– Jam e lidhur me nj\u00eb djal\u00eb prej nj\u00eb viti. \u00cbsht\u00eb djal\u00eb i mir\u00eb, serioz, i rregullt dhe ka q\u00ebllime serioze ndaj meje sepse m\u00eb ka prezantuar me familjen etj. Ajo q\u00eb m\u00eb shqet\u00ebson \u00ebsht\u00eb se ai flet shum\u00eb pak dhe shpesh kjo gj\u00eb m\u00eb m\u00ebrzit shum\u00eb. Ulemi p\u00ebr nj\u00eb kafe dhe ai m\u00eb shum\u00eb hesht sesa flet. Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb m\u00eb duket sikur nuk ka asnj\u00eb lloj interesi ndaj meje dhe m\u00eb tremb sepse them: \u201cJa, kur t\u00eb m\u00eb thot\u00eb nuk m\u00eb do m\u00eb\u201d. Kur flas me shoqet, ato m\u00eb thon\u00eb se \u00ebsht\u00eb normale, sepse meshkujt flasin m\u00eb pak dhe se s\u2019ka ndonj\u00eb problem, se duhet t\u00eb m\u00ebsohem me k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb. Ju, si psikolog\u00eb, si mendoni?
\nBorana Marku, psikologe: – Sipas nj\u00eb studimi n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb fush\u00eb dhe disa k\u00ebrkimeve q\u00eb jan\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb duke testuar disa \u00e7ifte, \u00ebsht\u00eb arritur n\u00eb p\u00ebrfundimin se shumica e meshkujve flasin m\u00eb pak sesa femrat dhe shum\u00eb femra k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb e kan\u00eb pasur problem, sidomos n\u00eb fillimet e tyre. Nj\u00eb n\u00eb 4 gra \u00ebsht\u00eb shprehur n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb: \u201cNervozohem se partneri im flet shum\u00eb pak dhe kur e pyes p\u00ebr ndonj\u00eb gj\u00eb, i bie shkurt\u201d. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast, jan\u00eb pyetur burrat se \u00e7far\u00eb i nervozon m\u00eb shum\u00eb dhe ata jan\u00eb shprehur: \u201cM\u00eb nervozon fakti q\u00eb duhet t\u2019i p\u00ebrgjigjem \u00e7do lloj pyetjeje, t\u00eb tilla si: pse nuk flet? Pse nuk m\u00eb telefonon vazhdimisht? Si nuk pyet si je, pse nuk lajm\u00ebron kur vonohesh? etj.\u201d.
\nPra, e p\u00ebrgjithshmja ishte e till\u00eb q\u00eb femrat ankohen se partner\u00ebt e tyre flasin shum\u00eb pak, nd\u00ebrsa burrat nga ana tjet\u00ebr ankohen se femrat flasin shum\u00eb dhe duan q\u00eb dhe ne t\u00eb jemi si ato! Pra, ky \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb fakt q\u00eb ka ekzistuar dhe nuk do t\u00eb ndryshoj\u00eb as tani dhe as n\u00eb t\u00eb ardhmen, mes burrit dhe gruas. Por, kjo s\u2019do t\u00eb thot\u00eb q\u00eb nj\u00eb burr\u00eb q\u00eb nuk flet \u00ebsht\u00eb i ftoht\u00eb, apo ka ndonj\u00eb problem, thjesht kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb natyr\u00ebn e tij, ndaj ju nuk duhet t\u00eb shqet\u00ebsoheni p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb gj\u00eb.
\n– N\u00ebse doni v\u00ebrtet ta b\u00ebni at\u00eb t\u00eb flas\u00eb, at\u00ebher\u00eb p\u00ebrpiquni t\u00eb tregoni interes p\u00ebr pasionet e tij, bot\u00ebn e tij, k\u00ebrkoni t\u00eb dini se \u00e7far\u00eb i p\u00eblqen m\u00eb shum\u00eb atij dhe hapni pik\u00ebrisht k\u00ebto tema. Do ta shikoni se si do t\u00eb flas\u00eb partneri juaj, do t\u2019ju duket llafazan m\u00eb pas. Fakti se ai flet pak, nuk duhet t\u2019ju shqet\u00ebsoj\u00eb aspak, aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr q\u00eb ai ka treguar me vepra q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb serioz ndaj jush dhe ka q\u00ebllime serioze. T\u00eb folurit pak te meshkujt \u00ebsht\u00eb di\u00e7ka e zakonshme tashm\u00eb, aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr kur i b\u00ebni shum\u00eb pyetje apo i k\u00ebrkoni gj\u00ebra. K\u00ebtu do t\u00eb heshtin fare, sepse nuk u p\u00eblqen nj\u00eb gj\u00eb e till\u00eb, u duket sikur po e merrni n\u00eb pyetje si n\u00eb hetuesi dhe do ta lodhni. Ndaj flisni p\u00ebr gj\u00ebrat q\u00eb atij i p\u00eblqejn\u00eb n\u00ebse doni ta b\u00ebj\u00eb t\u00eb flas\u00eb. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb, pak nga pak edhe ai do t\u00eb flas\u00eb edhe p\u00ebr bot\u00ebn tuaj dhe do t\u2019i zgjidhet gjuha t\u00eb bisedoni edhe p\u00ebr shum\u00eb tema t\u00eb tjera. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
– Jam e lidhur me nj\u00eb djal\u00eb prej nj\u00eb viti. \u00cbsht\u00eb djal\u00eb i mir\u00eb, serioz, i rregullt dhe ka q\u00ebllime serioze ndaj meje sepse m\u00eb ka prezantuar me familjen etj. Ajo q\u00eb m\u00eb shqet\u00ebson \u00ebsht\u00eb se ai flet shum\u00eb pak dhe shpesh kjo gj\u00eb m\u00eb m\u00ebrzit shum\u00eb. Ulemi p\u00ebr nj\u00eb kafe dhe ai m\u00eb shum\u00eb […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[86,219],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10460","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-psikologu","category-pyetje-pergjigje"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10460","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10460"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10460\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10460"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10460"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/intervista.al\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10460"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}