\u00eb, por nuk jam penduar aspak. Tani jam e lir\u00eb t\u00eb jetoj si t\u00eb dua e jo t\u00eb vras mendjen n\u00eb jam e duhura p\u00ebr t\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Po ta mendosh, grat\u00eb e divorcuara jan\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb lira se burrat. Ato i mbajn\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt gjat\u00eb jav\u00ebs kur shumic\u00ebn e koh\u00ebs jan\u00eb n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb a n\u00eb kop\u00ebsht dhe n\u00eb fundjav\u00eb, jan\u00eb t\u00eb lira, nd\u00ebrsa burrat punojn\u00eb gjat\u00eb jav\u00ebs e nuk kan\u00eb koh\u00eb t\u00eb shijojn\u00eb asgj\u00eb, nd\u00ebrsa n\u00eb fundjav\u00eb duhet t\u00eb rrin\u00eb me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt. Dhe ne, q\u00eb martohemi me burra t\u00eb divorcuar, kemi \u00e7do fundjav\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebt me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tyre. N\u00ebse ata t\u00eb duan, gj\u00eb q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb shum\u00eb e rrall\u00eb, je n\u00eb rregull, por n\u00eb shumic\u00ebn e rasteve ti je nj\u00eb tabel\u00eb qitjeje p\u00ebr ta, ndaj nuk p\u00ebrballohet…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Un\u00eb q\u00eb po ju shkruaj jam nj\u00eb ish-njerk\u00eb. Po jua them q\u00eb n\u00eb fillim se dua t\u00eb kuptoni me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ndieva un\u00eb dhe besoj e ndiejn\u00eb edhe shum\u00eb gra t\u00eb cilat supozohet se jan\u00eb t\u00eb lumtura, por n\u00eb brend\u00ebsi t\u00eb zemr\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre ka vet\u00ebm dhimbje. Un\u00eb u dashurova marr\u00ebzisht me […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[94],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11358","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-histori-nga-jeta"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11358","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11358"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11358\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11358"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11358"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11358"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}